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to think that facebook is less about people's desire to keep in touch with friends and more about their desire to feel and be seen as popular?

(50 Posts)
wannaBe Fri 19-Sep-08 09:22:41

I get friend requests from people I bearly know. People who have just added me because they've added every familliar name on their "friends'" lists.

I have people on my friend list who have over 400 friends. hmm nobody really has that many friends.

So I have come to the conclusion that facebook has more to do with people's need to be popular, and to be seen as being popular, as all their friends can see when someone else wants to be their friend "x and y are now friends".

AbbaFan Fri 19-Sep-08 09:28:36

Oh yes, there are definitely people that use it as a competition for who's got the most friends.

Also it a great way to show off. I have one friend who use's it for this. Every holiday, new car etc is photographed. The status is all 'im off for dinner' 'in going on holiday soon' etc. So stupid.

peacelily Fri 19-Sep-08 09:31:27

I've had friend requests from randoms from school who I hardly remember. def used as a way of flaunting popularity.

Also used for smug status updates just to remind the world how well their doing, e.g. "x is sitting in his new pad in central London planning what to take to Thailand" and the like.

peacelily Fri 19-Sep-08 09:32:12

blush they're not their

daftpunk Fri 19-Sep-08 09:35:07

lol..i think you're right, iv'e never had point for me, iv'e only ever met about 3 people in my life that i'd wanna be friends with.

wannaBe Fri 19-Sep-08 09:39:24

oh yes had forgotten about the status updates. I know someone who put on her's "x is so proud of dd as we have been told she's so clever that she's being put on the gifted and talented register. She's the best in the class." where parents of children who are in this child's class can see it. Competitive parent? hmm

Although sometimes I wonder whether the status updates are to generate response rather than anything else? <<contemplates putting on my status that I'm sitting in my new pad planning a trip to thailand>> grin

Sanctuary Fri 19-Sep-08 09:42:19

WANNABE You have hit the nail on the head about facebook.

People let anybody on to their profile just so they look popular .I have had people from school asking me for the "friend request"I was`nt even at school when they were and have no clue who they are and would not know them if I passed em in the street.

SuperSillyus Fri 19-Sep-08 09:43:20

Maybe for some people but I use it to keep in touch with friends and family. And I use the status updates to moan and get sympathy grin and love nosying at other people's updates.
The people I know with loads of friends are using it to network and alot of their friends are work related.
I love to see people's holiday snaps, don't feel they are showing off, just sharing.

I don't get loads of friend requests but if I did, it would be awkward if I wanted to refuse, must admit.

2beornot2be Fri 19-Sep-08 09:43:32

LOL I have 498 friends on one of my facebook pages but thats for people that I do know and Promoters in London as I go out quite abit so know loads of them now :-0 I did start a new page for people I know friends and Family that has 128 friends on :-/ but I am friends with them all and they all live in Herts whilst I live in London so its could to keep in touch. My status usually say I am in a bad mood work was shit Grrrrrrrr stressed lol

2beornot2be Fri 19-Sep-08 09:44:02

Also can I say I don't add anyone they all add me.

allgonebellyup Fri 19-Sep-08 09:44:30

i couldnt agree more

its a farce, the whole thing.
fake and shallow.

Sanctuary Fri 19-Sep-08 09:45:38

2beornot2be U showoff grin

IndigoMoon Fri 19-Sep-08 09:46:40

i think there is competition for number of friends. i add people cos i am a nosey sod and want to look at peoples pics

i have most people on a very limited profile and only close people on my open people. for that i find it is a good way of keeping people up to date with my life. i find it hard to keep in touch with people so it is a great tool for that.

Megglevache Fri 19-Sep-08 09:47:23

Oh yes wannabe I completely agree with you.

I don't have very many friends on my list(about 45) they are mainly very old friends and family and a sprinkling of people I have met here and that like and that's it.

I get a bit spooked when people I have never heard of try to add me as friends, I ignore blush

Having said that there is one "friend" of mine who got in contact with me from my school and you should see her friends list- it's like a who's who. Russell Brand, Jaime Oliver, Bob Geldof- and you should see her pictures- forget competitive parents- this woman is another level.

I mentioned it in an e mail once and was very surprised at her answer!

SuperSillyus Fri 19-Sep-08 09:49:21

ooh what was her answer? [extremely nosey]

bethoo Fri 19-Sep-08 09:49:26

tbh i actually do use it to track down friends and i do ignore alot of friends requests. that is why i have less than 100 and dont care.

2beornot2be Fri 19-Sep-08 09:49:30

LOL Sanctuary I try not show off to much lol. I do have 1000 tagged photos of me on facebook though that are on other peoples profiles so I have to have all these friends to make sure the pictures are not that bad :-/

FioFio Fri 19-Sep-08 09:52:13

Message withdrawn

Botbot Fri 19-Sep-08 09:53:50

You're quite right. I still quite like it though.

Am locked in an unspoken battle with my brother to see who's got the most friends. He's winning by 5 at the moment, the big git. But I'm retaining the moral high ground because I never go and seek out friends myself, I just wait for them to come to me.

Completely pointless, I know.

Megglevache Fri 19-Sep-08 09:55:08

Super it was really lovely, modest and very sweet. She was saying that she'd seen my photos (of the children) and she had said that she would wish her life away,to have kids as gorgeous and as healthy,in a heartbeat.

Her photos back up her friends list BTW (she wasn't a nutty fantasist grin)and her house has been featured on TV lots. She asked me to pray for her to meet a lovely man who would marry her grin

Very recently she got engaged to a famous chap's wealthy brother - so maybe she's got her wish grin

Chequers Fri 19-Sep-08 09:57:51

It's like anything - you get out of it what you put in. If you use it to make
ke yourself look popular you will just have hundreds of random strangers on there.

I don't use mine to show off - I've moved around quite a lot and most of mine and DH's family aren't local so for me it's a great way to stay in touch and share photos with people I don't see very often.

SuperSillyus Fri 19-Sep-08 10:01:21

aww megglevache, I hope her wishes come true.

People always have their own troubles no matter how perfect their life may seem.

Megglevache Fri 19-Sep-08 10:02:42

True. Last time she was on TV she got an absolute roasting on here- talk about pitchforks shock Shame.

WilyWombat Fri 19-Sep-08 10:05:12

I dont understand the difference between being on facebook with 100s of psuedo friends or being on here with the same. Either you enjoy it or you dont.

I did struggle to understand the point of it to start with but quite enjoy it now. Most of my "friends" are family, close friends, people I know from Mumsnet or wives of hubbys friends - he is terrible at keeping in touch with people so it falls to me...fb is a less arduous way of doing it grin

It just means I can keep in touch with people without it being open to all & sundry and yes I know I could e-mail or phone people but quite honestly I cant be bothered blush

Sometimes I have looked at friends of friends and thought "oh I know her" but then decided not to add as a friend because I wouldnt consider them one in RL...more of an acquaintance.

Everyones definition of what constitutes a friend is different though isnt of my real friends considers everyone shes ever had a conversation with a friend...I tend to be more cautious and decide whether I actually like people before they become a friend. grin

SuperSillyus Fri 19-Sep-08 10:05:39

megglevache I noseyed at your profile there and your children are scrumptious and those shoes (I love shoes) sigh, gorgeous.

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