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To be annoyed that dp has put the heating on and lied about it.

(96 Posts)
twinsetandpearls Fri 12-Sep-08 21:38:23

Do does feel the cold really easily but under our present financial circumstances I have said I would like the heatin to stay off as long as possible. We must simply layer up and sit under blamkets. Dp agreed.
I also get very hot because of my medication and it makes me feel really ill.

Dp is a bit sniffly and when I came home the house was really hot, I said is the heating on, dp said no. He works from home. Just now I said to him it is really hot in here and I am feeling ill is it on and he said no. I said I will just check, he then had a minor paddy and said "My word should be enough why do you have to check." The heating was on, I have turned it off and have now had to open the door to let air in the house. Dp has gone to bed in a huff.

twinsetandpearls Fri 12-Sep-08 21:40:32

By the way this is one of those AIBU threads when I know I am right and don't want to be told otherwise. grin

zippitippitoes Fri 12-Sep-08 21:41:16


tho he is a bit naive if he thinks he could get away with it

it is like telling your mum that it was everyone smoking on top of the bus or you have only had two halvesa of lager

actually that worked for quite a while she jusat thought i got pissed really easily

nell12 Fri 12-Sep-08 21:42:28

He has gone to bed in a huff because he knows he is in the wrong!


twinsetandpearls Fri 12-Sep-08 21:42:40

Naive is not the word, bloody stupid is. I am more annoyed that he lied about the heating than putting it on tbh.

fairydust Fri 12-Sep-08 21:43:25

he probly lied as he knew you'd jump down his throat

onepieceoflollipop Fri 12-Sep-08 21:43:38

Do you have radiators (as opposed to a less noticeable form of heating?)

Surely it would be obvious immediately by touching the radiator that he was lying. YANBU

Soapbox Fri 12-Sep-08 21:43:39

He shouldn't have lied, but the fact that he felt the need to should tell you that he finds it hard to be honest with you. Why might that be?

If DH told me to turn off the heating when I wanted it on, I would probably decapitate himgrin

So I think you are being more than a little unreasonable!

twinsetandpearls Fri 12-Sep-08 21:45:04

I swear I didn't jump down his throat, I was disapointed that he gave up trying when it is not even cold. I simply said is the heating on? Perhaps in an accusatory tone I admit. blush Why can;t he put a jumper on?

Soapbox Fri 12-Sep-08 21:46:33

Jumpers are just not the same

DH has excelled himself tonight though, as he lit a fire in the open fireplace, with lots of candles too - all feeling cosy and romantic nowwink

FiveGoMadInDorset Fri 12-Sep-08 21:47:14

On another note how are you getting on with your new job. And yes YANBU as today was lovely and warm even with the downpours

PeaMcLean Fri 12-Sep-08 21:47:26

"he probly lied as he knew you'd jump down his throat"

ok, OP sounds a bit tetchy about this but on the other hand what sort of comment is "My word should be enough why do you have to check."

Do you need your heads knocking together???

twinsetandpearls Fri 12-Sep-08 21:48:23

yes it is radiator,

I hope he feels he can't be honest with me, God am I a cow? We agreed together not to put the heating on as long as we could bear it, firstly for money and secondly for green reasons. I can;'t make myself any cooler he can warm himself up. He does like the house like a sauna and dd and I hate it. Whenever guests come round they comment on it, at Christmas when we had guests every time he left the room we had to open the window. He has it so hot it is unhealthy.

PeaMcLean Fri 12-Sep-08 21:49:11

Sorry x posts.

I do agree with the jumper thing. DH will sit in shorts and a tshirt and complain about the cold. hmm

LuLuMacGloo Fri 12-Sep-08 21:49:53

Can I put in a plea on behalf of those who work from home. It does get really, really cold especially if you're just sitting in one spot working away with no detours to the water cooler to exercise the circulation.

Twinset - does your work place have heating on at the moment? If it does then I would say YABU in not letting him have a bit of heat. On the other hand if he was wearing a t-shirt at the time YANBU.

Can you suggest he works with a hot water bottle on his lap (my current mode of energy saving...)

twinsetandpearls Fri 12-Sep-08 21:50:16

Perhaps Pea! blush

I am tetchy because I am sitting in a tiny negligee and am so hot I have a headache.

I love my job I have reached educational nirvana.

Yes it is actually quite a muggy day here.

onepieceoflollipop Fri 12-Sep-08 21:51:18

Imo he should have discussed a compromise. For example agreed he would have the heating on for an hour or two while you were out. If he genuinely feels the cold then that should have been sufficient to get him warmer.

Where (roughly) do you live twinset? We are in the Midlands and have a digital thermometer which has been registering between 17 and 20 today. Not cold enough here for the heating, although of course the damp weather makes it seem colder.

twinsetandpearls Fri 12-Sep-08 21:51:24

I may apologise by taking him up a hot drink while I have a choc ice.

twinsetandpearls Fri 12-Sep-08 21:52:50

I am in Dorset, not sure of the temperature but I have been teaching with my windows open only closing them when the torrential rain started to make the kids work wet. grin

I think he has had it on all day as it is just so hot.

zippitippitoes Fri 12-Sep-08 21:53:10

i have been cold all summer it is always warmer out than in and as exp disnatled my sash window i cant open it or close it dsitto all ther windows in fact except the kitchen..they are in pieces just propped in the frame adn very draughty

but i am determined to last as long as poss

i just spend all my time in bed

one reason for desperation over a job

so he needs to develop some gumption or all hands to the pump home front stuff

twinsetandpearls Fri 12-Sep-08 21:54:26

No heating, my school is being rebuilt, I am teaching in a hut! He does work at home and I know he gets cold so I really would not moan if he put the heating on for a few days. But some days he puts on all the heating all day plus our little electric heater which sits right next to his desk.

LittleBella Fri 12-Sep-08 21:55:10

LOL. Yes I think YABU for not wanting him to have the heating on when he's cold, but YANBU for being annoyed with him for lying.

Re him being able to warm himself up, he can't if he's feeling a bit under the weather.

Could you compromise by having a convector heater in the room he is working in, but not the whole of the central heating on? That's what I've done recently - I am really nesh and I feel miserable if I'm cold, another sweater doesn't stop my feet, hands and nose being cold. Convector heater solves the problem of not wasting energy, they're very effective and cheaper than turning the whole central heating system on.

FiveGoMadInDorset Fri 12-Sep-08 21:55:11

Oh yes the rebuilding, they were just starting to do that when I left.

onepieceoflollipop Fri 12-Sep-08 21:56:26

I would recommend getting an accurate room thermometer. It has helped us to work out objectively if the house is truly cold.

Would that work for you twinset? If you could perhaps agree that no heating goes on unless temp dips below 18 or whatever limit you both set? (if one of you is ill with flu or similar then exceptions could be made!)

Can you turn off the radiators in some of the rooms so there are some cooler rooms in your home?

LittleBella Fri 12-Sep-08 21:56:41

oh well if he's got a small electric heater, he's BU. grin

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