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to want to stand in the middle of this group of parents and yell FGS ask me don't talk about me!

(23 Posts)
Peachy Tue 24-Feb-09 10:55:56

I know I am really, btw.

DS3 has asd, he is transferring to a SN school at Easter.

His one to one fell out with the Head and is leaving before that anyway.

there is no replacement NNEB coming in and theirs is the only class without an NNEB.

Everymorning I struggle to get to his 1-1 to handover as the other parents in the class have ioentiied her as class helper even though they know her role, I have to push past all their requests to make sure X doesn'ttalk to Y etc etc (it really does get like that).

This morning the group was tighter than normal. I won't go in as the Dh of one Mum(who is lovely in herself) verbally abused me abdly alst year with relation to DS1 (also asd). Dont tneed to rake that up again but thats why I am wary.

1-1 eventually just walks away with them still shouting orders at her and whisopers to me that they know she is going and have been firing questions to her about DS3 and what will he do in class /who will help him (God forbid he goes close to their kids after all- might be infectious wink- oh he'snot aggressive btw).

She pointed out she can't tell them anything but tehy still aimed questions at her.

AIBU in thinking they should just ask me? I'm there every day, have known many for years. One Mum I can understand being concerned (her daughter needs lots of support as has cancer, LEA rules mean she can't get a 1-1 herself which I think is very wrong). But if they ask I
can reassure that ds3 won't take up their precious teacher ratio any more, God forbid.

I'm sick of ds being whispered about: he's lovely,never harmed a soul but does need extra attention. Besides I wouldn't dream of asking for confidential info about their children. Why should they do this at ds3?

I'm not hiding ds3's SN place at all, i fought for it for years but the more they do this themroe contrary I get and want to wind themup that he is staying without a helper.

Threadworm Tue 24-Feb-09 10:59:29

I'm sorry Peachy. This is all horrible. I wish your lovely DS3 was at my son's school so that I could thump idiotically unhelpful parents like tghe ones you speak of.

I hope all goes well for him at his new school.

Cammelia Tue 24-Feb-09 11:00:05

I am sad and angry for you Peachy

missingtheaction Tue 24-Feb-09 11:00:22

Maybe offer to give a talk about him and answer questions a parent's coffee morning? write an open letter to the classroom?

TotalChaos Tue 24-Feb-09 11:02:18

No wonder you are irritated as fuck, but would it not just be simpler as regards your mental energy dealing with it all to authorise 1-1 to say - he's moving after Easter.

Peachy Tue 24-Feb-09 11:04:48

I wil tell her that TC< I thought that as soon as I walked off tbh.

I think its mroe the way they expect the info that bugged me, you know?

WRT to info,am going in after his departure to helpthe Dep Hed run the RE dept and will help with SENCO stuff in a voluntary role.... hoping to persuade her to let me run info sessions on ASD< ADHD< SLD< dyslexia / dyspraxia etc. SENCO at Juniors has been wanting something similar.

bumpybecky Tue 24-Feb-09 11:09:04

Peachy that sounds awful

would it be possible for you to drop ds off earlier or later? just 10 mins before or after all the others might make all the difference

mazzystartled Tue 24-Feb-09 11:10:12

peachy you're amazing.
i can't believe you have been faced with such utter lack of compassion and support from other parents. idiots.
as well as confirming that ds is leaving, i'd encourage your ds's one to one to tell them to exactly what her job is actually, and to generally bog off.

Peachy Tue 24-Feb-09 11:14:05

The proble with a staggerd rop off is that the other boys ahve to be there 5 mnutes earlier (next door,Juniors) and 1-1 isnt in until 9 as her own kids got there

1-1 is very open about her role,she is fantastic and we will miss her. it's one of those schools you know the type LOL: uber mummies fretting over Jocasta etc

I am not amazing,I am tired and whingy and neglect Dh and screw up a lot like anyone else

Nabster Tue 24-Feb-09 11:14:42

Those parents spound vile and selfish. How dare they ask about another child?

Sunflower100 Tue 24-Feb-09 11:21:47

Also angry for you here and sad. Tw@ts!

Sunflower100 Tue 24-Feb-09 11:23:55

Just looked at your pics. Your boys are gorgeous!!

Peachy Tue 24-Feb-09 11:28:45

Ah now that I agree with- gorgeous they are indeed LOL!

I don't think the prents are evil btw; I think its a combimnation of a sense of entitlement (and that always pushes my buttons which IABU about) and some kind of fear of me and mine.

bradsmissus Tue 24-Feb-09 11:46:33

I think I remember one of your previous threads about how badly parents have behaved towards you and your DS. Am shock that in this day and age (god - sound like my Nan!) people still have this kind of attitude. I am horrified for you but also for the DCs of these foul people. What kind of example are they setting. Too many people are far too precious and sefl absorbed where their children are concerned. I hope your DS will be very happy in his new school!

OrmIrian Tue 24-Feb-09 11:48:21

Sorry peachy sad

That must be heart-breaking. And infuriating.

Kimi Tue 24-Feb-09 11:56:30

angry and sad for you Peachy. been there myself.

Sunflower100 Tue 24-Feb-09 12:17:42

I just hate that fear thing - its just so ignorant - and so blatantly from the parents. Hang in there and don't let them get you and your down! angry angry

MrsMattie Tue 24-Feb-09 12:21:43

Arghhhhhh! I feel so angry on your behalf, Peachy. angry

Why are people like this?

pramspotter Tue 24-Feb-09 12:28:17

Peachy I am so angry on your behalf. Some of those parents need to get a grip.

NorthernLurker Tue 24-Feb-09 12:31:47

What terrible behaviour! Leaving aside for a moment all the demands of compassion and empathy and acceptance that we owe one another - it's just damn bad manners to be hassling a member of staff when they are trying to do their job!

I hope your ds is very happy in his new school.

duchesse Tue 24-Feb-09 12:47:58

What a bunch of prize idiots they are. Little do they realise that if your child did not have a 1-1, the class teacher would be way busier tending to him and would have a lot less time for each of their children. They sound seriously vile- you must be relieved that your little boy is getting out of that environment.

Peachy Tue 24-Feb-09 12:54:25

I'm glad he is going to the unit, I am glad he will be away from aspects of thsio school. TRhe chidlren are genrally lovely and I do think the parents don't intend anything by it (and they do have a few genuine grievances such as schoolthought ds4 wold be off earlier and took on another child meaning a class of 32, class teacher on sick since October etc).

mazzystartled Tue 24-Feb-09 13:10:05

ok, you're not amazing, then
You are, though, very generous, to volunteer your time and energy, and generous in spirit to people who maybe don't deserve it
It is a pity that they are misdirecting their concerns regarding class sizes in the direction of your family. Ans I agree that sense of entitlement is really annoying.

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