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To want to get married

(8 Posts)
YetAnotherNameChange Mon 15-Sep-08 16:47:51

I have been living with DP for a few years now, I have 2 DC from my first marriage and as does DP. DP's DC spend nearly every weekend here and have been doing for the last 2 years. Basically we all get on really well together as a family.

Dp and I have often spoke about getting married. We both agree that we want to spend the rest of our lives together but he is quite easy going about getting married where as for me it is really important and there is nothing I want more than to be his wife.

Its not that I want the big white wedding. I'm quite happy to go to the register office with just our close family and then go for a nice meal afterwards. I'd rather spend any money we have on a nice holiday for the kids and ourselves afterwards.

The thing is that I have gone on about getting married so much that now that DP has finally agreed I feel like I have badgered him in to it. I feel guilty and although DP says he does want to marry me I'm worried that he's only going along with it to keep me happy.

So am I being unreasonable? If DP really isn't bothered about getting married should I 'make' him do it.

meemar Mon 15-Sep-08 16:54:31

How did you come to agree to get married? Men often take longer to get into the idea of marriage than women.

Unless you got him in a headlock and browbeated him I'm pretty sure he wants to marry you. You can't 'make' someone marry you - he is doing it because he loves you and he has had plenty of time to realise it's what he wants.smile

Saturn74 Mon 15-Sep-08 16:55:45

Propose to him.

YetAnotherNameChange Mon 15-Sep-08 16:57:43

every time we talked about he he would um and arh but then we talked about it again the other day and he was like "yeah ok then".

I was really surprised to be honest and so happy but now I've had time to think about it I'm worrying a Little. Talk about never been happy!! [smile}

GrimmaTheNome Mon 15-Sep-08 16:58:43

If he's not bothered either way and you very much want to, then what's the problem? Go for it! It would be entirely different if he was actually reluctant.

i think being married is very important.

it's an outward sign of committment and also safeguards you legally and financially if anything should happen.

i understand your feelings though.i think he does want to marry you-perhaps he has a friend or a brother or maybe his mum that could quietly point out to him how nice it would be if here to propose and make a fuss of you?

ethanchristopher Mon 15-Sep-08 18:15:40

awww congrats

he wouldnt have agreed if he didnt want to go

much luck x

raspberrytart Mon 15-Sep-08 19:55:03

Me and my dp were together 18 years before we got wed, although i did want to, he did ask-and like you we just happily got along and the years past by

he wouldnt do it if he didnt want to - enjoy it and if he really wasnt bothered then he wouldnt agree

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