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To get a bit annoyed about people asking why I've still got a little bump at six days post partum?

(35 Posts)
norktasticninja Fri 12-Jun-09 14:48:51

"Is there another one in there?","why have you still got a belly?"... I mean really, are people stupid or just plain thoughtless? FFS it's the last thing I need angry sad

I just calmly explain that my womb hasn't shrunk down all the way yet, my stomach muscles don't meet in the middle again yet and that there is undoubtedly a good layer of blubber there too. But still, it upsets me.

Would anyone really expect me to have a flat stomach again already so soon after the birth of my second baby in 19 months? I mean it's not all that bad, IIRC I was pretty much the same after DD.

louii Fri 12-Jun-09 14:51:22

Its all the celebs to blame for that!

Stigaloid Fri 12-Jun-09 14:51:40

wtf? who are these idiots and do you have to see them again? tell them to get lost. or burst into tears on them and say 'that is an incredibly insensitive thing to say to anyone, let alone someone who had a baby a week ago."


AMumInScotland Fri 12-Jun-09 14:53:24

I think the only thing is to answer "Because I've just had a baby, not a tummy-tuck you moron"

StealthPolarBear Fri 12-Jun-09 14:53:49

I think it's rude to ask at all but 6 days later!!
You could say "mine's mostly womb, what's your excuse?"

LovelyTinOfSpam Fri 12-Jun-09 14:54:39

My next door neighbours DH asked me if I had had the baby yet about 3 weeks after I had.

About 3 or 4 months after I had the baby my brother asked if I was pregnant again.

It's usually thick men with no experience of pregnancy babies etc.

Ignore them smile

norktasticninja Fri 12-Jun-09 14:55:10

Erm - FIL, the cleaner, a good male friend, a good female friend and I think a couple of others too. DP asked too but he really did just want to know how it works in there IYSWIM, none the less upsetting for that though TBH.

It really isn't that bad <sob>

BlackberryFool Fri 12-Jun-09 14:55:19

Message withdrawn

norktasticninja Fri 12-Jun-09 14:58:28

Mmmm, I maybe should have mentioned that they are all Dutch (so very forthright) but even so I do think it's horribly insensitive.

I'm glad I'm not the only one grin. Thank you. I feel better already!

MadamAnt Fri 12-Jun-09 14:58:29

Are they very VERY thick?

If I were you I'd do the passive aggressive thing of saying, "I'm sorry? What do you mean?" repeatedly as they rephrase their idiotic question and (hopefully) become embarrassed by their crassness.

LovelyTinOfSpam Fri 12-Jun-09 15:00:39

Do dutch people have internal organs which work in a different way to british ones???

Bizarre and truly rude.

stripeypineapple Fri 12-Jun-09 15:00:46

NBU at all.

I still have a bit of belly *7 YEARS* post partum.

Tell em fuck off.


screamingabdab Fri 12-Jun-09 15:01:52

Oh god, poor you.

My dad made a crass comment a few days after DS1 was born to one of my friends along the lines of "she's still got a bit of a tum".

What made it worse was that I had no idea what a post-partum belly would be like, and I'd had an emergency c-section, AND couldn't manage to breast feed, so there was none of that shrinkage you get when bf.

Agree it's the fault of celebrities and their tummy tucks, or super- fit athletes like Paula Radcliff with abs of steel.

Forget the blancmange Belly. Enjoy your baby !

norktasticninja Fri 12-Jun-09 15:06:52

LOL LovelyTinOfSpam!

FairLadyRantALot Fri 12-Jun-09 15:11:15

hm...have any of them got children/given birth guess is, probably not...or it was a very long time...and time is kind to memory (i.e. erasing the bad ones grin)

norktasticninja Fri 12-Jun-09 15:14:56

Almost all have children! FIL was first in with "is there another one in there" at , wait for it... 12 hours after the birth sad

FairLadyRantALot Fri 12-Jun-09 15:17:42

oh have my permission to kill that is annoying...ignore the bastards...and have some chocolate grin

oh, and ocngratulations, btw I bet you are norktastic right now, lol...only time I ever had boobs in my life was after childbirth, lol...

Momma23 Fri 12-Jun-09 15:25:40

I was asked this after giving birth 5 days previous. Lady said so when you due i said i had a baby girl 5 days ago. "and you still have a big belly don't you" ya had'nt really noticed! angry
I felt so angry and its comments like that, that hurt feelings esp after giving birth and hormones all over the place!
Had all mine very close 3,2,1 (and thats there age) Personal trainers i call them at times. Dont think i will ever see a flat tummy again some how though.

Momma23 Fri 12-Jun-09 15:27:53

Congrats by the way, If there so bothered by your tum ask them to give birth and see how quick there tummy goes down! grin

sarah293 Fri 12-Jun-09 15:31:19

Message withdrawn

duchesse Fri 12-Jun-09 15:38:34

Yes, and yes, are the answers to your two questions. They are stupid and thoughtless. And maybe (a teeny weeny bit in their defence) they don't have much experience of very new mothers.

womma Fri 12-Jun-09 17:12:36

Oh what nitwits! I guess you can use the 'hormones all over the place' excuse and be a bit rude back to them, can't you? Congratulations!

Lizzylou Fri 12-Jun-09 17:18:19

YANBU, I think I'd have just wept if someone had said that to me 6 days after my two, I was v hormonal.
There is a lovely Mother at DS1's school who had a baby a week ago, this is her third, she is nice and slim everywhere else but her belly is still swollen. She isn't in the least bothered and just looks lovely and flushed with the excitement of her new baby. Really healthy and happy. Her stomach would be the last thing I'd comment on to her!
It is entirely natural, congratulations on your new baby boy.

norktasticninja Fri 12-Jun-09 17:59:42

Thanks all! Somehow I've managed not to bite anyone's head off yet - I think if anyone else asks I might just do it though. Just to make myself feel better! Would that BU? wink

FairLadyRantALot Fri 12-Jun-09 20:26:22

Not at all unreasonable....grin

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