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To not tidy up for the Social Worker?

(8 Posts)
BitOfFun Sat 18-Oct-08 15:55:51

My house is a tip - I have a dd with severe autism who gets genuine pleasure from chucking things, including food, spilling (nay, pouring ) juice etc on the carpets, even the odd accident when she whips her nappy off. I try to clean up after her, but there is sometimes the faint odour of wee from a spot I don't know where...She currently enjoys stripping off wallpaper too.

On top of this, my "helpful" brother, who works shifts, has started numerous DIY jobs for me, which are all unfinished, including a half-insulated loft, a hole in a wall, bare brick on the kitchen walls after he removed the tongue and groove "to check what was behind it" etc etc We stripped all the paper of DD's room walls nd he promised to re-skim the walls before putting a coat of paint on, but weeks later it still looks like she is sleeping in a Victorian orphanage.

I can't do much when dd is around as she needs close supervision, and by the evening I am knackered, and looking forward to spending some time with my DP (we have separate houses but he sleeps over). DD wakes a lot during the night, so it is not far off having a newborn IYSWIM.

I also admit I am a bit lazy about housework anyway.

Anyway, a social worker is due for a visit soon to review DD's support package (Sat mornings fortnightly she attends a playscheme, that's about it...)The question is, ladies, do I let her see this pit in all its glory so she can see I need some more help, or is this a surefire Black Mark on my character and will I be seen as feckless and an unfit mother? I am not sure of the best course of action, and am hoping it does not involve breaking out the marigolds...

But let me know, I can take it smile

HRHSaintMamazon Sat 18-Oct-08 16:00:20

what do you want from the SW visit?
if you are hoping to geta bit of extra respite then no, dont do any extra tidying. let her see that you need time without Dd in order to catch up on all the jobs you cannot manage whilst she is there.

There is a difference between tidy and clean.

if its untidy, thats fine. if its unclean...youwill get extra visits.

sagacious Sat 18-Oct-08 16:00:46

I wouldn't tidy up in your circs.
Hope you get the help you need (and your bro gets a kick up the arris to finish the jobs he started !)

BitOfFun Sat 18-Oct-08 16:03:52

I see ... hmm, some cleaning then awaits. The problem is it gets very messy quickly because of DD. The kids are clean though, and I am smile. Can I ask to meet her somewhere else? Don't want her suing me for tripping over something like that midwife...

nooOOOoonki Sat 18-Oct-08 16:12:49

I have been to houses with sw on many occasions. They are only interested if it looks like you are not coping and that the state of the house is so bad that it is a serious health risk to the children.

Wont be interested in decoration etc, would be interested in dirty plates (for days), hazards near children etc.,

ps your house sounds a bit like mine and I have no good reason!

HRHSaintMamazon Sat 18-Oct-08 19:16:09

yes don't panic.
Im a social worker and my house is a tip!

They don't care if your sofa is older than you are or your walls are painted bright green with yellow dots. all they want to see is that the house is clean and causes no harm to the children or you.

monkeymonkeymonkey Sat 18-Oct-08 19:18:37

I wouldnt tidy up. I dont think you have anything to gain from making your situation look better or easier than it is.

BitOfFun Sun 19-Oct-08 00:22:37

Thanks for your replies guys...I guess I have to pull my finger out to at least a small degree! Any other input appreciated though, if this thread stays active by tomorrow morning...Thanks again!

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