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AIBU to kill/divorce/torture my DH for the immortal phrase....

(36 Posts)
JoPie Tue 02-Jun-09 18:26:21

"I don't know what you do all day, this place is a total mess"
angry angry angry

What did I do all day? Ah you know, nothing much, fed, watered and suncreamed 2 small kids ad nauseum, changed nappies, played in the sun, broke up 400 fights in the sun, 2 loads of washing, school run, waited for the AA man when my car broke down on the school run, hoovered, made a lasagne from you know, day 200whatever of growing another offspring for you....all with painful sciatica.
So excuse me that I left the dishwasher full. angry

Sorry. Had to rant somewhere. Carry on now. wink

RedCharityBonney Tue 02-Jun-09 18:28:15

Ah, a voodoo dolly moment!

babyignoramus Tue 02-Jun-09 18:28:32

Jo you should print that off and stick it on the fridge. grin

Northernlurker Tue 02-Jun-09 18:29:40

shock - your dh said that to a heavily pregnant woman???

The man is plainly very brave or very mad!

(As well as being very stupid and insensitive etc etc wink)

Don't kill him - just leave him with the kids now whilst you go and do something Really Important (that will involve a leisurely drink and a cooling drive or walk)

SouthMum Tue 02-Jun-09 18:31:22

LOL I get "tell you what, why don't you go to work all day and I'll look after the baby" hmm

I keep his testicles in my handbag but he clearly forgot where they belong on THAT day grin

LadyOfWaffle Tue 02-Jun-09 18:34:56

I was really ill last week and as DH had to go to work, he said I didn't have to do anything during the day (housework wise). When he got home he said to DS1 "why when your mum is ill do you have to make more mess". It was the same amount, just I think DH thinks DS is tidier normally as he doesn't see it!

HouseisJackBauersDoctor Tue 02-Jun-09 18:35:24

Definately print that off and then every time he even looks like he is thinking that stgaple a copy to his forehead.

Leave him with them ona school day while you go shopping for an important appointment.
I do 1 or 2 days at work a month as part of my career break and leave DH with the girls. The house is always destroyed, and he always legs it out of the door within seconds of me coming in so he would never dare say that.

mrsleroyjethrogibbs Tue 02-Jun-09 18:37:29

good grief does the man have a death wish?

dh only ever says this to me in jest now having incurred my wrath the one time he said it seriously.
i did tell him that if he wanted to wake up in the morning that i suggested he stopped there

ThingOne Tue 02-Jun-09 18:39:21

I think it sounds as if he needs to look after them both all day on Saturday, don't you?

elliepac Tue 02-Jun-09 18:45:42

I heard those immortal words from my DH last week when I was at home for school holidays. I then, in his words, went gallivanting around London, for 36 hours over the weekend with my mum to see Mamma Mia. Therefore DH had DS (5) and DD (1) all weekend. Cue my return, house a tip and real appreciation of what I actually manage to achieve! grin. Would highly recommend this course of action.

lisylisylou Tue 02-Jun-09 18:51:17

As I was reading, I did a sharp intake of breath. A very hot, pregnant mum is likely to explode any minute. He must be on a different planet today. Why carry on? Go on strike and make him do the rest.

This may sound awful but after 12 years of being with dh, I think I've learnt a bit by now. It's like walking dogs on an extendable lead. When they stray too far, yank the lead back in again until they behave!!

Northernlurker Tue 02-Jun-09 18:54:30

OP - is your dh cowering in the understairs cupboard yet? If not, why not?


JoPie Tue 02-Jun-09 19:01:52

To be fair to him (though I don't really feel it), he is generally very good at doing his share. Until a few weeks ago I was studying (term just ended) and that was my job, sort of, so he had to do more than before. And yes the place wasn't that tidy today, but I was hot and tired and had had a bit of a scare when my tire blew out as I was driving, and it wasn't like I had done nothing.
I didn't realise he expected me to do twice as much as soon as exams were over, especially as he knows I'm knackered from months of late nights studying, as well as pregnancy.

Thing is, its never ok to say that though, is it? I mean we just had a 3 day weekend and he didn't even take the glass to the bottle bank, and I wasn't giving out yards to him!

I pretty much threw the lasagne on the table and left him to have dinner with the kids, while I cool down in the bedroom. He can put them to bed as well. Git.

Northernlurker Tue 02-Jun-09 19:05:45

Be sure to order a pizza in for your own tea!

weebleswobble Tue 02-Jun-09 19:05:52

Jopie I think you missed an opportunity there...lasagne in the lap might have hit the spot perfectly wink

kitbit Tue 02-Jun-09 19:10:01

Noooo. What you do is let him come home to a heap of ironing, pile of dirty washing in the hall, rooms unhoovered, all the children in the their pjs or underwear running feral, toys everywhere, bathroom covered in soap suds and slightly badly aimed efforts from the little ones, washing up in the sink, crumbs from lunch everywhere, pets not fed, nothing in the fridge and no tea imminent. Then you say:

"You know you asked what I do all day? Well today I didn't do it."

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight Tue 02-Jun-09 19:37:25

I can't wait to go back to work as DH will then have 3 days a week at home on his own with DS and will see what I do all day...he's never come out with a gem like that but he genuinely doesn't get how much work I do, as he's either at work, or recently has been home with me so gets to have lovely playtime while I get on with the housework hmm

pjmama Tue 02-Jun-09 19:46:33

My DH walked in from work yesterday and his first words were "Haven't you brought the washing in yet?". He's lucky to be alive to tell the tale...

elliepac Tue 02-Jun-09 19:48:33

I'm with kitbit's idea grin

cyteen Tue 02-Jun-09 19:52:50

<hastily checks breaking news for reports of pregnant woman on kill-crazy rampage>

Dear oh dear JoPie. I really think his central processor needs upgrading - book him in for an urgent service with your LOs this weekend as ThingOne says grin

5inthebed Tue 02-Jun-09 19:55:44

I'd go for the torture personally. Give him a DIY vasectomy, bottle of dettol and a couple of bricks wink

Love this "day 200whatever of growing another offspring for you". grin

I was heavily pregnant last year in this raging heat, your husband is a brave man saying that to you!

purpleduck Tue 02-Jun-09 19:58:31

permission to maim granted

duchesse Tue 02-Jun-09 20:04:03

All three I think, in the right order. No jury would convict.

wobbegong Tue 02-Jun-09 20:31:11

Leave him at home all day Saturday with kids.
On re-entry, say the same thing to him.
Stand back.

Ronaldinhio Tue 02-Jun-09 20:35:01


imagine your husband knowing where the dishwasher was!
you should be ashamed of yourself

I hope you didn't bore him with your day...that'll never keep a man happy.

Tomorrow put on a winning smile and a nice frock and listen carefully to his day

Poor dear that he is

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