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To think my friend is an idiot?

(100 Posts)
mustardseed Sun 21-Jun-09 11:37:02

Went to a charity do at our local social club last night. Lots of people we know there, and their children, including one friend (will call her Sue) and her ex H Bill. Bill is on the club committee. Since they separated (about a year ago) Sue doesnt go to the club regularly, though obviously Bill does, but does still attend events etc.

So last night towards the end of the evening Sue gets chatting to someone (none of us knew him, think he's a friend/relative of one of the members) and they are quite obviously flirting with each other. Bill sees this, gets upset, goes over and pulls the man outside where they have a fight. My DH and a few of the others have to pull them apart. Man's wife then turns up, threatens to call police etc and get Bill arrested, is yelling he will go to prison and won't see his DC etc.

All the children (who are outside so see all of this) get upset because they all like Bill and don't want him to go to prison. His DC are in tears.

Eventually the man persuades his wife there's no need for the police & they leave.

We give Bill and the DC a lift, they are all still upset. He will probaby have to resign from committee now which is a shame as he does a great job.

Sue apologised to everyone before she left for what happened, & has already text me this morning to say sorry, & how awful she feels. I haven't replied to her yet as am still too annoyed with her for upsetting everyone like this. I think she's been really stupid, and has ruined a great night, lost her ExH his post, distressed everyone's DC including her own, and got some man she doesnt even know beaten up.

I feel like telling her she's an idiot. I'm not even sure if I can speak to her, and am thinking of taking DC to school by car tomorrow to try and avoid her on the school run, thats how cross I am!

so AIBU?

LadyOfWaffle Sun 21-Jun-09 11:39:10

YABU. Why did Bill pull the man outside? If she is an ex?

Katisha Sun 21-Jun-09 11:39:30

Hmmm. It's not really her fault that the testosterone starting flying quite so stupidly though is it?

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Sun 21-Jun-09 11:39:45

Message withdrawn

dmo Sun 21-Jun-09 11:40:14

think bill is to blame really
if they are separated then sue can do what she likes bill should not have pulled the guy out for a fight

thisisyesterday Sun 21-Jun-09 11:40:45

omg how on earth is this Sue's fault?

Bill is her EX husband. she has every right to chat to another man and flirt with him if that's what she wants to do.
Bill has totally overreacted. wanting to fight with someone over his ex wife????

Bill is the stupid one here for getting involved, and for tryting to start a fight. Sue didn'#t make him do any of that, he did it by himself

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Sun 21-Jun-09 11:41:03

Message withdrawn

ChasingSquirrels Sun 21-Jun-09 11:41:53

I think yabu.

Sue didn't pull the man outside and cause a fight - Bill did.
Apart from the question of whether Sue knew the man was married all of the trouble seems to have been caused by Bill (and then made worse by man's wife turning up).

How is Sue at fault in this?

StealthPolarBear Sun 21-Jun-09 11:42:09

assuming she didn't know the guy she was flirting with was married, what did she do wrong?
bill is the idiot imo

bellavita Sun 21-Jun-09 11:42:54

Bill is to blame. He and wife are separated. Who she talks to is non of his business.

YABU.

StealthPolarBear Sun 21-Jun-09 11:42:54

and even if the guy was married, it was none of bill's business at all!
Interesting point Reality...

spinspinsugar Sun 21-Jun-09 11:43:39

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VinegarTits Sun 21-Jun-09 11:44:04

Errr i think Bill is the one to blame for the trouble, YABU she has done nothing wrong

PortBlacksandResident Sun 21-Jun-09 11:44:40

Blimey - can i come to your next charity event? They're a bit more exciting than the ones here.

spinspinsugar Sun 21-Jun-09 11:44:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hobbgoblin Sun 21-Jun-09 11:45:00

Yep, same as everyone else says. Silly Bill for starting a fight.

bellavita Sun 21-Jun-09 11:45:06

yes, very interesting Reality smile

SoupDragon Sun 21-Jun-09 11:46:58

Did she ask Bill to go out and punch someone? No. It is entirely Bill's fault.

Boco Sun 21-Jun-09 11:47:00

I think Bill is the idiot. Sue can't help it if he starts hitting people. It all sounds a bit like an episode of Shameless.

mustardseed Sun 21-Jun-09 11:47:19

I'm honestly not Bill.

I know they are separated, but I don't think she should have been doing it in front of him, he was very upset when they first separated (her decision) and judging by last night he's clearly not over her so I just feel she should have had more sense. They were quite obviously flirting with each other.

Also it doesn't help that the man involved was married (although Sue told me she didn't know that, and assumed from the way he was speaking to her that he wasn't)

I agree she can do what she wants, but I don't think it should be in front of Bill, tbh.

flatcapandpearls Sun 21-Jun-09 11:48:19

I think Bill is an idiot.

angrypixie Sun 21-Jun-09 11:49:15

Text Sue back at once and tell her she did nothing wrong.
Bill is a tosser an EX-tosser and needs to get over himself.

Uriel Sun 21-Jun-09 11:49:28

Agree with flatcapandpearls.

Sue has done nothing wrong and had nothing to apologise for.

VinegarTits Sun 21-Jun-09 11:49:58

So you think its ok for Bill to beat up every man she flirts with? hmm

Bill sounds like a fucking idiot tbh and you dont sound like a very good friend, if i were Sue i would wipe my hands of the both of you

hobbgoblin Sun 21-Jun-09 11:51:19

She may have been acting insensitively but Bill was still a testosterone fuelled twonk.

What were Rita and Bob doing at the time?

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