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My mother has wound me up again, I think this is ridiculous

(9 Posts)
electra Sat 23-Aug-08 18:56:06

My daughters have gone away with their father to stay with his parents this weekend.

My parents do not like my ex-husband's parents for various reasons.

Today my mother said to me in all seriousness that she felt "hurt" because my 4-year-old daughter said yesterday that she loves her "other" grandmother. Apparently my mother thinks that this woman doesn't do anything for my dd's and that as such, dd2's expression of love is "unjust" I mean WTF????

I replied that I think she needs to grow up, how on earth could her mind run to something like that. And that dd2 should be allowed to think and feel whatever she likes without the ridiculous and unreasonable analysis it seems to have evoked. My mother also said that dd2 doesn't ever say she loves her(!) My mother openly favours dd1, but that is a whole other issue. But aside from anything, I was angry at the assumption from my mother that a 4-year-old girl somehow "owes" her something to make her feel good about herself!

Anyway, she is now sulking with me. Apparently I'm horrible because I don't have any sympathy with her. I think her behaviour is completely bizarre and unhealthy.

AIBU??

TheOldestCat Sat 23-Aug-08 18:58:29

You are not being unreasonable - your mum's behaviour is odd. Sorry you're having to put up with it.

TheArmadillo Sat 23-Aug-08 18:58:37

no. YANBU and you are right in your opinion of her behaviour.

PookiePodgeandTubs Sat 23-Aug-08 18:58:53

YANBU.

Give yourself a pat on the back that you can cope with your dds loving their other grandma too.

Your Mother must know deep down that that is reasonable, and a good thing! she just doesn't like it, which is different.

smallwhitecat Sat 23-Aug-08 19:00:30

Message withdrawn

AbbaFan Sat 23-Aug-08 19:00:32

YANBU

Your mum is being very silly.

zippitippitoes Sat 23-Aug-08 19:05:56

your mum is being dsilly

of course dd will/may love other people

she also probably has an immature concept of love at the moment too

but then so does your mum lol

and your mum should be mature enough to understand the concept of unconditional love as you say

and how are you

NumberFour Sat 23-Aug-08 19:19:25

yanbu.
my late mum was a bit like that too.
very hard work sometimes.

electra Sat 23-Aug-08 19:45:57

Thanks, all of you - she has been angry with me all afternoon about this. It's hard work indeed!

Hi zippi, I am ok thanks all things considered! How about you?

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