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I'm frying tesco value mushrooms for dinner, DH is talking about spending 25K on a car

(24 Posts)
apostrophe Mon 11-Aug-08 19:35:19

Message withdrawn

WorzselMummage Mon 11-Aug-08 19:37:43

We have this ALL the time. I buy my clothes in Primark Df wants a fecking LEXUS.

You are so not being unreasonable.

PersephoneSnape Mon 11-Aug-08 19:38:36

tell him he can buy it if he lives in it.

CuckooClockWorkOrange Mon 11-Aug-08 19:40:07

My x was like this. He had a chav subaru imprezza and I was criticised for spending too much on groceries (and also criticised if dinner wasn't up to much)

BabieWabbit Mon 11-Aug-08 19:47:38

Lol i agree with PersephoneSnape grin

shatteredmumsrus Mon 11-Aug-08 19:50:12

Maybe its a phase - mid life crisis. Tell him to wake up and smell the coffee!

Heifer Mon 11-Aug-08 20:21:45

or tell him to wake up and smell the tesco value coffee... grin

orangeduck1 Mon 11-Aug-08 20:29:05

wot is it with the other halfs,they dont really see the daylight, they moan when things are not from name brands but do they bring home enough to pay the bills, put name brands on kids that dont come out the secondhand shops and they want to have the best of every thing, and they wonder why we moan grrrrrrrrrrrr grrrrrrrrrr sorry having a relly bad day angry

HappyNewYearFeet06 Mon 11-Aug-08 22:34:19

My dh is the same. He wants a 'toy' car to mess about with. Yet I budget on the shopping trips etc...

I also pointed out to him that he spends £1500 a year on his lunches at work and 2 trips to the pub a week yet he then moans at me cos the phone bill is £30 a month?? hmm

NorthernLurker Mon 11-Aug-08 22:35:35

Pelt him with the mushrooms till he gets the message!

Boobalina Tue 12-Aug-08 09:36:26

OMG - you are married to my husband!!!

We lead financially different lives sometimes!

lilyloo Tue 12-Aug-08 09:38:29

But a 25k car is a necessity is it not where as dinner is a luxury! hmm

ThatBigGermanPrison Tue 12-Aug-08 09:44:01

You need to sit him down and explain what your budget is. Soome people aren't realistic about their own finances.

Am I the only one who isn't chortling indulgently and sighing "Oh, men!"? I think it's selfish and irresponsible - much like my friend who has not one child under three and a terminal pushchair habit while her husband is working 12 hour nights and taking flasks of tea to workl.

VictorianSqualor Tue 12-Aug-08 09:44:55

Lol, DP would get like this when we were planning on changing the car. He had a BMW 330 sport, his pride and joy, but along came another baby, and a new career for him including a 50 mile round trip every day and it was no longer practical, but he'd sit looking at Z3s and stuff, then tell me we needed to cut back on something.hmm

cafebistro Tue 12-Aug-08 09:46:31

I think that some men dont have the ability to prioritise....my fella will spend 100 pounds on a fishing bag and then reminds me that we havent much money this month when i tell him the baby needs new clothes as she's bursting out of the ones she's got....his suggestion is "tell her to stop growing!"

VictorianSqualor Tue 12-Aug-08 09:46:52

ThatBigGermanPrison, if like your friend, they actually do it, then yes, totally irresponsible, but for us DP would just pay lip service, he actually bought a 7seater diesel (practical) just spent a while doing it.

ThatBigGermanPrison Tue 12-Aug-08 10:18:33

Hmm, i think I'm too bitter and twisted for threads like this. Reminds me of when my ex insisted that as I had just spent £50 on clothes for myself, he was entitled to a playstation game.

They were maternity clothes.

And the pattern then continuted ... every penny I spent that wasn't food or bills, (for example, entertainment for the kids or clothes and shoes for them, shampoo etc) because expenditure that he felt he could legitimately match in the local computer shop. If I bought the children some winter clothes from Primark, he bought a new whatever-the-frick-computers-are-made-of.

And threads like this touch a nerve, because I can remember the pit of horror that opened in my stomach when it dawned on me that he would never, ever see anything or anyone as just as important as what he felt like spending time and money on.

I should remind myself that not all men are likt this, and I shouldn't keep charging in shrieking "Flay the barstid alive!!!!!!!"

VictorianSqualor Tue 12-Aug-08 10:32:50

TBGP, I had exactly the same from my XPangry Thankfully DP only pays lip service to these amazing purchase and more often than not spoils me with any spare money or I'd be exactly the same.

<<hands TBGP a whip>>

QuintessentialShadows Tue 12-Aug-08 10:37:18

There is a reason why most WOMEN stay at home, handle the house, children and their needs and education, finances, and general home admin, such multi tasking is way above most....

YANBU.
Men can do only one thing. Their jobs. wink

ThatBigGermanPrison Tue 12-Aug-08 10:51:02

<<clutches flensing knife>>

blueskythinker Tue 12-Aug-08 10:51:35

It pisses me off too - last year we paid £30k for a flipping saloon, which doesn't even fit our pram FGS and we have 2 small children. I wanted an estate Grrrrr.

I collect money off vouchers for tescos.

thefortbuilder Tue 12-Aug-08 11:45:35

yes i buy any new clothes for the dss or me on sale, and dh insited we needed to change our old estate (we'd had it 2 years FGS) for a 4WD - yes i know it's doubly bad blush - his excuse - we have 2dss now and need the room - what 7 seats????

and the thing just sits outside the house for 28 days out of the month

Notyummy Tue 12-Aug-08 12:04:08

They are not all bad hmm

My dh went to visit best mate (our best man) earlier this year. They had just bought a SAAB. Cue lots of disatisfaction with the Nissan Almera he drives and whining that he wants a SAAB. We sat down, disussed how much they are and whether we NEED a car of that bracket.....and we are now the owner of a Toyota Avensis.

I spend nearly as much money as him, but in lots of smaller purchases (clothes, face cream). He tends to go for cars and laptops. We both earn decent wages, and he would also talk to me before spending more than about £100 (unless he is buying me a pressie!) so I think it works ok.

Can quite appreciate that it must ve VERY annoying if he is expecting you to budget whilst blowing cash elsewhere, so YANBU.

TenaciousG Tue 12-Aug-08 13:02:23

lol, yanbu at all; my dp bought an iPhone with a year left on the contract of his old phone, then spent over £300 on top of that getting out of his old contract and porting his old number to his new phone. I ordered a load of books off Amazon for our dd, and he proceeded to moan and moan at me for forgetting to click for supersaver delivery, thus spending an unnecessary extra £7. hmm.

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