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To have spent £70 on tickets to a concert my ds wanted to go to, and not take him after all?

(41 Posts)
QuintessenceOfFrankenShadow Tue 14-Oct-08 16:09:51

There is a top violinist playing at the concert hall in town. One day only, he has brought with him his young students. I booked tickets for myself and ds1 (6 1/2)as he is really eager on the violin.

But, it is too late and not really suitable for ds1 who is 3. So, we decided my dh should take him to see a childrens show at the cinema, rather than stewing at home.

Ds2 was delighted when he heard the plans, really happy and excited. It was a film ds1 earlier had said he did not want to see as if was "too childish"

DS1 threw such a tantrum, shouting and kicking that his brother got to go to the cinema and not him. AND his brother got to eat popcorn, and not him.

Ds2 started crying.

We make popcorn once a week, at least. It was a film he did not want to see.

He woke up this morning, quivering lips, glancing at his brother saying "I dont want to see Mummy Moo (film)."

He is now at the cinema with dh. He was not a happy chappy, he is a very sensitive little boy. It seems his brothers prolongued outburst and displeasure that ds2 should also have some enjoyment has really put him off it.

It has put me off. I am not taking him. I am sad and angry and upset. He seems unable to comprehend what he is doing is wrong. £70 wasted. Shit.

soapbox Tue 14-Oct-08 16:13:37

Oh FGS give him a break - he's 6.5 yo and has conflicts about whether he wants to be a big boy or not.

Really, totally disproportionate sanction imv.

You have now spoiled it for him too and you are the one who is supposed to be an adult!

lulabellarama Tue 14-Oct-08 16:14:31

I'm really confused by your post. Am I being dim?

Dropdeadfred Tue 14-Oct-08 16:15:47

Wow - you have VERY high expectations of him don't you?

Are you sure that at 6.5 he would reall sit through a whole concert anyway, regardless of whether he likes the violin?

QuintessenceOfFrankenShadow Tue 14-Oct-08 16:15:58

Yes I know. But it seems that trying to please both our sons and give them both a good experience has resulted in a total disaster. And for sure I wont be doing this again.

We did tell him we would take him to the cinema at the weekend, to no avail. Because his brother got popcorn TODAY.

MorticiaAnnSpookington Tue 14-Oct-08 16:16:41

um,think you are being waaay too harsh - take him, don't be childish

QuintessenceOfFrankenShadow Tue 14-Oct-08 16:17:03

Possibly not. Maybe I was more keen for ME to take him, than for HIM. So it wont be a big loss at all to stay home.

I have probably put him off playing the violin too.

MummyDoIt Tue 14-Oct-08 16:17:29

I'd have made some popcorn at home and given him a small tub to eat during the violin concert.

QuintessenceOfFrankenShadow Tue 14-Oct-08 16:17:42

I am not GOOD at this parenting thing.

NOt really good at much at all.

ChippyMinton Tue 14-Oct-08 16:19:32

Please give him a hug, make some popcorn together then take him to the concert.

Dropdeadfred Tue 14-Oct-08 16:19:39

you are too hard on them and then too hard on yourself when they don't respond how you imagined...

just relax...

more Tue 14-Oct-08 16:20:43

Could you not just have compromised and told him that they would be bringing some popcorn back for him?

Although I am with lulabellarama, am not sure I understand exactly who woke up upset, and who did not want the other one to be happy.

QuintessenceOfFrankenShadow Tue 14-Oct-08 16:21:28

But can he munch on homemade popcorn during a classical concert?

I guess I could put some in a plastic bag...

I am trying to be the perfect mum. I am devastated each time I dont get it right.

Saturn74 Tue 14-Oct-08 16:21:46

He's only little.

He wanted what his brother was having.
Hold the front page! wink

Diffuse the situation, make up and enjoy the concert. smile

QuintessenceOfFrankenShadow Tue 14-Oct-08 16:22:12

ds1 did not want ds2 to go to the cinema. ds2 woke up unhappy. I am not very clear.

Saturn74 Tue 14-Oct-08 16:22:41

I wouldn't bother with the popcorn.
Maybe get an ice cream at the interval instead?

MorticiaAnnSpookington Tue 14-Oct-08 16:22:51

oh for goodness sake, nobody gets it right - calm yourself,make popcorn - classical concerts aren't sacred things, you don't need to be all stiff and formal - and go and enjoy it both of you...

QuintessenceOfFrankenShadow Tue 14-Oct-08 16:22:52

I shall go give him a hug, rush to the shower. Make popcorn.

more Tue 14-Oct-08 16:23:20

Just put the popcorn in something that does not rattle, maybe a box of some sort.

QuintessenceOfFrankenShadow Tue 14-Oct-08 16:23:29

or by icecream.

<ponders hard>

QuintessenceOfFrankenShadow Tue 14-Oct-08 16:23:50

thanks guys. smile

MorticiaAnnSpookington Tue 14-Oct-08 16:23:57

yay ! good girl ! it'll be lovely just the two of you...

soapbox Tue 14-Oct-08 16:24:04

I'm laughing at me ranting at you - look at my OP last night www.mumsnet.com/Talk/parenting/626548-i-am-so-furious-with-dd-which-is-pretty-much - what a difference a day makes

Anyway, take the advice you get here - is it too late to go now?

You do seem to rather have it in for your DS1 at the moment and I really do wonder whether you really do know what is reasonable to expect from him. Particularly given all of the upheaval in his life over the last year.

His little brother won't break - older siblings have been behaving this way for many a long year and by and large the little ones come out of it stronger and wiser! He's only 6 - he needs his mummies affection as much as your 3yo does - if not more

more Tue 14-Oct-08 16:24:17

woohoo, hope you both have fun.

soapbox Tue 14-Oct-08 16:26:13

Oops X-posted - have fun

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