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to simply give this buyer a refund on ebay as she appears to be a mad stalker?

(22 Posts)
newforold Tue 23-Sep-08 09:15:48

Sold a dress on ebay on Sunday.
I was away for the weekend, got back Monday morning. My ebay listings state that i will post items within 2 business days of payment.

I got an email from the lady early sunday evening asking whether i had despatched the dress yet and when it would arrive. Got another email from her yesterday morning.

I replied to the second email yesterday morning when i logged in and found the messages and checked that she had paid.

"dear xxx,

many thanks for your order and prompt payment. Your dress will be depatched via royal mail first class post tomorrow (tuesday) morning. This normally takes approx 2 working days to arrive.
many thanks,


I've now got another 2 emails stating i'm unreasonable and she wants me to "just communicate with me, that's all i ask" and "why can't you do a guaranteed courier"...

Can i just refund the nob and get rid of her? I have a feeling that she is going to be one of those odd ones who leaves nasty feedback for obscure reasons.

cupsoftea Tue 23-Sep-08 09:18:03

What did your postal section say? If you don't mention a courier & shedidn't contact you in advance of her bid then I'd just post it to her.

nickytwotimes Tue 23-Sep-08 09:18:41

Oh, yes. She sounds a bit high maintainance!

Lemontart Tue 23-Sep-08 09:23:24

def depends on your listing as cupsoftea said. Did you state Royal Mail first class or did you give other options?
If you stated RM 1st class then you can politely redirect her back to the original description and say it will be sold and delivered as advertised.
Don’t give her the refund just because she is hassling you about postage. There are a lot of bullies on ebay who think that they can demand anything as sellers are so desperate to avoid a bad rating. As long as you stick to your advertised postage, she has not got no room for arguing with you.

newforold Tue 23-Sep-08 09:26:36

Original listing states royal mail first class.

I think you're right. I'll pop it in the post now. I checked her other feedback and there are a few on there from sellers that mention her giving bad feedback unfairly.

ie along the lines of "prompt payer, unfortunately didn't communicate she felt there was an issue."

cupsoftea Tue 23-Sep-08 09:29:56

She can't complain then - and you've communicated with her. Some people just waste others time.

newforold Tue 23-Sep-08 09:31:30

I think you've hit the nail on the head cups.
I can't stand arsing around and for some reason this has irritated me somewhat. Oh well, perhaps my illustrious career selling on ebay should be curbed.....

sagacious Tue 23-Sep-08 09:33:29

She sounds like a loon BUT I wouldn't refund her.. send her an email stating your t & c and that you are complying with them. Post it as you've said and breathe. If she does leave you neg feedback you can respond and point all this out

cupsoftea Tue 23-Sep-08 09:34:02

newfold - don't let it put you off - good luck!!

blueshoes Tue 23-Sep-08 09:39:49

Hi newforold, there are nutters out there.

Strictly speaking, I don't think you are legally entitled to rescind the sale by giving her a refund. She has not asked for a refund. You cannot unilaterally back out of the sale. She can still leave bad feedback if you refund her, and you would be in the wrong.

Agree that you are acting in accordance with your legal rights by posting the item to her first class. If you wish, you can tell her that you are prepared to consider a guaranteed courier, though you are not obliged to, if she pays you the difference in postage. In some ways, if she is prepared to foot the difference, it is better for you to send guaranteed.

Hope it works out!

newforold Tue 23-Sep-08 09:48:48

Aww, thanks ladies. Advice as always much appreciated. smile

thanks cups.

How does this response sound?

"dear xx,

i have consulted the wise ones of mumsnet and they have agreed that you are indeed a total loon.
On that basis i am prepared to post your dress via courier if you pay the difference and promise not to eat my children.
The taller one in particular has a flatulence habit so would probably be inadvisable anyway.
I hope you get the help you need soon, if not i hope i won't be reading about you in the papers....
kindest and slightly frightened regards,


blueshoes Tue 23-Sep-08 09:50:10

Perfect. Sorted grin

expatinscotland Tue 23-Sep-08 09:53:16

don't refund her.

send her the dress.

then block her from bidding on your future auctions.

newforold Tue 23-Sep-08 09:59:29


expat i didn't know i could do that. Will do it now!

Pannacotta Tue 23-Sep-08 10:01:24

LOL at your last post newforold.
She sounds like a total loon, but wouldnt refund. Offer to courier her the dress is she pays the difference.
I avoid ebay these days, too many mad folk out there....

Bucharest Tue 23-Sep-08 10:04:23

Don't delete any of her nutjobbery messages either...I had a woman telling me I'd sent half a bottle of (expensive and posh) shower gel because she'd weighed it (FFS) against one of her own.....(it smelled foul, all I'd done was sniff it) She left me neg f/b and so I contacted ebay who were surprisingly on my side about it and deleted her neg comment. I see now she's no-longer-a-member.

cupsoftea Tue 23-Sep-08 10:11:05


StealthPolarBear Tue 23-Sep-08 10:12:27

I've just had an email from a seller on ebay who says that messages sent through ebay seem to be getting lost.
No idea if it's true but could this be what's happening? Or did she reply to an email you'd sent?

mygirllollipop Tue 23-Sep-08 11:13:48

Even if you refunded her she would still be able to leave feedback, and I can guess what that would be.

babymt Tue 23-Sep-08 11:58:46

Some people are never happy on ebay. Full stop.

I've had people accuse me of not communicating with them before and it turns out the ebay emails have either gone in their junk or they've got their email address wrong. If they've paid by paypal try sending the email there too.

If you want positive feedback then just grit your teeth and be polite...its hard I know! I've wanted to (and sometimes have) told my ebay customers to politely f*ck off. Didn't go down well!! wink

newforold Tue 23-Sep-08 14:38:10

Well I have posted the blardy parcel via Royal Mail first class now.

Hi stealth, all messages are going through ok, i copied them all to her email address as well....

I've now had an email telling me off for doubling up on communication and "jamming" her inbox. hmm grin

cupsoftea Thu 25-Sep-08 09:02:02

goodness newfold - lets hope that she'll give good feedback.

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