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AIBU?

to think my SIL saying my DH has signed his mum's death warrant is OTT?

17 replies

spiralqueen · 23/07/2009 22:19

My DH came down with swine flu this week, not really badly but is on Tamiflu as a precaution. Our 19 mth DD (who has hacking cough) and myself have not caught it and have been told that we won't get it if we haven't caught it from DH so far.

DH & DD are going to stay with ILs this weekend whilst I'm away. I was going to stay but DH wouldn't hear of it.

MIL had heart attack several years ago but is otherwise in good health. SIL turned up at FIL's office and told him that DH was signing his mother's death warrant by coming to stay and that he and other SIL were completely uncaring by allowing it. Left the office in floods of tears but hasn't said anything directly to us.

Is that OTT or should I be insisting on us all staying at home? (ILs are very keen for DH & DD to stay)

OP posts:

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Doodle2u · 23/07/2009 22:21

The advice is to stay at home until everyone is clear.

It is an OTT ting to say though - your MIL could get on a bus and catch swine flu....therefore, are bus journeys or a quick trip to the library cosidered walks of death?

Ponders · 23/07/2009 22:24

Well yes, your SIL is being OTT, but OTOH imagine how you all would feel if MIL did get swine flu following a visit from DH & DD!

Granted, as doodle says, she could catch it anywhere, but if they go to stay you & DH will always feel responsible...can they not postpone the visit until they are out of the contagious period?

2rebecca · 23/07/2009 22:26

Stay at home.

spiralqueen · 23/07/2009 23:06

GP says he is no longer contagious. MIL works in a supermarket so is mixing with people all the time.

OP posts:

PeedOffWithNits · 23/07/2009 23:36

MIL could catch it anywhere then, she must meet 100s of people at work, and handle their money etc

those who protest are probably anxious about her being higher risk/frail, but if you are symptom free, go

shonaspurtle · 23/07/2009 23:40

It's up to MIL imo.

TrillianslebAstra · 23/07/2009 23:41

It's OTT to say that of course but you shouldn't really go visit people if you have flu. Even if they really want you to. Can't he visit in a couple of weeks instead?

Northernlurker · 23/07/2009 23:44

Your sil has a very bad case of media hysteria. It's probably best that you all keep away from her in case you become infected and decide your husband with the MILD VIRAL ILLNESS is the Angel of Death too.

fleacircus · 23/07/2009 23:47

ILs are adults, presumably therefore capable of assessing and accepting risks. If they're happy, there's no problem. SIL sounds bonkers.

SparklyGothKat · 23/07/2009 23:48

so how long ago was your DH taken ill, is he showing any signs now?

2rebecca · 24/07/2009 10:15

If GP says he's no longer infectious then I don't see the problem and she's over-reacting. Tell ILs the facts and let them decide. Once you're over flu you're over flu and no longer infectious, same as most other infections.

Fairynufff · 24/07/2009 10:26

SIL is just worried about her mum. It is hysteria but people have died, are going to die and who can blame someone for worrying about their own mother's health? The family should postpone it to another weekend until everyone is clear and things have settled.

Chluro · 24/07/2009 10:31

Official advice is to stay at home, avoiding as many people as possible for two whole weeks. If your MIL is classed as having underlying health issues (which a mild heart attack some time ago may not necessarily indicate) then steer clear.

SouthMum · 24/07/2009 10:34

If he is still ill I'd say steer clear of anyone.

I think there is alot of hysteria surrounding swine flu but I can't help but think this is how it is rapidly spreading - by people not erring on the side of caution and staying at home until they are completely over it.

spiralqueen · 24/07/2009 10:37

DH taken ill a week ago so with 2 days before showing symptoms and 5 days after he ceased being infectious on Wednesday. It's spread by airborne transmission and he's not been coughing or sneezing and hasn't had a sore throat or a runny nose. Nobody he had close contact with during the infectious phase has come down with it.

MIL is more than happy to have a visit.

OP posts:

Noonki · 24/07/2009 10:45

in that case yanbu. but get MIL to explain it to SIL.

OrmIrian · 24/07/2009 10:46

I would stay away tbh. My parents are in their late 70s and neither of them in perfect health - dad has a heart condition. I would very much prefer that no-one with swine flu goes near them.

However I think your SIL is being a trifle melodramatic and in the end it depends on your MIL.

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