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to be furious my sister in law visited when she and her ds were ill and we've all got it?

(20 Posts)
TheDullWitch Mon 23-Feb-09 19:32:25

She and her ds had a nasty sore throat flu bug but wouldn't cancel their plan to visit for weekend. Her ds played with my dss. My sons caught it and were off school for a total of two weeks between them. (Whilst I tore my hair out trying to work). Then I got it off them, it turned nasty, and wrecked my half term holiday - I was in bed for four days and had to pay for a doctor to visit me at the hotel!

I am so pissed off with her. She just blithely came down and made us all very ill. But since it is my s-i-l I can t say anything. And anyway what could I say, it s too late now.

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Mon 23-Feb-09 19:34:20

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nickytwotimes Mon 23-Feb-09 19:34:38

If it was a mild cold or something, fair enough, but not a horrid flu bug. Very selfish and unfair.
Sure, you can't avoid germs, but you can minimise the chances of spreading them by being sensible.

TheDullWitch Mon 23-Feb-09 19:35:11

It wasn t a cold, it was a really horrible virus which had us all in bed for days.

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Mon 23-Feb-09 19:38:03

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TheDullWitch Mon 23-Feb-09 19:41:44

They had literally just recovered from it that week. Her son was still under the weather. It was exactly the same quite odd symptoms. ie no cold just sore throat and glands in neck swollen plus exhaustion. My sons went down with it a day or so after their visit having been completely well.

I just think it is selfish. That is three weeks of our lives in total when someone was really ill (I m still on anti biotics) with our much needed holiday wrecked.

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Mon 23-Feb-09 19:45:34

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TheDullWitch Mon 23-Feb-09 19:47:54

`I know. I should "let it go". But she is a selfish cow generally and would make the world of fuss if had been the other way around.

And it meant i lay in bed ill for four days whilst my dh and sons had fun. Now I m back in dreary real life again.

MrsGuyOfGisbourne Mon 23-Feb-09 19:49:37

YANBU - would have been civilised for at ealst to wanr you and offer to delay visit.
DS was invited to a playdate this hols. When I collected him , the mum told me they all had a d &v bug (!), and she was glad ds had come round because her ds could not leave the house shock.
Gee- thanks - would have ben helpful to know that , and postpone for a few days....

poopscoop Mon 23-Feb-09 19:49:58

my sis in law let her ds with impetigo play with mine and before you knew it my dc all had it too.

Obviously no school until better but one would get it again, so we were on/off school for weeks! Still laugh about it now, especially as we paid her back by passing on a stomach bug.

DontlookatmeImshy Mon 23-Feb-09 22:26:48


My Sil came to visit (several years ago now) when her dd had a really vicious cold. Poor dd whined and cried the whole time whe was only about 18 montsh old, I did a buffet style tea, but SIL sat dd down at the table infront of all the food which she promptly sneezed all over, I was fuming (but like you say, you can't really say anything hmm )and not suprisingly dh and I got the stinking cold too and spent a week in bed. Thank goodness we didn't have any kids at the time.

toddlerama Mon 23-Feb-09 22:33:46

Drives me crazy when sick people wont just stay at home! I wouldn't want to spread it around and I don't understand why anyone would want to drag sick kids around!

mumeeee Mon 23-Feb-09 22:42:46

YABU. They didn't have the flu bug or they would not have been able to get out of bed to visiy you/

TweetleBeetle Mon 23-Feb-09 22:44:30

My SIL visited when her DC had nits - wasn't too bothered until I realsied that as she was telling me her DC were brushing their with my hairbrush - my head itched for ages after, in fact even now its started up again, there something about the word nits!!!!

Heylittlelady Mon 23-Feb-09 22:53:00

YANBU! smile

I sympathise. Sometimes you just know where a bug's come from.

I was in the newsagents once and passed someone just as they coughed nastily. I just knew I would get that cough (I did, the next day, and it was damn awful).

More recently a girl at work had a terrible cough/cold and came over to show me something on my computer, using my mouse/keyboard. Even though I surreptitiously cleaned the mouse after with wipes I just knew I would get that bug I did).

She was disgusting though in terms of personal hygiene, leaving snotty tissues all over her desk/by the photocopier etc...

mugwumpy Tue 24-Feb-09 08:53:47

YANBU, i find mothers who drag their sick kids around are selfish for two reasons, their kids deserve a chance to get better but she obviously 'needs to get out of the house', and why give your lurgy to everyone else... we all have to get on with life with an everyday cold but keep nasty flu bugs and norro sickness and diahorrea at home PLEASE!!!

SobranieCocktail Tue 24-Feb-09 08:56:27

YANBU. Same thing happened to us over Christmas. I was furious.

mrsgboring Tue 24-Feb-09 09:00:52

YABU. Sometimes you think you're better when you're not. Even harder when you're assessing children.

LucyEllensmummy Tue 24-Feb-09 10:01:23

I know where you are coming from - if people visit me when they are ill i get really angry, but it is actually totally unreasonable. These viruses tend to be in the air, and often by the time you are into the symptom stage you are no longer infectious (not always but often). You probably would have caught it anyway - but i would have been pissed off to. I hate being ill, almost to the point where i think i have a little phobia about it - but if we all stayed in when we had colds etc, everything would grind to a halt.

A bit of aside - has anyone noticed that this winter seems to have been one cold after the other, so that you feel that you have had a cold/cough/flu all winter? Or is it just that DD has started nursery so is catching all and sundry? We went to lots of M&T groups though where she had potentially more contact with lots of different sets of children and was hardly ever ill. This year has been a nightmare and everyone seems to be the same around here.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Tue 24-Feb-09 10:02:28

YANBU - my FIL visited me after I had major abdominal surgery, with some hideous chest infection/flu he had picked up abroad, I caught it and the coughing caused me all sorts of problems!

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