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do i REALLY have to explain why me and dh rent our house?

(218 Posts)
spudFace Thu 31-Jul-08 19:06:09

we have been together for 20 years and have never had loads of money to save for a mortgage. what makes it worse is that my parents are very well off and have watched us struggle (and suffer) over the years. I am sick of telling people that i rent cos of all this but should i have to? i know that this subject will come up in conversation tomorrow with some new friends i have made recently. Am sick of the puzzled looks i get when i say I RENT MY HOUSE!!

what CAN i say to just tell people its none of their beeswax?

FluffyMummy123 Thu 31-Jul-08 19:10:09

Message withdrawn

Fimbo Thu 31-Jul-08 19:11:35

Rent, own what does it matter?

spudFace Thu 31-Jul-08 19:11:36


spudFace Thu 31-Jul-08 19:11:56

icod - why is it odd? how odd!

mankymummy Thu 31-Jul-08 19:14:19

i couldnt afford my house now if i hadnt got on the property market 20 years ago.

tell them you are glad you dont own with the current state of the housing market.

infact i think the uk is quite unique in the percentage of home ownership.

Uriel Thu 31-Jul-08 19:15:32

If you're bothered, lie!

lurkingdad Thu 31-Jul-08 19:17:12

Tell them that a recent survey calculated that current house prices mean it is now cheaper to rent than buy, you are taking the more cost effective approach but just chose to take it long before every one else jumped on the bandwagon. And don't forget to remind people of all the DIY and maintenance that is not your problem.

spudFace Thu 31-Jul-08 19:17:25

to be honest i do frown upon people that live together with kids who are not married so I suppose that would really offend people - some people dont get married because they can not afford it!

TheSoapEatersMum Thu 31-Jul-08 19:18:31

My mum still rents her house too, and she also gets comments. It isn't odd, if you can't afford to buy! It's sensible.

Upwind Thu 31-Jul-08 19:20:50

I find it a useful friend filter. People really do turn up their noses quite often when they hear we rent. Reveals them as ignorant snobs smile

Don't explain further unless pressed, and then go with mankymummy's suggestion and cut off further enquiry by saying you are glad you don't own right now with the way prices are falling. If they keep on about it ask whether they could honestly afford their current home if they had to buy it now? And explain that is the position you find yourselves in for various reasons.

bigpolarbear Thu 31-Jul-08 19:20:53

spudface, why do you need money to get married?

wotulookinat Thu 31-Jul-08 19:21:08

We rent. I used to have a mortgaged place but couldn't afford the upkeep.
Ignore Cod. She's weirdo.

Tortington Thu 31-Jul-08 19:22:03

why would you explain?

just dont - i have alays rented until recently - and no one ever said
"but why do you rent?" no- one ...ever!

and if they did i reckon i would say something about capitalist society making the rich richer

nnot thewayfor a nice light hearted convo grin

LyraSilvertongue Thu 31-Jul-08 19:22:21

Spudface, you frown upon people who live together with children but aren't married?
That's me and DP. Why do you frown upon us? We've been together eight years and haven't got round to getting married what with having young children and all.

wotulookinat Thu 31-Jul-08 19:22:55

Bigpolarbear, my partner and I would love to get married but can't afford to. At the very least, you need the money to register the bans (or whatever it is) and at least £40 on the day for the registry office.

mankymummy Thu 31-Jul-08 19:23:17

why do you frown on people with kids who arent married?

what on earth do you feel about single parents then?!

LoveDietCoke Thu 31-Jul-08 19:23:27

weddings are expensive bigpolarbear - thats prop what she meant?

we rent too - this is more or less cos of never raising enough for the flippin deposit!

expatinscotland Thu 31-Jul-08 19:24:01

it's odd?

cod, you're so English your profile should be on a postage stamp..

wotulookinat Thu 31-Jul-08 19:24:13

Hey Spud, I'm not frowning on you renting (coz we do too), so no need to look down on us un-married people.

JonahTakalua Thu 31-Jul-08 19:25:04

There is a lot of frowning in your world, spudface.

Frown not upon those living over the brush, lest they frown upon your lack of mortgage.

piratecat Thu 31-Jul-08 19:25:12

I think, for me to hear that you rent after 20 yrs together, does sound not the norm. Lets think, tho, 1987, what were house prices doing then? Wasn't there a bit of a price rocket going on then, and then a real slump in the early 90's.

I remember that me and ex dh only got onthe housing ladder back in 97 becuase prices were really affordable. We had a 2 bed place in london for a mortgae of 300 quid!!!

Did you ever consider it at certian times? I only ask cos it depends onwhat the market was doing.

Upwind Thu 31-Jul-08 19:25:29

Custardo, you clearly hang out with a better class of people grin

We are always being asked. When we say we can't afford it they often mention that some overpriced and tiny flats are being sold in a sink estate somewhere that we could certainly afford. I ask whether they would want to raise there children there? With no storage space, little living space and dangerous neighbours? Especially given that renting a comfortable home is much cheaper.

StellaWasADiver Thu 31-Jul-08 19:26:33

Why should I get married just because I live with the father of my child?

expatinscotland Thu 31-Jul-08 19:26:40

i never get asked.

but then, IRL, people rarely ask me things that are none of their business, because i don't ask them things that are none of mine.

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