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To not add my mother as a friend on Facebook?

(13 Posts)
Delirium Thu 25-Jun-09 07:54:59

She has just set up an account and was talking to me about how friend suggestions work. I explained and then said, "I'm not going to add you, you know," and she said, "I wasn't going to ask - I couldn't handle the rejection."

Bearing in mind she has already stalked found me on here, which is why I namechange so often and don't really post anymore (she'll probably still see this - hi mum!) AIBU to want a bit of online privacy?

Delirium Thu 25-Jun-09 09:30:20

Self-serving bump

morningpaper Thu 25-Jun-09 09:31:49

YANBU but you might have to do it anyway

The best thing to do is to set her up so she only sees your limited profile i.e. not your wall or anything interesting

It will be worth doing that pronto because otherwise she will be a total nightmare and make inappropriate comments every time your friends post anything and try to make friends with men you used to sleep with hmm

Delirium Thu 25-Jun-09 09:35:16

She'll still see my status updates though, won't she?

It was more the "rejection" comment that got my back up tbh!!

morningpaper Thu 25-Jun-09 09:36:17

No you can add status updates to things she can't see

You can make your limited profile VERY limited

then if she ever asks just look vague and say you don't really use it

she'll never know

Bleatblurt Thu 25-Jun-09 09:36:24

I refuse to add any or my family.

I don't even let my mum know what sites I used (so just say 'parenting site' when talking about something I read on here) as I know she's come on here to nosy about and try to find me.

I do not need family knowing I have tried bumsex or that DH has a tights fetish. wink

You are definitely NBU.

Delirium Thu 25-Jun-09 11:50:11

Butterball - i didn't exactly tell my mum I used MN. I used to use her computer and she just looked on the history!

Limited profile sounds like a plan. Trouble is, she'll know now, cause I've put it on here!! I should move to a different forum but I like it here.

GentlyDidIt Thu 25-Jun-09 15:54:04

Facebook has worked out really well for me with family. They are all very keen on maintaining an appearance of being wonderfully supportive and involved with each other, so I can post inane stuff about what I've had for tea and they all reply publicly with things like "Well done!" and "You're great!", whilst continuing to ignore me in real life.

Everyone thinks they are getting all my latest news when in fact, anything really important never goes on there (or at least not until it's very old news anyway).

The arrangement suits all of us really well grin

bleh Thu 25-Jun-09 15:57:12

YANBU. I refused to add my DM when she suggested it (fortunately, she hasn't figured out how to use FB, so I'm safe for now). My Dad on the other hand, and subsequently family friends of my Dad's age, added me, all my siblings in sibling in laws had added him, so it would have looked bad if I didn't.

I went for VERY limited status for him and his friends (why?!) so they can see my pictures, but not pictures friends have tagged me in, status updates, wall posts, and so on.

mollyroger Thu 25-Jun-09 15:57:53

I had this a while ago. She still makes digs at me.....I stod my ground!

MP, was it you who was being ver very amusing and emoting with me about it?

LollipopViolet Thu 25-Jun-09 20:36:53

I've got my mum on FB (I'm 19 and live at home!) and she is so naughty, posting all sorts of v funny notes and things. She has added 1 or 2 of my mates, and even one of their mums (but so have I), and she did put all my baby pics up....

But, I don't mind, I've got nothing to hide.

If I was older however, it'd annoy me!

Seabright Thu 25-Jun-09 21:46:03

Add her, with a really limited profile, then quietly delete her later when the novelty has worn off for her.

If you delete a friend they're not told so she'll probably never notice (unless she's Norma-No-Mates and only has 2 facebook friends)

thirtysomething Thu 25-Jun-09 21:54:57

Seabright great idea - I have same problem, my Mum has requested that I add her as a facebook friend and I felt really angry about this - she has minimal interest in my daily life other than the occasional bit of news so I object to her seeing my status updates. if she wants to know how I am she can phone me?

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