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AIBU (and childish) to block their drive if they block mine?

(42 Posts)
daisy5678 Wed 24-Jun-09 20:02:33

I live on a modern housing estate where the rules in the deeds say you can't park on the road if it will obstruct the road(but people do, because there are no lines or signs).

The couple over the road have a garage, driveway and 2 cars. I imagine their garage is full of crap like mine, so they don't use it. Wife parks on the drive; husband parks outside the house, on the road, opposite my drive. He doesn't even slightly park on the pavement, so there is very little room.

When I go to work,I have a choice of reversing into his car or scratching my (quite new) car on the hedge in the effort not to, in order to get out. I can't reverse in in the evenings because his car is there and there is no room.

I have asked him. And asked him. And asked him. Really, really politely. I've said he can park outside my house (the bit next to the drive). I've suggested that he parks outside his drive (further down, not blocking anyone's drive). He won't move. I totally accept that he doesn't have to, but why would you not if it's easy????

My son, who is autistic, is getting more and more stressed about it. He hates the fact that I keep having to take ages to get out in the morning and panics about being late. I shouldn't need to!

So today, after a huge crying fit from my son, I saw red. I have now parked on his side of the road, outside his house, not blocking his drive but making it very very difficult for them to get out easily. I'm hoping that this will make my point: if they won't be nice, nor will I. I am just so mortified by my childishness, but at the same time, being adult hasn't worked and legally there's nothing I can do.

AIBU?

hullygully Wed 24-Jun-09 20:03:54

No. Have you tried talking to the woman?

meemarsgotabrandnewbump Wed 24-Jun-09 20:04:59

No YANBU, you've tried politely asking, now you are showing him how it feels.

He sounds like a nob.

daisy5678 Wed 24-Jun-09 20:05:41

No, I never see her, just him. It's also not her blocking my drive, so I guess I would feel odd saying it to her. I'm hoping she'll come and ask me to move my car if I'm blocking their drive and then I might be able to.

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Wed 24-Jun-09 20:05:41

Message withdrawn

Hassled Wed 24-Jun-09 20:06:31

Yes, childish. But you've asked nicely, he's being a git - what else could you possibly have done ?

daisy5678 Wed 24-Jun-09 20:06:33

Oh, forgot to mention, a fire engine couldn't get down the street the other day because he was parked there shock

I am glad that I'm not mad!

hullygully Wed 24-Jun-09 20:06:49

I would talk to her in an effort to avoid some mad feud and unpleasantness.

Blu Wed 24-Jun-09 20:09:25

Talking to the woman may pay off - have you explained about your ds's difficulty with waiting? (although such a self-centred nob is unlikely to be sympathetic)

If you have a Blue badge maybe you could approach the council to create a disabled space outside your house - or across the road, so that HE can't park in it?

Or approach the council to create road markings?

You can park where you like on a public road (where legal) so no, parking in a place near his drive not unreasonable or childish wink

EccentricaGallumbits Wed 24-Jun-09 20:09:39

have you tried knocking on his door every time you need to get in or out of our drive? would he not soon get tired of it.

but No YANBU. if it makes it easier for you to get your car in and out of the street park wherever.

Blondeshavemorefun Wed 24-Jun-09 20:11:28

annoying i agree, but your neighbour isnt parking where he isnt allowed or there would be white lines there to stop him

why dont you park by your drive(where you suggested he park)

its good he doesnt park on the pavement as tbh that really pisses me off when i cant get through with a buggy or our neighbour up the road is in a wheelchair and it pisses him off when he cant get past our house if the twatish neighbour of our otherside parks on pavement

tbh if he isnt blocking your drive as such,then he isnt in the wrong

sounds that your road is quite narrow, i have my neighbours parking opposite our house and dh sometimes finds it hard to reverse out but manages it

Blu Wed 24-Jun-09 20:11:54

Oh, if emergency services can't get thorugh, definitley call council.

Or helpfully inform him that if Fire Engines need access they are authorised to crush vehicles which impede. I am sure I read that somewhere. Best check first, I suppose!

Blu Wed 24-Jun-09 20:12:42

I agree parking on pavement not acceptable.

warthog Wed 24-Jun-09 20:13:54

i would ask the council to put down road markings.

but i think you've made your point. he's being completely unreasonable!

Kimi Wed 24-Jun-09 20:18:55

YANBU

I would have keyed his car by now

daisy5678 Wed 24-Jun-09 20:20:50

Can't get disabled space, though do have blue badge, as we have a parking space, on our drive (albeit pretty unuseable angry )

The lines thing is worth asking about, definitely. It's far too narrow and bendy a road for people to park - which, technically, people could do on both sides! He is the only person on the whole estate who parks on the road. Everybody else has hugely long drives, has only one car, or uses their garage. Like I say, the deeds lease thing states no parking on the road, but I don't even know if we're all with the same lease company, iykwim?

I will try and engineer a talk with the woman. But am guessing he's told her about it and so she's unlikely to persuade him to change his mind just cos I ask her to.

Or I will park by my drive, where I said he should, but that will probably invalidate my insurance as it's supposed to be parked on the drive. I just don't get why he's being sooooo arsey! Why would someone do that for no reason, when it won't inconvenience him at all or others at all if he moves down a bit on his side?

Grr. Thanks all for ideas!

Such a little annoyance compared to most things, but it gets me cross from the moment I wake up, knowing what's ahead when I try to leave the house!

stillstanding Wed 24-Jun-09 20:25:11

Probably you are not being entirely reasonable but I would do it too! That sort of thing would drive me MAD. And it's not like he's the paragon of reasonablesness either!

BigMomma3 Wed 24-Jun-09 20:29:43

YANBU we used to have the exact same situation as you in a previous house (house opposite had a double width drive but had a caravan parked in it so they used to park across our drive and it was a nightmare getting out). My husband very politely asked one day if they could park a metre or so further down and he was called a 'wanker' by the wife in front of our DD and their kids shock. I still feel infuriated by that 5 years later and this was in an affluent area and these people used to look down their noses at us because our cars were older than theirs!!

DH would have liked to do the same as you but we always got home after them. So park there cos some people are ignorant pigs and could'nt give a toss about anyone else, inconvenience him for a bit!!

Grendle Wed 24-Jun-09 20:34:52

Don't start a feud. You have to live there! Even if you come to sell you will have to declare any disputes with neighbours, which could affect a sale.

I totally sympathise, as a similar parking issue was one factor in us selling a former house. I'd never choose an estate like that again. Unfortunately, I don't know what a sensible answer is sad. Is the road private? If so try contacting the management company. If all the residents except one are in agreement then it's possible they may be able to enforce the terms in the lease/deeds.

Lizzylou Wed 24-Jun-09 20:35:04

YANBU
That is so selfish of him, stick to your guns.

We are on a modern estate where some people are so selfish when it comes to parking.

We have one neighbour farther down who is in the middle of an argument with their next door neighbours who delights in setting up a swingball, leaving his bins and even a bench, on his drive. Then parks in the road, and leaves a trailer on the road too. hey have space for at least 2 cars on their drive and a double garage, but don't use it.
Many a time when drunk angry I've said I'm going to go and have a word, but he is a nasty bastard (calls police, tries to poison neighbours dog etc etc) so I chicken out. You couldn't get a fire engine down our road atm.

fucksticks Wed 24-Jun-09 20:39:38

He's being an utter utter arse and I dont blame you for doing it. I probably would too.
BUT it could be the start of a big neighbour feud that could go on and on and escalate.

Can you write a very polite letter addressed to the wife (or if you dont know her name then try and put the letter through the door while he is out so she gets it)
Saying please please can they park slightly further down which shouldnt make any difference to them, but will make a massive difference to you. Tell them that your car is getting scratched, your DS has special needs and is getting very distressed and its all becoming very upsetting for you.
Say you'd reached the end of your tether today and parked over their drive in response but you dont want things to escalate and become unpleasant so are apologising for that and hope you can start again with them parking elsewhere.

If it doesnt work, then park over their drive every day!

Nahui Wed 24-Jun-09 20:47:11

Message withdrawn

pippylongstockings Wed 24-Jun-09 21:07:55

Not that it helps but I think it's a wierd british male thing regarding parking rights.

Our neighbour who to our face is a 'normal' man - park's in front of his house come hell or high water. He will block in neighbours cars parking millimetres from their bumper, he will dash out of his house to move his car into 'his' space. Even when we had a toddler and I was 9 months pregnant there was no let up.

We now encourage friends and relatives to park there just to irk him whenever we can!

bohemianbint Wed 24-Jun-09 21:11:56

He's not going to come banging on your door at a stupid hour though is he? (But YANBU grin)

tigerdriver Wed 24-Jun-09 21:19:18

YANBU at all. On the insurance thing, it MIGHT not cost much more at all if anything to change it to parking outside house on road. If there's not much difference then I'd change it so that your insurance is ok. Agree you shouldn't have to do it, but if that makes life easier while you're sorting this out....

And the guy is a total plonker, of course grin

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