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To refuse to leave my child unattended in a car?

(144 Posts)
Gangle Sat 01-Nov-08 00:07:40

I was recently heavily criticised on a thread for saying that I would not leave DS, now 7 months, unattended in a car, e.g. in a petrol station or car park. Genuinely perplexed that people seem to think it's ok to leave kids alone - noone I know would do it and I don't think any of us are neurotic or precious about our babies.

2shoespunk Sat 01-Nov-08 00:08:46


Saturn74 Sat 01-Nov-08 00:11:39

You had support for your views on that thread too though, didn't you?

Everyone does what they think is best for their own child, and different people assess situations in different ways.

hatrickortreat Sat 01-Nov-08 00:13:05

Message withdrawn

Gangle Sat 01-Nov-08 00:15:40

Yes, a couple of people agreed but this was several months ago and just read on a different thread that one of the posters still rememebers and laughs about it. Is it that preposterous?

AnotherFineMess Sat 01-Nov-08 00:16:24

Each to their own innit? I genuinely believe that 99% of us parents have enough common sense and risk assessmnt skills to make the right call at the right time.

There are no hard and fast rules IMO, eg taking a child across a busy forecourt where eejits might be speeding off without paying for petrol (and not looking at what mother & child they may mow down on their way out) may be more risky than leaving child in secured vehicle for the 1-2 mins it takes to pay.

OTOH, on a hot day outside a shop that can sometimes have long queues, dragging all the DCs in for the short errand may be the wisest choice.

Gangle Sat 01-Nov-08 00:16:40

Sorry, I CAN actually spell, just can't seem to type! Tendonitis!

AnotherFineMess Sat 01-Nov-08 00:16:54

x-posts hatrick!

MrsGhost Sat 01-Nov-08 00:17:10

Gangle, whilst I appreciate your situation, when you have had children for a few more years you will look back at this thread and cringe.

Have a think about this scenerio.
You are at a Supermarket and have two children in the car, it doesn't matter whether you have parked in M&T or Disabled bay, you still have a 4 year old who can't walk and weighs 4 stone plus a 1 year old who is of average weight;

Do you

A)Get evil looks from mums with babys or the Elderly because you are parking in a M&T?Disabled bay. Then leave them both in the car and run like f* to get a double trolley,

B) Get them both out of the car and carry both to the trolley stall, and whilst carrying them both put you coin in the trolley to release it (best way of doing this is to put the coin between your teeth before lifting both kids out of the car) juggle them both whilst trying to get them in the car.

Or C) Go shopping at 8 after everyone is in bed and dh is home from work, but in the meantime run out of bread and milk for supper.

You decide!

MrsGhost Sat 01-Nov-08 00:18:44

SORRY B) should say juggle them both whilst getting them both in the trolley

hatrickortreat Sat 01-Nov-08 00:19:05

Message withdrawn

VinegarTits Sat 01-Nov-08 00:20:02

What do you want then? to not get criticised this time round?

I leave mine in the car when i pay for petrol, so what? we all parent differently, big wow. Have a big medal hmm

2shoespunk Sat 01-Nov-08 00:20:25

I left dd in the van today when I got diesal.
she might be 13 but she has cp so cannot walk.
maybe next time I should unload her wheelchair, just incase.
a) the van blows up
B) some radom passer by decides he/she like my van and steals it(ye I have the keys and think I would notice)

RottenOtter Sat 01-Nov-08 00:21:22

now this takes me back to the summer of 2004

that thread about nipping out of the garden or some such!

2shoespunk Sat 01-Nov-08 00:22:31

oh yes what to do, do you take the baby with you when you hang out the washing

Gangle Sat 01-Nov-08 00:24:36

Yes, actually, would be nice to not be criticised for making what I deem to be the best decision for DS, at 7 months. If he was 7, or 13, or I had 4 kids then maybe my decision would be different but yes, I am not critising those who decide to leave their kids unattended and wondered why people who do feel the need to criticise and mock those who don't.

GivePeasAChance Sat 01-Nov-08 00:24:51

Missed the thread - but what do you expect to happen while you go and pay for your petrol and your DS is in the car. On the forecourt?

ThePregnantHedgeWitch Sat 01-Nov-08 00:25:05

Message withdrawn

MrsGhost Sat 01-Nov-08 00:26:40

Come on Gangle what would you do if your life was my scenerio.

AnotherFineMess Sat 01-Nov-08 00:26:52

To the loo? To the bin?

Seriously though, I was musing about this the other day - the biggest potential risk I expose my DCs to is when I am home alone with them all day. Given that, statistically, I am far more likely to accidentally kill myself by putting my socks on or falling down the stairs, leaving them for 2 mins to pay for petrol pales into insignificance.

Gangle Sat 01-Nov-08 00:27:59

Can you find me that statistic please?

AnotherFineMess Sat 01-Nov-08 00:29:00

And by that I do not mean to mock you Gangle, but just to say that life is one big risk, but there you go. We all just manage that as we see fot and usually do a damn good job. [Group hug for all, both sides of argument grin ]

MrsGhost Sat 01-Nov-08 00:29:44

Come on Gangle I spent ages typing that.

hatrickortreat Sat 01-Nov-08 00:30:43

Message withdrawn

AnotherFineMess Sat 01-Nov-08 00:31:38

Oh doh, after 3 glasses of wine, you want me to find stats?? Will try, but in case I am incapable, read the ROSPA stats, something like 8000 people a year die putting their socks on loads, more falling down stairs. Certainly more than in locked cars on garage forecourts.

And I am genuinely not being factious here, just a bit hmm at how risk-averse we are becoming as a society. It does no-one any favours because we all just get more anxious and wound-up.

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