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or is MIL?

(20 Posts)
annoyedwithmil Sat 18-Oct-08 07:50:03

I have namechanged as I don't know if SIL uses MN.

I'm expecting my second DC and MIL keeps making snide comments. Its really annoying me and I have to rant on here or I will end up saying something.

First off she told DH to leave and take the kids when I have this one. I am really annoyed by this and all DH says is "I would never do that" which I know he wouldn't. But he let us go away with her knowing she had said this and told me when we got back!!

Second, I didn't BF my first but would like to with this one. Apparently I can't because my DS will be upset and it will cause him to want to move out at an early age(5 she said) because he will know he wasn't BF. I also can't because I didn't bf DS I won't make any milk this time round and because I hate milk and don't drink it, I wont make any milk. All I know is untrue but its still bloody annoying me.

Her latest thing was while at my nephew's birthday party we were all talking about labour as SIL is expecting too. She doesn't want an epidural. When I got asked I didn't get a chance to answer MIL said "Of course she will, she can't cope with pain" URMMMMM Did I have one with DS NOOO!!! I hate needles and the thought of an epidural makes me feel very sick. I did think I'd like one but once I realised what they had to do I changed my mind. When I said that I wasn't going to have one she said "Don't be stupid of course you will" I'm sick of it and so is DH. He spends all his time when he goes to visit defending me.

Am I just over sensitive?

umberella Sat 18-Oct-08 07:52:08

No she sounds dreadful!! Some mothers are very weird about 'competition' for their son's affections -she sounds like one of them. Your DH should tell her to ahut up once and for all to be honest.

blueskyandsunshine Sat 18-Oct-08 07:52:25

No, she's beastly, a real specimen.

Bad luck. Not much you can do except avoid her, she really is a frightful bitch by the sounds of it.

Bubbaluv Sat 18-Oct-08 07:57:02

I would absolutely refuse to go and see her. She will still bitch about you, but at least you won't have to listen to it!

AbbeyA Sat 18-Oct-08 08:00:16

I have no suggestions but you are not being over sensitive! Try and avoid her as much as possible.

ANTagony Sat 18-Oct-08 08:07:05

She smarting because you've taken her DS and made him love and respect you, as much or over her. It doesn't have to be a competition but shes making it one. By standing back and not over reacting (taking it on the chin) letting your DH do his bit by defending you to MIL you have your self respect and by the sounds his.

I'd back off reduce the visits and access and if she asks get your DH to say why.

BTW DS1 was a lazy suckler so didn't breastfeed, DS2 latched on as born and felt like he didn't stop for 6 months day and night. It was lovely time when I was BF with DS2 because DS1 would snuggle up to me and chatter away about nothing knowing he had my full attention for 15-20 mins. Quite the opposite of jealousy really.

WinkyWinkola Sat 18-Oct-08 08:21:21

She's talking a load of rubbish.

Either avoid her or assert yourself, telling her that if she's nothing nice to say, then don't say it. It's up to you how you handle it. But whatever decision you make, don't let her get to you.

Bitches are generally very unhappy people and don't let her poison your life.

twentypence Sat 18-Oct-08 08:57:39

If she is going to talk crap then say you can't see her because someone on the internet said she will curdle your milk and your nipples would explode with the pressure.

Or you could just leave the phone off the hook.

pamelat Sat 18-Oct-08 13:59:41

She tells your DH to leave you????! What as in permanently?!
What a cheeky moo.

cheshirekitty Sat 18-Oct-08 14:01:37

She is pure poison. Keep away from her. Do not go and visit her until she has learned to respect you.

babyOcho Sat 18-Oct-08 14:03:42

what a witch. avoid the woman.

MrsMattie Sat 18-Oct-08 14:07:08

She sounds mentally unstable.

crokky Sat 18-Oct-08 14:07:33

I breastfed my DS for just over a year.

Three weeks after I had stopped feeding, I attempted to give him one last feed because he was ill. He had no idea what I was doing - he forgot a year of breastfeeding in under a month.

I am now breastfeeding my DD. When DS saw me feeding her when I got home from hospital, he had no idea what I was doing getting my boobs out and letting a baby suck them - honestly he thought it was totally bizarre (he was only just 2 by then). He's used to it and totally not bothered now.

I don't think your DS is going to know whether or not he was breastfed and I doubt he would care either!

glaskhamhasoneintheoven Sat 18-Oct-08 14:17:29

She sounds like a nightmare MIL!!! I dont know how you put up with it!! If that were me i'd not see her unless we were both at the same family social event etc!! I'm lucky my MIl is lovely, but we dont get to see her often as she lives a good 250 miles away... S-MIL on the other hand is a bit like your MIl... but not as subtle... we announced our 3rd pregnancy at 8wks pg as i was showing so much i couldn't hide it... she said 'who's getting doctored after this one then?' and was saying it's another dreadful accident to happen to us... This one was planned!! Oh i wont go on any longer as i'll just infuriate myself!!

wotulookinat Sat 18-Oct-08 14:22:06

What a horrid woman she sounds like.

sweetgrapes Sat 18-Oct-08 14:26:55

YANBU.
Stupid b*&^ch... guilty as charged on all counts.

Monkeyblue Sat 18-Oct-08 14:27:42

I am impredded you have kept your mouth shut

I would be so angry

I thought my MIL was bad but compared to yours she is`nt

Monkeyblue Sat 18-Oct-08 14:28:08

I mean Impressed NOT impredded
WTF

annoyedwithmil Sat 18-Oct-08 15:05:33

Yes PamelaT She has told him to leave permently and take the kids. I'm very lucky as we are very happy.

I don't enjoy visiting her but feel like I have to because she is DH's mum.

pollyblue Sat 18-Oct-08 15:12:19

Maybe your dh needs to have a firm "this stops NOW" conversation with her.

She sounds batty and is talking cobblers but really, you shouldn't have to put up with it and he shouldn't have to spend his time defending you. He needs to make it plain to her that you are both adults and are fed up with her attitude towards you.

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