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to have spoken to DS1s teacher about yet another bloody trading card situation...

(35 Posts)
WilfSell Fri 26-Sep-08 22:36:59

DS came out of school today telling me he had 'found' a card in the playground and traded it with someone for 3 other cards.

I was not happy. I don't like trading at school full stop - it encourages exploitation and makes kids unhappy. The school tried to ban it last year and we had words with DS about it.

I pointed out (in the face of much hysteria from DS) that the card he found was not his so he was not entitled to trade it. I told him he should have handed it in to lost property.

I spoke to his teacher and told her what had happened. DS 'could not remember' who he had traded with hmm, so I told her he would be bringing back the cards on Monday for her to sort out.

He felt humiliated I realise because he hadn't realised he was doing anything others might find upsetting. But I had to point out to him, it was just like the people who happened to 'find' his football boots in the coats area and decide they were taking them home... He said 'yeah well they were only 25 quid'...

At which point I lost it and ranted about morality and poverty and asked how he would feel if I gave his new football boots to someone who had no parents to buy them shite like this.

Not a fun Friday evening but another moral lesson learnt? Or did I overreact and should have just ignored it and let whichever poor child had lost their possibly VERY important card (or more likely, been slightly pressured into trading by DS and his friends?) carry on feeling miserable.

God, it's not exactly the world financial crisis to resolve is it. But these little moral acts bother me.

ahundredtimes Fri 26-Sep-08 22:41:08

Hmmm.

Are you sure he didn't trade it, but told you he found it on the ground because he knows you disapprove of the trading?

chapstickchick Fri 26-Sep-08 22:42:38

I think your ds was behaving like many other little boys,I think you handled it well perhaps a little too sternly but in the long run he will learn from it.

I wish schools would ban these cards its a shame for kids that cant afford them, and it detracts from 'play'.

Dont be too harsh on your ds its over now and its weekend.

Blandmum Fri 26-Sep-08 22:42:40

banned where mine go, because of the hassle they cause

ahundredtimes Fri 26-Sep-08 22:43:03

Because that might have happened.

I got in a twist once with these cards, but then I was wrong about it because actually they have their own rules, and some kids trade without having ANY idea how valuable a card is and they just give them up and nobody is any the wiser.

I don't think it is all coercion and manipulation and stealing, but the rules can be vague.

ahundredtimes Fri 26-Sep-08 22:45:00

Ponce alert:

They tried to ban trading at ds's school. Then DS1 went to Head and proposed he set up a 'trading club' at lunchtime. Head v. good and patient man and he agreed. So who ever wanted to go to the club did, and brought cards in on that day. I understand DS1 ran an auction one lunchtime. [cringe] He is um, a bit, um

pointydog Fri 26-Sep-08 22:45:23

if children take these cards into school - an dparents let them - then they have to accept that they might lose them/have them nicked and no one's going to run around trying to sort it out. Whjat a waste of time.

I think you should have let your ds keep the cards. More fool the kids who took them in. The teacher shouldn;t have to sort this out.

saint2shoes Fri 26-Sep-08 22:46:14

ask the school to ban them
ds is now 16, but I can still remeber the hassle these stupid things caused.
a teacher should be teaching not sorting out crappy cards imo

ingles2 Fri 26-Sep-08 22:46:42

well,..you're right, but maybe a little overzealous?
This is why they should be banned. Gogos have just been banned at our school, I hope the same will happen when the new Match Attax comes out.

ahundredtimes Fri 26-Sep-08 22:46:52

See, the kid who gave up the valuable card doesn't know and doesn't care because he's been waiting for ages to get Paul Dacre from Derby which is the lamest card, or the Pokemon with the fluffy blue arse which nobody wants.

The rules are not as cut and dry as you think WS.

WilfSell Fri 26-Sep-08 22:46:55

Oh I dunno. I'm often sterner than I probably should be with DS1 cos he is hard work (because I am stern because he is hard work... etc etc) but lovely and mostly thoughtful.

I don't really know what happened and it isn't a massive deal. Maybe he didn't tell me cos he was worried what I would say but actually I think he was surprised I reacted and genuinely shocked that I wanted to intervene.

I bloody hate trading cards. Some kids HAVE been exploited and unhappy at his school. DS is, er, a lively personality and even with his own friends sometimes doesn't think what he's doing might be exploiting them.

ingles2 Fri 26-Sep-08 22:47:51

What a great idea 100x! Clever boy...
<think we'll have to pinch that one>

ahundredtimes Fri 26-Sep-08 22:48:04

I don't see why they have to be banned.

Some kid got fleeced, but he probably didn't know he was fleeced.

ahundredtimes Fri 26-Sep-08 22:50:03

Ingles between you and me, DS1 once did a comic and asked if he could sell it at school. It was a crap comic btw. Head said 'yes, our charity this year is Water Aid. DS1 MOST put out and grumbled 'I should have just sold it without telling him'. shock

I need WS to come teach this child some moral scruples.

I don't really understand what happened with the card and your ds1 WS. Also HOW do you know about it? I keep well clear.

ingles2 Fri 26-Sep-08 22:50:10

mine's the same WIll... ds1 thinks nothing of swapping a crappy gogo with 3 of ds2's best...and then looks amazed when I pull him up on it

ingles2 Fri 26-Sep-08 22:51:25

LOL 100x ..We need WS too

WilfSell Fri 26-Sep-08 22:53:06

Well, he did bound up to me after school shouting 'look, mum I got three cards today...' and I said 'but darling, I don't let you take cards to school anymore...?'

and it all came out...

WilfSell Fri 26-Sep-08 22:53:37

I shall be their official Moral Guardian. Do i get a badge?

ahundredtimes Fri 26-Sep-08 22:53:48

Ah.

ahundredtimes Fri 26-Sep-08 22:54:21

X-post.

Yes, yes, yes. I feel like I'm raising Jeffrey Archer over here, and believe me, that is NOT a nice feeling.

ingles2 Fri 26-Sep-08 22:54:55

oh yes Will grin
That's what amazes me about ds1 too,... the bounding thing I mean,...so bright, so sharp,so...dozy!

cornsilk Fri 26-Sep-08 22:55:42

Don't worry wilf it all evens out in the end. He'll go in with a gleaming new deck and come home with the tattiest, crappiest cards.

WilfSell Fri 26-Sep-08 22:55:51

Yeah. Suspect it will be easier all round if I don't try to teach him Morality but instead Keeping His Bloody Mouth Shut.

ingles2 Fri 26-Sep-08 22:57:13

LOL grin

ahundredtimes Fri 26-Sep-08 22:59:17

I still think that you don;t understand how the playground works, and that what he's doing isn't immoral. It's what everyone is doing ie. swapping cards.

Unless other child VERY upset, and your ds is actually 4.

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