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DP will not attend my barbecue because he takes himself too seriously!?!?!

(15 Posts)
lilacclaire Thu 23-Jul-09 19:27:36

Basically im going to have a barbecue at our house for my college friends as we never got a night out when we finished up.

DP has said that if I do, he will not be there as we will all be drinking and he could end up being a manager to some of them next year (same line of work and quite possible).

I think he is taking himself far too seriously and should be able to still manage people effectively that he has socialized with.

DP does take his job very seriously, but why tf should I have to curtail my social life (this is the wildest it gets) because he has his head so far up his own arse.

I don't think he wants 'staff' gossiping or even discussing/mentioning our 'private life' ffs, we're not going to be having sex in front of them!

So aibu in expecting him to be there or is he bu.

cocolepew Thu 23-Jul-09 19:29:06

Tell him to take the stick out of his arse. YANBU.

ineedalifelaundry Thu 23-Jul-09 19:31:21

Crikey, he needs to seriously lighten up! yanbu, he is.

allaboutme Thu 23-Jul-09 19:32:02

he probably just doesnt like your friends and cant be arsed with the bbq
no one could honestly refuse to go 'just in case' he ends up working with them at some unknown point in the future and that would make him feel awkward having previously attended a bbq togeher

god forbid anyone actually at his work invites him to a bbq - what would he do, explode?

flaminhell Thu 23-Jul-09 19:35:40

oh leave him to it and have your little do without him.

AmazingBouncingFerret Thu 23-Jul-09 19:35:44

What does he do on the annual Christmas do?!

cthea Thu 23-Jul-09 19:35:52

Is he always so much fun?

Lilyloo Thu 23-Jul-09 19:37:48

yadnbu fgs he seriously needs to lighten up

PerArduaAdNauseum Thu 23-Jul-09 19:41:03

If anyone's likely to get screaming drunk and wear their knickers on their heads then YABU. Otherwise YANBU. Good enough?

roneef Thu 23-Jul-09 19:49:54


He doesn't have to join your friends.

As long as you have a good time, who cares if he's there?

Some people are more reserved than others.

I know I don't like certain people to get too close for comfort

I can be a bit antisocial


FabBakerGirlIsBack Thu 23-Jul-09 19:51:25

No one is asking you to curtail your social life. hmm

He just doesn't want to be there.

lilacclaire Thu 23-Jul-09 20:26:20

Thanks for all the responses, he's just called to say that he will be there and be the host with the most! (oh and he said, you 'can' have the barby, I told him I was anyway!!)
I told him I was glad he took the big stick out his bum.
We had a laugh about it and I said I kind of understood him to a point....

mayorquimby Fri 24-Jul-09 09:47:54

yabu, he's not trying to curtail your social life, he's curtailing his own by not attending.
if he was trying to stop you then fair enough, but he's not, so let him bugger off on his own and have fun with your friends.
also i'd imagine a party where you are the only one who is nbot from a certain group i.e. college friends could be a bit boring because everyone else there has something in common and knows everyone else.

just enjoy yourself without him, and it means you can concentrate on having a good time without worrying about wether or not he's getting on with people etc.

MitchyInge Fri 24-Jul-09 09:52:15


work and social interaction go hand in hand - if he seriously thinks he might end up managing some of these people wouldn't it be good for him to get to know them a bit first?

he is being silly and rude

prettyfly1 Fri 24-Jul-09 10:37:22

oh lord how stuck up his own butt - he should take the opportunity to get to know people outside of work and appear as human - people will still respect him as a manager but probably like him more for it - although if he is always this stuck up perhaps not.

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