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to think my mother might have wanted to read a book I lent her before passing it on?

(12 Posts)
mm22bys Thu 18-Dec-08 21:06:59

OK, I think I'm hurt by this more than anything, but I lent my mum a book, and she didn't have time to read it, so she lent it to my MIL (they're friends). She'd already read it, and so has her DD (my SIL), but another SIL is staying with her over so Christmas so it's been passed on to her.

I loved this book (Three Cups of Tea - about an Americann climber who got lost trying to climb K2, he was saved by some locals, and in thanks he built them a school), and thought mum would really enjoy it.

Rather than read it, she has passed it on (I don't mind my SIL having it, hopefully she will enjoy it as much as I did, but part of m thinks it wasn't my mums to pass on...).

AIBU to be hurt by this?

LittleJingleBellas Thu 18-Dec-08 21:10:15

Yes, I think so, massively


mm22bys Thu 18-Dec-08 21:10:42


janeite Thu 18-Dec-08 21:12:28

You are being unreasonable and over-sensitive. Although I think it is understandable (although not entirely rational) that people feel a bit sad if a book they have loved is not fully "appreciated" by others.

thisisyesterday Thu 18-Dec-08 21:13:42

i think you're being a bit unreasonable yes.
your mum has just lent it to someone else because she doesn't have time right now.
i am sure when she gets it back she'll read it.

mm22bys Thu 18-Dec-08 21:14:43

"Over-sensitive" is my middle name.

She just said she had other things to do, I don't know if she even tried to read it at all.

I still don't think it was hers to pass on though (even if it was to SIL).

Would anyone here pass on a book that wasn't theirs to somebody else? Is that actually "acceptable"? I would have thought not...but am willing to stand corrected....

mm22bys Thu 18-Dec-08 21:16:07

Oh the second SIL lives in another city so I am not sure it will be returned, but that I am not concerned about (I would be happy to buy another I did love it that much...)

feelingbitfestive Thu 18-Dec-08 21:20:52

I always pass on my books to whoever (usually work mates) with the understanding that they will then pass them on to someone else. It's how I like it - very rarely do I read the same book twice no matter how much I enjoyed it (except Harry Potter blush), and I would prefer it to be read rather than sat on a shelf - especially if I enjoyed it. If I wanted it back I would say so before lending it - usually coz I've promised it to someone else. Harry Potter is never lent out!
So, YABU (well, a bit anyway)

Dropdeadfred Thu 18-Dec-08 21:23:50

i too would never read a book once i had read it before so I always pass them on..often even just leaving them on a train seat in the past with please read and pass on written in the front

mm22bys Thu 18-Dec-08 21:24:11

Fair enough.

Thanks - she didn't read it but probably thought rather than just sit on HER shelf someone else could have it.

No biggie, and it is a great book!

mm22bys Thu 18-Dec-08 21:24:53

What's that thing called - got it, "Bookcrossing"?

prettybutterfly Thu 18-Dec-08 21:43:50

If I lend a book I expect it back. If the borrower passed it on without asking I'd be annoyed.

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