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To make a point of not reading DSD's report?

(19 Posts)
MsWhite Thu 16-Jul-09 11:52:45

I know I am being childish but ...

My son brought home an excellent school report last week. I was really pleased with it and asked DP if he'd like to read it. He replied "I might have a quick look later" hmm

Needless to say, he never did.

However, when his dd's report arrived this morning, first thing he said was "Oh look! DD's report has arrived! do you want to read it?"


So I said "maybe later".

He's since gone out and of course, I have read it.

But I feel pissed off with the way he rubished my son's report yet throws his DD's in my face as if it's so much more important.

Therefore I have replaced the report back where he left it and will make out that I've not got around to reading it.

Am I being "too" childish here? if so, how else should I make the point?

HecatesTwopenceworth Thu 16-Jul-09 11:55:58

yes you are.

You should talk to him. Tell him that you were hurt by his lack of interest. And how he was excited to share his daughter's report with you does he not see that that was the same excitement you felt - but he didn't care.

DrunkenDaisy Thu 16-Jul-09 12:02:04

Think of all the ways your DS is better/clever than his DD and rub his face in it. joke.

imaynotbeperfectbutimokmummy Thu 16-Jul-09 12:48:13

I think it is quite worrying that your DP shows no interest in your son tbh. This is a big deal imo

Haribosmummy Thu 16-Jul-09 12:58:15

Hang on....

Your DS's report arrived: YOU read it, asked your OH to read it, he declined.

Your DSD's report arrived: OH read it, asked you to read it, you declined....

Your OH didn't react differently to YOUR reaction to his child than he did in HIS reaction to your child.

Is your OH DS's father? I am guessing not, but if he is, then yes, I'd be a bit
miffed about it.

randomtask Thu 16-Jul-09 13:00:34

I agree it's worrying he's not interested and doesn't seem to be 'equal' about it.

Rise above it, discuss the report with DSD and congratulate her as you would DS.

Then talk to DP and explain that you are concerned you are more of a step parent than him. Ask him how he'd like you to behave with DSD and explain that's how you'd like him to be with DS.

But then I'm a step parent and constantly worry about being equal and giving the same amoun of love (even though DH tells me I already am, I think it's just a worry that I'll always have).

Lancelottie Thu 16-Jul-09 13:16:12

Maybe he just thinks, 'Oh, school reports. MsWhite obviously gets all excited about those. She'll like this one.'

...based on my DH's lack of joy at the sight of any communication from school.

katiestar Thu 16-Jul-09 15:16:57

Why are you doing this pathetic point scoring shit ?

OrmIrian Thu 16-Jul-09 15:18:44

Yes you are being too childish.

RumourOfAHurricane Thu 16-Jul-09 15:19:07

Message withdrawn

Silver1 Thu 16-Jul-09 16:16:15

I am with imaynotbeperfectbutimokmummy
Yes you are BU- perhaps lead by example??

zeke Thu 16-Jul-09 16:20:23

when he gets back - pretend you forgot but are excited to read it now and at the same time hand him your son's.
If he behaves in a suitable manner I would brush off the earlier lack of interest as being preoccupied with somehing. If he still isn't interested then you really need to talk about this.

LuluMaman Thu 16-Jul-09 16:23:15

instead of being childish and point scoring, you need to TALK!

if this is one of many ways though , that he demonstrates total amibvalence and lack of interest in your DS, then that is serious and needs sorting out

do you live together with the children? if so, they are going to notice if one is treated radically differently to the other

LuluMaman Thu 16-Jul-09 16:23:43

reading it and then making it look like you have not read it makes you just as daft as him

HerBeatitude Thu 16-Jul-09 16:24:03

Yes I think YABU.

This sort of thing really needs to be sorted out in an adult manner and tit for tat isn't adult behaviour.

I'd be pissed off too btw. And worried.

sleeplessinstretford Thu 16-Jul-09 16:34:25

FFS-why would you even think it's ok to behave like that? Either of you?
who is who's parent/step? is there more to this than meets the eye OP?

Grandhighpoohba Thu 16-Jul-09 16:41:01

maybe he meant to read it and forgot?

junglist1 Thu 16-Jul-09 17:41:18

Yes it's childish. But he started it.

mumeeee Thu 16-Jul-09 17:46:55

You are being very childish. He might have just forgotten and will read it if you remind him.

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