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AIBU?

...there should be a new topic area for people feeling fragile/ needing a supportive ear?

10 replies

cestlavie · 04/08/2008 10:20

Seriously.

There seem to be an increasing amount of threads where the OP comes on in either AIBU, Chat or Relationships wanting people's opinion on something which they think or believe. But when other posters don't support them, or even have a go at them, they become upset/ distressed/ mortally offended at this.

Now personally, I think generally if someone puts up a post asking for other people's opinions, they should expect what they get, i.e. a combination of support and approbation, providing it obviously doesn't spill over into personal attacks or spiteful comments so my inate response would be "You asked for opinions - don't whinge because they don't all agree with yours."

On the other hand, it's clear that some OPs genuinely just need (for whatever reason) a supportive, friendly and non-judgemental ear even if they are being utterly unreasonable. What do you think?

OP posts:
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NotQuiteCockney · 04/08/2008 10:23

I think it's a nice idea, but I fear that people wouldn't stick to it. I think that if people need a supportive, friendly and non-judgemental ear, they should be looking to a more structured sort of help.

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squilly · 04/08/2008 19:28

I've always found the camping thread non-judgmental and supportive!

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Califrau · 04/08/2008 19:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Shitehawk · 04/08/2008 19:41

Me too, Cali.

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zippitippitoes · 04/08/2008 19:45

i think for good or ill the response you get is always going to be unpredictable but the best way to get support is to try and express your op in such a way that you get a sympathetic response

posting in aibu is rarely going to achieve that

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zippitippitoes · 04/08/2008 19:46

mners also sometimes believe in tough love

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onepieceoflollipop · 04/08/2008 19:51

zippi that is true imo - and also some people need a bit of "common sense" talked into them. I know that sounds harsh but sometimes "there there dear" to someone who isn't taking any responsibility (as is sometimes the case" isn't helpful to the poster or people responding.

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noonki · 04/08/2008 20:08

I think it is a good idea as it allows people to post things without being got at and sometimes we all need that!

tough love is well needed too... but then there would be space for both

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JuneBugJen · 04/08/2008 20:10

INWYM

I am always horrified when someone comments how trivial the thread is, if the thread isn't trivial to that person!

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Shitehawk · 04/08/2008 21:13

If someone is feeling fragile, though, they simply have to say so and generally people are much kinder. They also have to think and be a little more selective where they post; every regular poster is well aware that AIBU is not the place to put your thread if all you want is gentle agreement.

If people are too fragile to take other poster's comments on board without getting distressed or mortally offended then NQC is dead right - they need a different kind of support, one that a website like this simply cannot give.

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