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DH is cooking supper

(34 Posts)
Hassled Mon 08-Jun-09 17:49:58

He does this about twice a year. He's even finished work early for the occasion, and it's something very complicated involving mushrooms, pork and Marsala (yes, he bought it specially) which the DCs will object to.

So I was trying to cook a sub-supper which the DCs won't object to, but at the same time - it wasn't going well and I've run away with wine. The kitchen looks like something's exploded but I can guarantee it will be DELICIOUS.

It has made me realise though that if I got hit by a bus tomorrow, DH is a long way off being able to turn out bog-standard family friendly meals every day of the week - are we alone in this?

girlandboy Mon 08-Jun-09 17:53:15

No you are not alone.

My dh doesn't even cook once a year, never mind twice.

He's alright at beans on toast though apparently...hmm

Alibabaandthe40nappies Mon 08-Jun-09 17:54:18


This reminds me of my first recollection of my Dad's cooking. We were self-catering in France and he decided to cook beouf bourginoine using a whole bottle of wine. I was 8, my brothers were 5 and 2. I can still remember how dry and horrid it tasted (now I would think yum yum!!). We ended up eating toast for tea. grin

DH is pretty good although has a tendency to be a bit light on the veg, I would worry about DS getting scurvy if he was in charge of the cooking full time

SomeGuy Mon 08-Jun-09 17:55:33

Can't understand it myself. If you like food surely you must like cooking....

Hassled Mon 08-Jun-09 18:00:12

No he likes cooking, and is good at it. It's just such a production. It can't be Spag Bol, it has to be something "special". Mostly it has to be something over-ambitious and unrealistic for a Monday night family supper. I need to lower his cooking expectations somehow.

GrimmaTheNome Mon 08-Jun-09 18:01:13

DH can cook meals DD enjoys and are quite well balanced, but only on the BBQ and only if I cut up and skewer the veg for him (I guess DD could do that though). He even buys the meat for BBQ himself. More good weather please....

GrimmaTheNome Mon 08-Jun-09 18:02:54

Maybe Mr Hassled could be persuaded to do something like a meat pie which is a bit of a performance but should be a crowd-pleaser. Or a hand-stretched pizza?

ABetaDad Mon 08-Jun-09 18:08:08

I feel the same about DW. I have to put everything in the oven ready for her to switch it on with instructions on how hot and for how long.

She just gets so tense and angry when cooking - even just fish fingers and chips for the kids. She can melt things in a microwave bt if I go out for the day she just buys a ready meal from Marks & Spencers.

She has no idea about meal planning. When I met her she lived on chocolate and coffee. She still would if I let her. I have to badger her to eat fruit and salad.

She has many lovely qualities but cooking is not one of them and has never cooked me a meal in 20 years of marriage.

Hassled Mon 08-Jun-09 18:59:44

Ah, so it's not as straightforward as a male/female divide then? Actually your wife sounds quite admirable - odd how something that is infuriating in a man seems quite brave and radical in a woman

Grimma - you're right. What I need is bog-standard meals which DH can turn into a major production. Although I still break into a sweat when I remember the time I went into the kitchen to see the pizza bases ready with tomato sauce on them, went and watched an entire episode of EastEnders, went back to the kitchen and all that had changed were the mushrooms on top of the pizzas. The mushrooms were perfectly arranged - equidistant - and all the same size.

ABetaDad Mon 08-Jun-09 19:42:54

In an odd way.... I like it. [Shhhh]

Cooking is fun and with DW sat there chatting to me drinking a glass of wine while I cook is quite nice at the weekend.

She does fill the dishwasher after and sets the table but has annoying habit of tidying up before I have finished and complaining about the number of pans I use.

I bet Picasso didn't have a tidy studio.hmm

tallulahbelly Mon 08-Jun-09 19:58:47

My DH often wails: 'But we're always having chicken/lamb/beef/fish'

Is there somewhere I can buy unicorn or perhaps just dog without all that fuss of going to Korea?

bruxeur Mon 08-Jun-09 21:05:34

SomeGuy - if you like listening to music you must like playing an instrument..?

If you like going on holiday you must like flying 757s..?

If you like drinking wine you must like stamping through grapes in the company of moustachioed, sweating Frenchmen..?


Different things. And don't call me Shirley.

KTP Tue 09-Jun-09 11:49:17

Hmm, DP says 'I'll cook on Saturday' on occasion. I sigh contentedly......this contentment is usually replaced on Saturday afternoon by irritation as DP asks me 'what shall I cook'...I Don't Care, Just Give Me A Day Off And Don't Ask Me To Menu Plan!

cornflakegirl Tue 09-Jun-09 11:58:10

My DH couldn't cook everyday meals reliably, until he became a SAHD and had to. It took him a few months to build up his repetoire, but he's there now. He even has a few meals where he's tweaked the recipe, and consequently I can't cook them as well as he can. Although if he cooks something new, he doesn't always remember to think about including veg in the meal. (Think he missed the bit about food groups in school. He still can't always remember which foods are carbs and which are protein.)

So I'd be fairly confident that if the OP did get squished tomorrow, her DH would get there in the end wink

PlumpRumpSoggyBaps Tue 09-Jun-09 12:07:32

My dh cooks curry. That's it. He takes four hours to do it because all the onion has to be chopped into teeny weeny pieces, all exactly the same size.

He claims to be able to cook other stuff, and possibly he can, but if he were left to look after the dcs on his own he would either have to work or he'd have to cook. There's not enough hours in the day for him to do both.....

melmog Tue 09-Jun-09 12:17:55

My dh loves cooking and often complains he doesn't get the chance anymore.
He can't just get on with it though. It has to be complicated, from a book, involve things we don't have in the cupboards, it will only be ready after dcs are in bed so I would have to do bath and bed on my own, he uses every pot, pan, dish and utensil we own and the kitchen looks like a war zone when he's done. I then have to praise every mouthful before I go and clean up after him.
It's normally delicious but I'm not convinced it's worth the hassle!

wishingchair Tue 09-Jun-09 12:31:03

KTP - are we sharing same man? Saturday nights he has declared are his cooking nights. I remind him Saturday morning: "oh right yeah!! ... errr ... what shall I cook?".

I say exactly same thing - don't care, hardest part is choosing what to cook, over to you.

And oh yes, the praise required from me and the self-congratulations from him are immense. Last time was really delicious (although I believe single-handedly added 4 inches to my waistline) but really ... what a performance.

Greensleeves Tue 09-Jun-09 12:33:23

my dh is a fabulous cook, and I'm not bad either

cooking together is one of our greatest shared pleasures

but we do tend to squabble over who has overall control and who gets to tamper with the flavour grin

PlumpRumpSoggyBaps Tue 09-Jun-09 12:40:49

Actually, I tell a lie- he has cooked something else.

After a blazing row mild disagreement I did a fabulous flounce out of the house halfway through cooking dinner, telling him he could cook the bloody sodding dinner and we were having potatoes dauphinoise.

Which he painstakingly cooked, sending ds1 out for extra ingredients.

It was delish. Much more delish than the potatoes boulangere which I meant to say we were having.......

PurpleKate Tue 09-Jun-09 13:15:42

DH is a wonderful cook now (he wasn't when he moved in though!).

We menu plan the entire weeks meals. He does the shopping once a month, so he is familiar with the cost of ingedients, I do the shopping the rest of the time.

In theory we take it in turns to cook, but in practice we cook the things we chose whilst meal planning. So I tend to do more stirfrys, he does the roast dinners, I do the casseroles, he does the curries.

Who ever didn't cook tidies up afterwards and does the washing up, stacks the dishwasher etc. Although if its his turn he often leaves it to the next day - I've had to learn to ignore the mess.

Still, t means I don't have to cook every day, for which I am really thankful!

iateallthecreameggsyummy Wed 10-Jun-09 13:45:21

abetadad i thought for a moment there you were my dh! LMAO

I dont cook, have no idea what makes a good meal. Fact is i can cook a fantastic roast, cottage pie spag bol but only copying recipes (not the roast of course) but i hate cooking. so dh comes home and cooks most night for me, and if hes not home i just eat toast or something easy! grin

Dread going shopping, trolly load later he informs me we have food for about 1 meal! the rest wont make a meal! grin

TheShipsCat Wed 10-Jun-09 14:05:00

I think a lot of us are married to the same man. DH cooks about once every two months - and it is such a palava, from what to cook, to preparing ingredients. We never, ever eat before 11pm if he cooks. And in the past it has been 1.30am...

ABetaDad Wed 10-Jun-09 14:05:55

Yes that is DW down to tee grin. She does do the online food shopping for basic stuff like bog roll, bread, milk, mince etc.

The stuff that is required to turn it into a meal just defeats her. If she ever does go shoppng for the extra meal ingredients to Marks & Spencer she just comes back with random things. For example:

Bananas, Cauliflour, Cheese Biscuits, Curry Powder, Eggs, Fruit Yoghurt, Duck Breasts.

I defy anyone to make a meal of that! I know this wil happen so I therefore have a huge stock of other ingredients secretly stored in the pantry - she really has no idea how a meal actually happens.

Gateau Wed 10-Jun-09 14:27:07

YANBU, but - and I'm not being smug - my DH is a brilliant cook and can turn some delicious dishes around in about 15/20 minutes!
He also likes baking smile.
I like cooking too, but DH is more of a natural at it. He instinctively knows what ingredients to use and rarely uses a book.

Lovesdogsandcats Wed 10-Jun-09 14:34:34

I HATE this - men who make a huge deal out of doing something (that their partners do EVERY other day without a murmur or fuss) and have to not only go over the top about it, but make a HUGE drama out of it too. Has he not noticed that when you cook, you do not make all this fuss?

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