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To think its not cos shes proud BUT to show off

(22 Posts)
lazybum Fri 23-Jan-09 21:31:35

A friend is always phoning/texting me with what she or DC are doing well at
She texted me again tonight to say DS has been moved up a reading level (DS and her DS) are in the same class just to remind me he is well above Ds on his reading level
I replied "Well done its good "

I don`t ring/text her about things like that Footie badges swimming badges as she does to me
Last summer DS did some footie badges when we went back to school a mum from the footie group asked if DS had got his next level I said he had`nt .He was working towrds it so probarly get in October break.
This friend just went quiet.Next thing you know she has booked her Ds into a footie group for a week.He gets the next badge My ds did`nt go as he was ill in the hols.She then phoned me to say how well her DS was and that he had got his badge "oh you should see him a kick a ball hes so good now bla bla"

I always say "nice one" etc when her DS does something like that

I am not jealous BTW
If DS gets an invite to a party and her ds does`nt ,She phones the parents up and say DS must have got lost so what time is the party or SHE just turns upblush

It is really starting to piss me off

I am not in competition with her nor is my DS so why does she have to keep letting me know


mysterymoniker Fri 23-Jan-09 21:32:31

she is a freak


southeastastra Fri 23-Jan-09 21:32:52

some people just thrive on the one-upmanship thing. i find it very odd. my sister lost a close friend after she started boasting of her black ash furniture.

Wilkiepedia Fri 23-Jan-09 21:34:09

She must feel inadequate in some way. Sad for her, annoying for you.


Chatkins Fri 23-Jan-09 21:35:22

Arghhh your friend sounds like mine !
Have had this crap for years, since we both had our first dc, around the same time.
hers is also based around drams and ill-fortune, she can beat you every time in how dramatic/amazing/frantic/stressful/busy etc her life is
Just ignore and dont care !

WinkyWinkola Fri 23-Jan-09 21:38:34

You sound like a really nice person. You're very lucky you're not insecure like she is. So competitive. It proves nothing in terms of her DCs abilities. It's more about her.

I would try not to make an issue of it although I can see it will get really annoying.Just keep on saying what you say like, "Nice one," etc. Some parents are just like this.

Also, maybe don't tell her what your DS is doing. If she asks, don't give details, just say, "He's doing fine, thank you," or "I'm not sure what level he's at just now,"

Wilkiepedia Fri 23-Jan-09 21:39:20

Agree with Winky's last paragraph as a way of moving forward with her BTW

DorisIsAPinkDragon Fri 23-Jan-09 21:39:41

Don't rise to it she obviously has noone else to bore compete with, so lucky you!!! You get alllllllll her attention ( and insecurities)

lazybum Fri 23-Jan-09 21:40:22


I was starting to doubt myself
Feel I can`t say "big deal" or something
But she would think I was jealous and I am not I don`t really a give a shit

I have put space between her Ds and mine as He was always trying to put my DS down in whatever game they were playing .It did`nt count if Ds won he shout he had cheated that kind of thing
And the last time he came round here caught him with DS playstations game in his bag WTF
She has no idea nor would she believe it

RiaParkinson Fri 23-Jan-09 21:41:26

SEA lol lol lol!!

random Fri 23-Jan-09 21:41:46

grin @ black ash furniture

twinsetandpearls Fri 23-Jan-09 21:44:15

I am somone who shares dd achevements with friends and certainly do not do it in a one upmanship way.

My facebook profile at the moment says that I am very proud that dd won a special achievement award in assembly.

Could it be that she is just incredibly proud.

<<twinset worries if I am secretly pissing off everyone I know>>

The party thing is very strange though/

lazybum Fri 23-Jan-09 21:45:20

I don`t tell her anything about DS at all .
Don`t mention the parties or anything from school .But she still finds out from her DSangry

We have some friends coming for a meal in a couple of weeks and shes really wants to come but these friends don`t like her and have said noway
She keeps asking me when are they coming they might want to see her and so far I have`nt replied just changed the subject
DH says just tell her the truth they don`t want to see her and that she is trying to make me feel guilty .
If i tell her the truth she will be gutted BUT....

naturalbornmum Fri 23-Jan-09 21:45:26

She sounds OTT. I think that competition is normal - we all do it to a certain extent - I have a friend who does it a lot but she is lovely.wink

RiaParkinson Fri 23-Jan-09 21:46:04

sea I have nominated you for quote of the week!

lazybum Fri 23-Jan-09 21:48:15

so you should post about your dd award
But she does it a manner thats not genuine

Like when her Ds got moved up in reading I must warn my DS in case her DS told him she would`nt want my ds upset WTF
Why would he be????

Heated Fri 23-Jan-09 21:53:54

My mother used to have a friend like this with a son the same age as my brother, although this was before the age of text - so competitive parenting time-slots were limited! She used to call him Mastermind!

Her friend enrolled her son in the same school and afterschool clubs and strangely - like in your post - he stole from my brother despite wanting for nothing. My brother was far too chilled to react tbh, but the boasting only lasted until his first brush with the police re petty theft. My mother afterwards only got what were clearly edited accounts which made her suspect that his troubles continued.

piscesmoon Fri 23-Jan-09 22:00:52

You seem to be doing exactly the right thing. I admit that she must seem very irritating, but rise above it and don't tell her anything. You have to feel very sorry for her DS and she must be a very insecure person.

CHOCOLATEPEANUT Fri 23-Jan-09 22:01:18

I was suprised when my dd started school and I too noticed this one upmanship

its pathetic

just smile sweetly and say how lovely!

mysterymoniker Fri 23-Jan-09 22:02:30

I wouldn't be able to stop myself from laughing

this might be why I have so few friends? hmm

Niftyblue Fri 23-Jan-09 22:44:48

Sounds like she has issues

Think your Dh is right you should tell her about the friends who are coming round for a meal.She is trying to spoil it for you playing on your guilt that you say she is putting on you

She sounds very controling if you can`t invite other people round to your house without hershock

I would start putting distance between you and her

Milliways Fri 23-Jan-09 22:49:55

grin at Black Ash Furniture.

(We sed to have this, thought it great until DH polished the table with a white wax polish that got into the grain and turned it stripey!)

YANBU, would love to read her Christmas "Round Robins"

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