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To get annoyed at people moaning about crying kids at the supermarket?

(82 Posts)
mysonben Tue 30-Jun-09 00:40:40

Well i work on checkouts at a superstore, more often than not i can hear a toddler somewhere in the queue at the checkouts having a fit, a tantrum , a cry ... whatever you may call it.
And more often than not some grumpy sod will make a annoyed comment about it! Such as " i would have smacked that kid by now if it was mine!"
shock

qwertpoiuy Tue 30-Jun-09 03:48:22

Thank goodness smacking is socially acceptable now- a smack is definitely not going to do a bored, hungry child any good.

I can't stand when people moan about these children! If I hear a toddler cry while shopping my emotions are as follows
1. Relief that I'm not the parent that has to deal with it
2. Pity for the parent because I remember what it's like!

I just don't understand why it bothers those people.

Qally Tue 30-Jun-09 04:23:47

People are obnoxious sometimes - where do they imagine people spring from, fully grown? Who fills the shelves, mans the checkouts, flies the planes and drives the buses, if the world is purged of toddlers?

I've been checking the Times travel sections on Sunday for cheap flight deals, and every time they have a piece on flying with babies a slew of pompous tossers people start tut tutting about how selfish and thoughtless it is of parents to fly anywhere with their kids at any time until they are old enough to vote. Because parents should suffer for their crimes by living in purdah, away from normal, sane, non-reproducing people. (You do occasionally get the odd parent insisting that they never flew because they were just a better parent than anyone else, ever, they just stayed at home for their hols and shared a guttering candle and a monopoly board with half the pieces instead.)

I do actually have some sympathy for the poor sods who'll be stuck next to us and our baby on the flight to Australia, though, so I am fervently hoping they're one of the whiners. grin

Ozziegirly Tue 30-Jun-09 05:15:09

Qally I agree - have you seen the comment saying something along the lines of "anyone subjecting their child to decompression in their ears is an abusive parent and should have their child taken away" ?

Bonkers old loon.

I love having children near me on flights as it gives me the opportunity to unleash my full selection of "funny" faces and also my boredom threshold for "peek a boo" with tiny ones is pretty much limitless.

chefswife Tue 30-Jun-09 05:24:57

next time i hear an old sod saying 'if that was my kid, i'd have smacked him by now', i'm going to say, 'if my grandpa ever said something like that, i'd have smacked him by now'.

ninedragons Tue 30-Jun-09 05:31:25

One of my favourite stories comes from a very good friend of mine who was flying long-haul with two kids under four. The very young woman in the next seat looked up as she wrangled them into their seats and said "Gosh, that looks like hard work, what would you like me to do?" She entertained the kids, held the meal trays so they could get in and out, minded each kid while my friend took the other one to the loo.

She worked for a charity, and didn't know that my friend was in charge of administering the charitable budget of a global investment bank. The day my friend got back to work, the woman's charity got a stonking big sponsorship cheque from my friend's bank, and the woman got a huge bunch of flowers delivered to her office.

Expectant Tue 30-Jun-09 05:36:04

Ozziegirly please let us know when you're flying next so we can be sure that we get a seat next to you - I warn you though DS boredom threshhold for peek a boo is also limitless grin

Triggles Tue 30-Jun-09 05:39:00

When shopping recently with my 2yo, who was fussing in the child seat of the shopping trolley, a woman walked up to him, patted him on the head, and said "you poor dear, you must be tired and need a nap - what was your mummy thinking, dragging you here when you're so tired?" angry So I informed her "he JUST got up from a 2 hr nap about 15-20 minutes ago, so he is most certainly NOT tired. He just doesn't want to be grocery shopping. Since I'm sure at some point he'll want his tea, he's just going to have to deal with it, as I needed groceries."

I've had a couple people give the commiserating smile with the "god, I've been there" comment, which I usually just smile back, as it doesn't offend - haven't we all been there at some point?

Blackduck Tue 30-Jun-09 07:29:41

Was wheeling ds round a supermarket when he was about 2 and he was screaming when some old git got down on his level shoved his face in ds's face and screamed at him.... I was so shock I did nothing - now I'd have given him what for....

Confuzzeled Tue 30-Jun-09 07:50:37

I'm also shocked at how people forget that all toddlers and babies cry and quite often have tantrums.

It's usually the people who complain about crying kids who also complain that kids are spoilt and should be told off. I was at the supermarket last week with my Dad, dd was playing up and he was just giving her treats to keep her quiet. She quite cleverly then screamed to get a sweet off him. He then said she was rather spoilt when we got home, wtf did he expect.

Blackduck, I can't believe someone screamed at your ds, thats shocking.

Bucharest Tue 30-Jun-09 07:54:18

YANBU at all.....I get the urge to scream at the offending oldies about their grandchildren....who I presume have never cried in their whole lives....yeah right.

BellaBear Tue 30-Jun-09 08:02:42

ninedragons, what a fantastic story!

BalloonSlayer Tue 30-Jun-09 08:08:44

I'd have thought it's entirely natural for a toddler to scream and have tantrums at the supermarket.

The place is full of brightly coloured things all designed to catch the eye and look attractive.

Plus there are the "merchandisey" things specially designed to catch a toddler's eye - Thomas Spaghetti Hoops for example.

Surely any child is going to desperately want at least 20 things on the way round. And I often think it's easier to say "no" in a supermarket than in, say, a gift shop on a day out that you just popped into and now wish you hadn't.

So let em scream and tantrum away, as far as I'm concerned - it's a big open space and the sound gets dispersed - they've got to learn they can't have everything one day.

booyhoo Tue 30-Jun-09 10:39:23

just last week i did my first grocery trip with both ds'. previously i had only had one of them with me as ds2 is just a month old. anyway, ds2 was crying in the trolley and this old lady came over and said to my 3 year old ds1 " are you not looking after your brother properly? he's crying."

i was raging, ow dare she put that on my 3 year old, its hard enough for him adjusting to a new baby without being made to feel responsile for upsetting him (which of course he hadnt done).

lljkk Tue 30-Jun-09 10:44:16

Little babies crying in public places bothers me a lot. It's a hormonal thing and it upsets me hugely; they're so full-throated sincere about it. That's not a go at the parents of little babies, just something I find hard to take!

Toddlers can scream all they like as long as it's not MY toddler I can tune it out completely.

Nekabu Tue 30-Jun-09 10:54:04

Screaming and then stopping is one thing but when they are on a marathon shriekathon and the parents don't do anything to stop them, it does annoy me. I don't see why everyone has to listen to children shrieking non-stop. I wouldn't like shopping with an adult going round screaming and yelling at the top of their voice either. I don't think anyone expects a librarian hush in a supermarket but it doesn't have to be a deafening howl either!

PinkTulips Tue 30-Jun-09 10:56:04

wow... some of these stories are shocking shock

i'm lucky in that the worst i've ever gotton is a nasty look... and i've had far more people come up to me and make supportive comments or try and distract said tantrumming child for me.

that said mine have never realy tantrumed much in public... they very swiftly moved past that stage to the 'lets set off the alarms/press all these buttons/throw this tomato across the shop/knock down this shelf' stage hmmsad now that makes you bloody unpopular in supermarkets!

LaurieFairyCake Tue 30-Jun-09 10:57:31

but surely you can't stop a screaming toddler hmm

unless you leave the supermarket and leave your shopping.

Nekabu Tue 30-Jun-09 10:58:01

I love ninedragons story though!

slng Tue 30-Jun-09 10:58:34

I always think that it's probably the supermarket's job to make money by putting "merchandise" at toddler eye level, and it's my job NOT to give in all the time. Everyone else will just have to put up with it and if they hate the noise so much maybe they can try to convince the supermarkets to stop trying to push all this nonsense at defenceless little children.

Nekabu Tue 30-Jun-09 10:59:49

Leave the supermarket then. Plonk your trolly by customer care and ask them to look after it and go outside until the child stops. A friend did that with hers and it worked very well.

pagwatch Tue 30-Jun-09 11:01:54

I have told this story before but hey...

I was in supermarket with DS2 ( who has SN) who was struggling and upset so crying.

Old lady : that child needs a slap

End of tether Pagwatch : <<excited>> You're right! I know, I'll hold him - you beat the shit out of him. Come on...

Old lady exits stage left
Other shoppers edge away from Pag nervously.

Nekabu Tue 30-Jun-09 11:05:12

It is shocking the number of people who've said that the child needs a slap. I can only presume they don't mean it but it seems a great pity they feel the urge to say it in the first place.

PrincessToadstool Tue 30-Jun-09 11:05:51

Nekabu, please share with us your strategies for stopping a shrieking toddler then.

And leaving doesn't count, because in this scenario it's 4.30 p and you're in a hurry, got to collect your DH after this and then go home and make dinner.

Nekabu Tue 30-Jun-09 11:16:50

I'd try to choose a time to go to the supermarket when I wasn't in such a rush or I'd be late to collect my DH. I know toddlers have tantrums and can shriek like mad, I'm not daft but I see plenty of people who do then have a good go at stopping their child doing it - whether it's via distraction, comfort, or removing it from the shop.

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