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to express my concern about my kids travelling long distances on motorways with grandparents aged 70+ ?

(17 Posts)
Amalfi1 Wed 03-Jun-09 18:36:06

How do others feel about this? A sole grandparent who is 73yrs old wants to be up and down the motorway taking my kids away for weekends (kids aged 8 and 4). Given I have seen a change in the reaction times and general awareness lately of the said grandparent, I am avoiding letting my child go away as my main concern is driving safety. I do try to involve the grandparent every week in our lives, including the grandparent going away on holiday with us. I haven't expressed my concern to the grandparent as I think it would hurt their feelings.

ReginaCovington Wed 03-Jun-09 18:37:15

Of course they would be.

bigchris Wed 03-Jun-09 18:37:54

buy them both train tickets?
my dad is 73 and still drives on motorways but I havent noticed any deterioation of his driving skills

pjmama Wed 03-Jun-09 18:39:53

Your kids, your call. If you're not comfortable with the GP driving ability then I think I'd be saying no too.

SarahL2 Thu 04-Jun-09 09:44:33

My Grandfather was a complete liability on thr road by his mid 60's!!

I think you have every right to express concerns if you are worried. Better that than be sick with worry everytime they go out!

ninedragons Thu 04-Jun-09 09:54:03

You are absolutely entitled to put your foot down.

My FIL is much younger but such a bad driver (speeding, overtaking on the inside, drinking a pint or two before driving) that he is flatly prohibited from taking DD in the car with him.

nellie12 Thu 04-Jun-09 09:56:37

yanbu my df is a liability on the short distance between our houses so I always try to make sure I take them. He thinks he quite safehmm

nellie12 Thu 04-Jun-09 09:57:02

And not yet 70.

Lancelottie Thu 04-Jun-09 10:11:40

I've had to say no to my mum driving them anywhere at all. Apparently her optician says she's still OK to drive, but she regularly 'just clips' things she hasn't seen, backs into gates and walls, misses red lights...she could run them over in her own driveway, never mind having a motorway accident.

She keeps offering to have the kids while DH and I get away for a while, but lovely though that would be, I can't trust her with them in a car.

(Both my siblings merrily drop their boys with her and head off to the sun, so maybe I'm just paranoind.)

jellybeans Thu 04-Jun-09 10:13:01


brimfull Thu 04-Jun-09 10:23:48

my father is a really bad driver,always has been.

My dd went to stay with them in Canada when she was 11 ,they had massive car accident.It was my dad's fault.

Thank God my mother had insisted that dd travelled with my db in a seperate car. She witnessed the crash as they were right behind them. I would never allow my children to be driven by them anymore.
Thank God he doesn't drive when he visits the Uk anymore.

So yanbu , if you don't trust his driving say so.

HSMM Thu 04-Jun-09 10:28:29

What would make you feel worse? Saying "No" or dealing with the aftermath of an accident? I won't let my DD travel more than a couple of miles in the car with my Mum. (and even then I worry)

Amalfi1 Thu 04-Jun-09 11:39:09

Thanks everyone - really appreciate your opinions!

mumeeee Thu 04-Jun-09 11:47:00

How often does this Grandparent dribve? My dad is in his 8o.s and still drives a lot

wahwah1270 Thu 04-Jun-09 12:08:38


ninedragons Fri 05-Jun-09 04:24:49

I do sympathise, it's an awful scene to cause. The first time DH and I said it there were days of thunderous looks and sulking, but when something so crucial is at stake it feels like water off a duck's back.

Nekabu Fri 05-Jun-09 06:33:41

If you're worried about the standard of driving rather than the age then YANBU but I would avoid letting them know about it as that would be hurtful.

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