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AIBU?

to complain about either/both of these issues with DDs teacher.? (sorry long)

53 replies

katiestar · 23/06/2009 23:37

The first one is that her class are in a portacabin on the school field.It is SO HOT.My DD had what seemed to be a water infection last Thursday and I told her teacher that I was taking her to the doctor to get an antibiotic but I wanted her to drink plenty of water.Anyway they had an hours PE lesson and soon after they got out and started running about DD asked if she could have a drink.The teacher said no the rule is that they can only have a drink at playtime.
Anyway last night her waterworks seemed to be no better and she was getting twinges in her kidney I made another doctors appointment and told the teacher all about her symptoms and said she needed to drink plenty.
When I went to pick her up it was just like a wall.DD looked really pale ,her lips were dried and cracked and she was in much more pain from her kidney.
She downed nearly a pint of water 'in ome'.The doctor diagnosed a kidney infection at once and she has given her another antibiotic.She commented on how dehydrated DD seemed .
I don't think it is reasonable to expect a child to wait until the next playtime for a drink in hot weather -let alone a child who has a UTI.I really don't want to send her tomorrow
The second thing is a boy who is her cousin , is raelly rough to her at school.Today he chased after her and stung her arm with a nettle (held in a leaf.When she showed the teacher she said 'please don't sting people X'That was it.Its not the first time he has stung her and last week he bounced a basket pall on her head and threw a stone at her.He is always telling her he hates her too.Again AIBU to expect there to be a consequence to deliberately stinging a child ? DD is 7 BTW

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cornsilk · 23/06/2009 23:39

That's a very silly rule about drinks.

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lockets · 23/06/2009 23:42

This reply has been deleted

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blinder · 23/06/2009 23:44

I think she should stay home tomorrow. I agree that she should be having lots of fluids but that home is probably the best place for that to happen - where you can monitor it yourself. Teachers, unfortunately don't get the time or space to care for a sick child, making me lean towards YABU.

Hope she feels better soon .

But the bullying definitely needs dealing with. I'd approach the head about it tbh.

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KingCanuteIAm · 23/06/2009 23:45

The drinks thing is against current guidelines for primary aged children, how old is she?

Research it, print off the relevant info, take it to the teacher and tell her that, if things do not improve, you will be writing to the headteacher, the LEA and the govenors with the same information.

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MrsWeasley · 23/06/2009 23:46

I would write a note explaining that DD needs to have access to drinking water at all times as the GP had noted how dehydrated. Also send DD in with a water bottle as request that she keeps this with her.

I would certainly mention the behavior of the little boy too. Maybe keep a note of the the dates and type of incidents with him and ask to see the teacher or the head if things dont improve.

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katiestar · 23/06/2009 23:46

Not asking her to CARE for her Blinder just ALLOW her (and all the other hot thirsty childrenO to have a drink when they need one !

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treedelivery · 23/06/2009 23:48

I think she should stay home, and I think water should be easily reached for all learners. Dehydration affects brain function.

I taught a bit of English on S. Korea and the kids could get water whenever they wanted. They didn't abuse it as it was in corner of classroom under my beady eye. The 1st 5 mins of break was a line up at the fountain and everyone had a mouthfull.

On other hand teachers can't police this stuff if this sort of thing isn't in place, so it's tricky.

The 2nd issue clearly needs sorting.

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KingCanuteIAm · 23/06/2009 23:48

Sorry, the current advice is that primary aged children should have water available to them throughout the day (most schools say a bottle to sip at). I am not sure where you will find the advice though - sorry to be a bit useless but it is out there!

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MissSunny · 23/06/2009 23:49

Message withdrawn

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treedelivery · 23/06/2009 23:50

DD1 new primary allows each child a bottle of water to be with them at their station - to the best of my knowledge.

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Dysgu · 23/06/2009 23:50

Both schools I have worked in recently (covering children from 4-13) have encouraged children to have water bottles in school at all times. Children can then drink throughout the day - UTI or not.

I would write a letter and speak to the teacher once again. Possibly even send DD in with a water bottle and expect it to at least all have been drunk by the end of the day. Explain this is necessary to the teacher and say it is for medical reasons.

Might be worth speaking with Head about changing school policy for drinks - there is a lot of research that argues that children get dehydrated very easily and should have constant access to water.

Of course, water bottles are a novelty to start with and there is an increase in trips to the loo - but that settles pretty quickly and this time of year...

As for consequences for stinging with a nettle. Yes there should be but the teacher may have taken it as a one-off incident.

Again, if you get no joy, might be worth speaking to the Head - who will then flag up this issue in a staff meeting and all the staff can 'watch the little brat boy.

Hope DD gets better soon. If she is unwell, then keep her off tomorrow until the antibiotics have a chance to kick in.

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blinder · 23/06/2009 23:51

ok Katie but, personally, I feel that a UTI warrants being at home, as you say yourself in your post.

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katiestar · 23/06/2009 23:52

The school do supple all the children with their own waterbottles - but this teacher only lets them drink from them at playtimes.

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Dysgu · 23/06/2009 23:53

For research and information about why water bottles in school are a good idea, try looking at this www.wateriscoolinschools.org.uk/

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treedelivery · 23/06/2009 23:54

Your joking! I would not like that at all.

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katiestar · 23/06/2009 23:54

Thanks for your replies.Yes I will keep her off tomorrow .I just feel bad as she has already been off with a sprained ankle, a cricked neck and holiday this term already .Still if she's sick she's sick !

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nappyaddict · 24/06/2009 01:42

If the school's policy is that they can drink throughout the day and this teacher is saying they can't then you need to complain to the head.

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screamingabdab · 24/06/2009 03:04

God, your poor DD. I have had frequent bouts of cystitis, and a kidney infection once. It is very very unpleasant. In the circs, an adult would need to have a drink beside them all the time and be sipping at it frequently, so I think YANBU. As an adult, I had to drink pints and pints to keep the bladder flushed through.

I agree that you should query this with the school, but keep her at home for a couple of days to really knock the infection on the head, now it has got to this stage (which could have been prevented).

Re: the cousin, I assume you are wary of raising it with the boy's parents? The school maybe is not taking it as seriously because they are related, but objectively, they should treat it more severely than this. When one of my DSs hit the other at school, the head made him write a letter of apology to him, and take it to him in class, which I was glad of.

Sorry for the essay !

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Tambajam · 24/06/2009 06:25

I would speak directly to the headteacher about the water. That is simply stupid.

Re-cousin. I would be speaking to the parents. Is that something you have tried?

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EachPeachPearMum · 24/06/2009 06:54

Schools are not to restrict water from children- if you are having problems speak to your lea... though are your children at independent Katie?

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throckenholt · 24/06/2009 07:14

I am fairly certain that drinks should be available at all times to children at school - so that they can get up and get a drink in the class room any time they need it. For that very reason our school has a policy of keeping drink bottles in the class.

If the teacher won't agree to this then take it to the head and/or governors.

As for the bullying by her cousin - similarly if the teacher doesn't take it seriously then take it further. I would also tackle it through the family to - either you directly talking to the boy about what is acceptable and what isn't or through his parents.

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Littlefish · 24/06/2009 07:21

Water should be available to children throughout the day, but there may also be times when children are asked not to drink.

Eg. Drinks are kept on the children's tables, but during the main teaching part of the lesson when the children are on the carpet (for no more than about 20 minutes usuallly), children might be asked not to drink as it disrupts the teaching session. The same thing as often applies to going to the toilet (higher up the school).

The same thing might apply during the teaching part of a PE lesson, but drinks should be available for the rest of the lesson.

As others have said, if the school policy is for water to be available, and this teacher is going against school policy, then you should speak to the Key Stage leader, Deputy Head or Head teacher.

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Phoenix4725 · 24/06/2009 07:30

at dd school the children can have drink anytime they want theres a proven link between dehydration and there ablity to work

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Phoenix4725 · 24/06/2009 07:33

THere you go 2 offical sourcesto quote from

www.teachingexpertise.com/articles/schools-children-drink-more-299,

What effect does dehydration have on the

brain?
Water makes up about 80% of the brain and is an essential element in neurological transmissions. Poor hydration adversely affects a child's mental performance and learning ability. Symptoms of mild dehydration may include tiredness, headaches and a feeling not unlike jet lag, as well as reduced alertness and ability to concentrate. Mental performance including memory, attention and concentration can decrease by about 10 per cent, once thirst is felt. Mental performance deteriorates progressively as the degree of dehydration increases. Thirst is usually felt when dehydration results in 0.8 - 2 per cent loss of body weight lost due to water loss. For a 10-year-old child weighing 30kg this is equivalent to one or two very large glasses of water (300ml each), which is the amount a child could lose during a PE lesson or running around in the playground. Water consumption also has an immediate alerting and revitalising effect. In schools taking part in the Food in Schools water provision pilot project, the consensus from teachers was that "enhanced provision contributed to a more settled and productive learning environment, as well as helping to instil good habits". The key to boosting the capacity to learn is to keep well hydrated throughout each day (ideally from a personal water bottle within arm's reach).

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katiestar · 24/06/2009 10:56

Thanks for your really kind,supportive and helpful replies.
I have emailed the school.Explained everything the doctor said and the bit about her not being allowed to drink in PE.Have asked them to confirm they have received it and to put a copy on her file .I don'r think they would be foolish enough to go against my wishes now it has been put in writing.

I also told them about DN and that Catherine needed to know that it was being taken seriously.SIL would definitely take offence if I spoke to her about DN .She can't bear her DC not to be perfect.To be fair they are 5 boys who do lots and lots of clubs and activities and the rest of the time play very boisterously and violently with on e another in the garden.They are all very over-excitable and just don't seem to know how to chill

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