to get annoyed when people are determined they are right

[randomtask]

even when there's evidence they aren't?!

My colleague's wife is a primary school teacher, my DH has just qualified as a NQT (newly qualified teacher) in Secondary Schools. Colleague has for most of the year been telling me how I'll never see DH as his wife goes to work at 7.30am and comes back at 6pm, then works from 7.30 to 10.30 every night and on Saturday mornings. My DH (admittedly training) got himself quite organised and so although I know it won't be easy, I hope it won't be that bad.

Colleague just mentioned this again and I said that DH was quite good for the last year. His response was that for an NQT he'll 'be watched' so would be working all hours and stressed (implying everybody is the same). I explained that although an NQT, as DH used to teach in Uni's (he only did PGCE so he could teach in schools) he'll be technically an NQT but is teaching A-Levels and classed as a more experienced teacher (with related pay). Colleague told me there must have 'been a fiddle' as the school can't do that as it's the county council that pay him.

Now I know that DH didn't ask for the level of pay and is totally unaware of a 'fiddle' as he was suprised when they told him what he'd be paid. Colleague still determined this is impossible (incidentally I know some of DH's peers have requested higher classification and succeeded).

So, AIBU to find this annoying? I probably am and should just let it go but I'm tempted to be childish and come in with his contract tomorrow to prove colleague wrong!!

[McSnail]

Not really unreasonable. Don't know what the system's like down south for teachers, but in Scotland you can be pushed up the pay-scale if you have requisite experience.

Oh, and as an aside - your husband will probably find that a lot of teachers try to out-do each other with regards to how many hours they work! It's a nark of the job, I find...

[HecatesTwopenceworth]

Oh I find a very snooty "I don't know why you think I would lie about something so trivial, I'm sure." with a look works quite well.

[snigger]

I think Hecate's look is definitely in order.

Just sigh and say "Oh yes, it's going to be horrible, I'll be boring the pants off you for the coming year".

Cue tumbleweed.

[MummyDragon]

Nope, YANBU at all - some people are like that though, aren't they? - they just keep coming right back atcha with a machine-gun volley of smug answers ... I guess you've just got to feel sorry for your colleague's wife - she works awfully long hours AND she has to live with a smart*rse

[babyignoramus]

Most council jobs are on a scale - so when employed you will given wages between £x and £Y depending on experience etc. So not a fiddle but most likely he's gone in further up the scale the your colleague's wife did.

[TheFallenMadonna]

It's not a fiddle at all. I also went into teaching on a higher point than most NQTs.

My FIL told me it teacher's pay was related to age. I said no, experience (as it was at the time). He said I had it wrong. I maintained I was right. He said "well, so-and-so's son is a teacher, and she said...". I reminded him that I was a teacher, and aware of the payscales. He absolutely refused to accept I was wrong .

However... your colleague may have a point when it comes to working hours. Sorry.

[TheFallenMadonna]

he was wrong.

I was of course right

[randomtask]

I knew that I don't know a lot about teaching, but I also knew it wasn't a fiddle. Just bugs me when people are like that but then I think he's hoping my DH works as hard as his wife so it's not just him!

I know it is bad with working hours but DH lesson plans quickly (he thinks for a while but the written stuff is quick) and he's quite good at marking in front of the TV. Not necessarily a good thing but if he can do it when he's training I reckon he'll be fine. At the beginning of last year it was hell but he's got the hang of it. Next step is full time. He's been very good at making use of free lessons at school.

We only got married last year (he started training on the day we got back from honeymoon) so in some ways, it's all I've known anyway!

I shall practice my look for tomorrow....

[Qally]

God, if he were my husband I'd work those kinds of hours too.