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to dislike my bump being touched

(24 Posts)
Upwind Tue 09-Sep-08 11:53:25

Everyone seems to be at it now, including mothers with young children. I don't want to cause drama so allow friends and family to do it but I don't understand why it is okay!

Chequers Tue 09-Sep-08 11:57:46

No one touched mine except DH - I must look very unapproachable.

cheesesarnie Tue 09-Sep-08 11:58:58

yanbu.people do seem to think they have a right.when they touch your belly touch theres back -see what they say

Upwind Tue 09-Sep-08 12:00:26

grin cheesesarnie

why did I not think of that?

cheesesarnie Tue 09-Sep-08 12:01:23

winkyoull get a few odd looks but it will workgrin

Upwind Tue 09-Sep-08 12:01:40

Chequers, I am going to have to try and look more fierce

hollyandnoah Tue 09-Sep-08 12:02:35

People on the bus!!! touched mines i was like shock And then a girl who worked in Topshop did when i was looking for a
Christmas dress. I didn't know people actually did that - just touch strangers. Crazy.

Yanbu - they are strange! I'd never even think about rubbing a strangers belly.

cheesesarnie Tue 09-Sep-08 12:03:34

or say what you doing?when they say touching bump/baby etc say im not pregnant

im nasty

PeppermintPatty Tue 09-Sep-08 12:05:37


I didn't like it either, especially when it was a stranger or someone I didn't know very well.

I also didn't like it when people commented on the size of my bump (as in "OMG you're massive").

Upwind Tue 09-Sep-08 12:11:19

<sniggers> at "but I'm not pregnant!"

ElenorRigby Tue 09-Sep-08 12:12:57

I found it odd that people thought they could put their mits on me when I was pregnant! I wouldnt dream of doing that!

Upwind Tue 09-Sep-08 12:13:47

So with a unanimous YANBU from MN

WHY do people in real life keep doing it?

pingviner Tue 09-Sep-08 12:27:17

find intercepting hands and saying something with a smile like "I AM NOT A LUCKY BUDDAH!" usually works - Im really not a touchy feely person outside my own comfort zone. Most people seem to accept it and laugh - although I have asked a few complete strangers if they would come up and pat my abdomen if I was not pregnant - and when most look at you as if you are nuts - ask them why they feel its acceptable now? I know people dont mean anything bad by it but FFS my body plus baby, however much room we are currently taking up is still not public property...

MrsMattie Tue 09-Sep-08 12:28:22

I have tried really hard not to be precious about it with my second pregnancy and have even said 'yes of course!' smilingly when friends have asked if they can touch it. BUT...I still hate it. it makes my skin crawl. The only people I don't mind touching are my husband, mum and sister.

MrsMattie Tue 09-Sep-08 12:28:36

...oh and my 3 yr old DS! grin

JRocks Tue 09-Sep-08 12:31:16

YANBU, I hated it. I was in St Mark's Square in Venice when a crazy lady came up to me gabbling away nineteen to the dozen and then started stroking me shock

poppy34 Tue 09-Sep-08 12:31:45

am with pingviner...although strangely didn't happen to me much -must have perfected the don't you even try it lot (either that or was blatantly obvious that my temper was on a VERY short fuse throughout my pregnancy)


jamescagney Tue 09-Sep-08 12:32:16

and I will be the horrible person who says you are so lucky to have a bump. I'm 19 weeks pg and nada, can't wait to have a bump for people to comment on! Spose it is a bit soon...

poppy34 Tue 09-Sep-08 12:37:39

be careful what you wish for bump really at 19 weeks (was able to surprise some when annoucnced pregnancy at 20 weeks) 24 weeks howver it was another story!

Upwind Tue 09-Sep-08 12:41:13

James - my bump sort of popped out at about 19 weeks and that is when the trouble started.

I also hate comments about how small I am, and up until recently "are you sure you are pregnant at all" angry

AnguaVonUberwald Tue 09-Sep-08 13:04:33

yanbu, I hated this too apart from people I was really close too. One person at work who i had never even seen before touched it without asking for permission, just out of the blue, I totally flipped, which didn't seem to bother her at all!

Upwind Tue 09-Sep-08 19:09:12

The strangest time was at a funeral where I decided it would be really churlish to stop the grieving family from having a grope! I hope it brougtht them some comfort, circle of life and all that...

I've realised it might have a lot to do with the clothes I've been wearing. Winter woolies hopefully won't be so inviting.

notcitrus Tue 09-Sep-08 20:11:43

YANBU at all.
If they ask first, I don't mind - I can then put their hand on it.

But I hate being touched unexpectedly anyway and my bump's been rather sensitive (bizarre: there's been a squishy fat layer over my tummy for years, then as soon as I get pregnant it vanishes just as it would have been useful!). I spent weeks walking with my hands covering the bump just because it was painful when I walked into things!

One woman at work caught me unexpectedly and plonked her cold hand on my bump. My screams got the entire floor rushing over to check I was OK... very embarrassing but no-one else has tried to grope me since!

LadySweet Tue 09-Sep-08 20:14:31

yanbu - tummy touchers are infuriating!

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