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To be despairing of dh's father who has had another two car accidents within 5 minutes of each other.

(24 Posts)
GabrieltheToad Mon 06-Oct-08 14:06:22

I am amazed he can get insured. He is 70, he is a very doddery (I am not being nice about it because he makes me so angry) 70.

He has admitted it was his fault, he doesn't know what happened(this is what he always says). About 12 months ago he smashed his car into a tree on a very busy school route and the pedestrians there managed to get out of the way (he's not sure how the tree got there hmm) the year before he ploughed his camper/vehicle into a bus stop smashing it to bits (Thankfully at 4am so nobody was waiting there)he will not drive a manual car and regularly confuses the brake for the accelerator. (I won't travel with him neither will the children anymore I am so terrified)

Dh has made it clear to him he thinks it's only a matter of time before he injures or kills someone, he has said the law says he can drive so he will carry on until they tell him otherwise.

Is here anything I can do, I am seriously worried about him harming someone. sad

namechanger as I know several mumsnet ladies in RL.

hecate Mon 06-Oct-08 14:07:17

Can you talk to the dvla and ask for their advice?

CarGirl Mon 06-Oct-08 14:08:25

I'm sure you can report him to the DVLA and they can revoke his driving licence.

TsarChasm Mon 06-Oct-08 14:09:13

Yes contact the dvla for advice. He sounds terrifyingshock

Iklboo Mon 06-Oct-08 14:09:14

Def contact the DVLA for advice. I might even be temoted to pop into the local police station and have a word with the duty officer and see if they can recommend anything

edam Mon 06-Oct-08 14:10:02

Must be very worrying. Suggest you talk to his GP - if the doc thinks he's not fit to drive, he can write to the DVLA.

I'm surprised he still gets insurance, tbh. Have you checked that he is insured?

Megglevache Mon 06-Oct-08 14:10:51

I have the same problem. shock

FIL in his 60's and I'm sure he hasn't told them about all of his health problems bit I can't be sure.

Having said that my dad is a tatl lunatic driver too or maybe I am just too safe IYKWIM.

PrettyCandles Mon 06-Oct-08 14:12:33

When did he last have his eyesight checked? He may need glasses or a new prescription and not realise it - even if he maintains he doesn't. Driver's licence is only valid up to 70 in any case, then has to be reapplied for every 3 years.

Megglevache Mon 06-Oct-08 14:23:41

I might ring the DVLA and ask myself if there is anything they can do although I'm sure after 70 you need to test again at 75?

My dad just thinks he is Lewis Hamilton OTOH.

Is it a new/powerful car?

mummy5bellies Mon 06-Oct-08 14:44:32

what happened with these 2 accidents? Were the police not involved?

GabrieltheToad Mon 06-Oct-08 16:41:50

To address the questions here.

(Police)No they weren't called except for he tried to just drive away from the tree incident but a policeman not in uniform tackled him and stopped him from leaving the scene, believe it or not.

The bus shelter was done through the insurance I think they may have been involved but he most certainly was not charged with anything.

He does wear glasses and he had a new prescription last year some time and changed the shape of specs (which is how I remember)

If he has to apply for a licence in three years does he has to take an actual test. there is no way he would pass. I'm hoping that comes sooner rather than later.

I would rather not be directly involved as he would not forgive me if he knew i was responsible.

loobeylou Mon 06-Oct-08 16:57:55

Does he need to know you were involved if you call the DVLA? Surely they can claim someone anomymously reported his reg number for bad driving?

If he is as bad as you say then you need to do something now before you end up with a dead child on your conscience. I know its tough. It does not sound like these accidents were just a case of bad luck, he sounds dangerous!

Thankfully DH's dad has already said he wants us to tell him when he is getting past it, as he remembers how bad HIS fathers driving got!

GabrieltheToad Mon 06-Oct-08 17:06:56


I have no idea if you can call then anonymously.

I do think he is dangerous and I want my dh to sort it out f I am perfectly honest.

babyignoramus Mon 06-Oct-08 18:00:57

Gabriel, where are you based...? I know in East Sussex you can report dangerous drivers viw the 'Operation Crackdown' website as long as you have a reg number....

BalloonSlayer Mon 06-Oct-08 18:13:49

Talk to the DVLA. You can tell them the whole sorry tale in confidence and they will be grateful you called.

If they suspect a medical problem they will send a form for his GP to fill out. They will also write him a letter saying that it has come to their attention that he may not be well enough to drive and want him to have a medical assessment.

I did this with my Dad, then his medical condition improved and the bloody Doctor gave him his licence back! When I spoke to him he said "you can't stop someone from driving just because they might have an accident." hmm

Dad was still driving right up to being admitted to hospital before he died. The week before I had written to the DVLA again (didn't bother with the doctor this time). He was asking us about his car keys in hospital and the social worker's face was a picture when she overheard: "He's not still DRIVING???!!!!" I wanted to say, yeah, thanks to Dr X.

I found the second letter from the DVLA requiring him to be checked out in his post after he died.

I have never CAT -ed anyone and don't know if my profile is set up that way. But I am happy to send you copies of the letter I sent, or even post them on here if it would help.

BalloonSlayer Mon 06-Oct-08 18:15:26

Oh yeah and if the police were involved he would probably suspect they passed his details on to the DVLA.

SaintRiven Mon 06-Oct-08 18:15:44

sounds like he is going to kill someone.

cheshirekitty Mon 06-Oct-08 19:27:59

Dob him in. Phone the DVLA. Imagine if it were your child at the bus stop.

GabrieltheToad Mon 06-Oct-08 20:26:27

I am very concerned about it hence the thread and I panic. What if he does some serious damage then I will feel responsible. I think the best thing to do is to write to the DVLA anon. BalloonSlayer I would like to take you up on your offer and pinch your letter if I may.
Can you post part of it on here?

suedonim Mon 06-Oct-08 20:47:01

My brother's MIL killed herself by driving long after she should have given up. She was 80+ but insisted she was still ok to drive the couple of miles to and from the shops. She managed to wrap her car round a telegraph pole and died a few days later in hospital. sad So do what you have to, Gabrielthetoad.

HomeintheSun Mon 06-Oct-08 21:17:57

Could it be he's passing out hense "didn't know how the tree got there", if he's got blood pressure problems this could happen, I knew a lady who passed out while driving and hit another car, (no one injured thankfully) is your MIL noticed anything at home?

BalloonSlayer Tue 07-Oct-08 09:20:58

OK this is more or less the text of the last letter I sent (poignantly I noticed I sent it on 3rd March this year, he was taken into hospital on 4th March and died on 11th April sad)

I would still recommend you phone them and ask if there is ANY chance your fil might find out it was you who alerted them. They will almost certainly be able to reassure you that they will never let on. It might be the case that they would not take notice of an anonymous letter, lest it be malicious.

I am proud of the last two paragraphs, the penultimate one I think reassures that I am not just out to cause trouble, and the last clearly lays the blame at their feet should they fail to take action grin

Drivers’ Medical Group
SA99 1TU

Dear Sirs,


I am writing to you concerning the health of my father, XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX.

My father has had his licence back for approximately a year, and it has been good to see him driving and getting out and about again.

However, since Christmas his health has started to decline again and my sister and I have once more become worried that he is not fit to drive.

He seems generally unwell and lacking in energy and frequently falls asleep for a few minutes at a time. A family friend telephoned to inform us – with some alarm - that this had happened twice recently while he was sitting at the table sharing Sunday lunch. His powers of attention also seem to be significantly impaired, for example: I have seen him fail to notice someone walking in front of him to leave a room, expressing surprise a minute later that they were no longer sitting next to him.

My sister and I have discussed the issue with our father but he is confident that he remains alert while driving; something which we sadly doubt.

I telephoned the DVLA for advice, and was told to put my concerns to you in writing so that my father’s doctor can be approached for his opinion on the matter. My father’s GP’s details are as follows: Dr xxxxxxxx

I must stress that both my sister and I are very aware of the enjoyment our father gets from driving, and neither of us wish to make things difficult for him, or remove this pleasure unnecessarily. Nevertheless, there are other road users to consider, and we also know that our father is a kindly man who would be devastated were he to cause serious injury, or worse, to someone else.

Of course I understand that the final decision on this matter remains that of the DVLA.

Yours faithfully

loobeylou Tue 07-Oct-08 23:13:35

good letter, will def keep copy for poss future use

2boys2 Thu 16-Oct-08 14:10:12

any more news on this??

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