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would you let your child sleep under these circumstances?

(38 Posts)
lucykate Thu 30-Oct-08 21:15:02

me and dh have just had a row about this, ds pulled the shelf above his bed loose so it was hanging at an angle. as soon as i noticed it, i removed all the books from the shelf, and asked dh to take the shelf down before ds got back in bed. dh refused to remove the shelf, saying it was safe, not going to fall down etc, then it promptly escalated into a full blown row over it. so, who was being unreasonable?

i wanted the shelf taken down as it's heavy (it's one of those ikea floating shelves) and was above ds's head, not prepared to take any chances.

dh says i am insulting his diy skills, and that even though the shelf was hanging at an angle, it was not going to fall.

halfaquark Thu 30-Oct-08 21:16:29

You are right. Couldn't you have removed it?

scifinerd Thu 30-Oct-08 21:17:18

YANBU Why would your dp want to take the risk? What's worse? Hurt pride or something dreadful happening?

Maveta Thu 30-Oct-08 21:17:41

I would just take it down myself.

CharCharBaGOOOOOOORE Thu 30-Oct-08 21:17:57

I think he's taking it a little bit personally. I wouldn't let my dc sleep under that. Surely it wouldn't be that hard to take down. YANBU

Habbibu Thu 30-Oct-08 21:18:24

Tell him that if you're wrong, the worst that happens is that you look stupid. If he's wrong, the worst is - well, worse than him looking stupid.

Dropdeadfred Thu 30-Oct-08 21:19:07

is your child underneath it?

Plonker Thu 30-Oct-08 21:19:40

YANBU at all!!

Gah, men and their fragile ego's hmm
I would just take it down myself - shelves above beds aren't a good idea anyway IMHO.

DesperateHousewifeToo Thu 30-Oct-08 21:19:54

I would have taken it down myself (probably would have had to put it up myself too)

halfaquark Thu 30-Oct-08 21:20:31

Excellent post, habbibu

purplesponge Thu 30-Oct-08 21:22:39

It's really not worth the risk is it?

If you are wrong, the shelf stays on the wall, all is fine.

If DH is wrong, DS gets a smack in the face by a heavy lump of wood. Whilst asleep.

Why take that chance when it would take less than 5 minutes to take it down.

YANBU! He is.

misselizabethbennet Thu 30-Oct-08 21:22:50

YANBU. Shelf down. Even if it doesn't fall it could shift and send dust or bits of plaster into DS's face during sleep.

Unless you DS is over 18 of course, in which case he should take it down himself, as he pulled it loose in the first place! wink

tissy Thu 30-Oct-08 21:23:18

put pillow at other end of the bed for tonight, and ask dh to fix the shelves in the morning

crokky Thu 30-Oct-08 21:23:39

YANBU. I would have just dragged the bed a bit so that it wasn't under the shelf then sorted it out the next day if taking the shelf down was a problem. I would take it down and put it up somewhere else, not over the bed.

Habbibu Thu 30-Oct-08 21:23:40

Why thank you, halfaquark. Excellent name!

pointygravedogger Thu 30-Oct-08 21:23:53

can't you take the shelf down?

Jun Thu 30-Oct-08 21:24:37

YANBU

I wouldn't let PFB sleep under a small piece of plaster hanging fom the ceiling (result of OH's attempt to hang mobile). Ok that is lightly neurotic but with a heavy shelf, why take the risk.

forevercleaningwithmybesoms Thu 30-Oct-08 21:25:38

you take shelf down, and make a big hole in the wall while you are at it so he will have to fix that too grin

BloodshotEyeballsintheScarySky Thu 30-Oct-08 21:27:05

Do you want a screwdriver? wink

lucykate Thu 30-Oct-08 21:27:30

habbibu, you are absolutely right

the row started because i went to get a screwdriver, saying to him if he wouldn't take it down, i would. i got cross because i couldn't believe he would be willing to let ds sleep underneath it, because in removing it, it may damage his diy credentials hmm

ilove Thu 30-Oct-08 21:34:49

2 April 2003
Annie and Daniel share a bedroom, their cots are in an L shape with Annie's under the wondow and Daniel's running along the wall. For those of you that don't know Annie is 14 months Daniel nearly 5 months.

Running along the wall above Daniel's cot is a huge shelf unit, about 6' long and secured - by a joiner - several years ago. We used it for the Guinness books of records, nappies, creams etc, a fan for hot weather, the monitor and stuff.

At 5am this morning I was woken by Daniel screaming. So, muttering under my breath (as you do) I went to put his dummy back in. But I couldn't get in the room.

The shelf unit had ripped from the wall and crashed down onto them both, the end of it was in the foot of annies cot and then was hanging over daniel';s head

Had annie turned herself around and slept the 'wrong way up' as she was doing till I gave her a pillow a week ago, she would be dead. had Daniel had the books land on his head, he'd be dead. Neither of the babies has a mark on them, God knows how.

Every book (about 25 - 30 large hardbacks) had hit the floor. All the nappies were on top of annie, the fan etc and there were bits in Daniels cot too.

Ever felt as though you have seen a miracle? I think I did today.

That shelf had been there, with exactly the same things on it, for months, the shelf is - was - up with four massive hold-the-house-up brackets, it has ripped the plaster from the wall in places coming down

I'm still shell shocked

Please all of you do me a favour, if theres a shelf above your childs bed, take everything off it take it down or move the bed, because I don't think miracles like this happen twice.

The above is an entry from the diary I kept when my babies were small. Show it to your husband, please.

purpleduck Thu 30-Oct-08 21:37:34

OMG those floating shelves are SO heavy!
We have some, and they just pull off.

If its at an angle, wouldn't it put more stress on one side than on the other, thus making it more liable to fall down??
hmm

noonki Thu 30-Oct-08 21:52:17

oh ilove that made me shiver

Bride1 Thu 30-Oct-08 21:57:45

Oh God. My daughter sleeps with a shelf over her bed... Just teddies on the side that's above her, but there are books further along.

colacubes Thu 30-Oct-08 21:58:04

Hes a knob, sounds like hes either lazy or stubborn, hell he could be both! ilove's post says it all, take them down yourself.

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