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Am I being unreasonable in feeling people should respect me enough to allow me to sleep

(38 Posts)
busymum1 Wed 30-Jul-08 08:05:46

Long moany one Sorry!!!! I went to bed at 10.30pm which I feel is a fairly reasonable time at 12.22am my mobile is ringing I ignored it as was still half asleep but woke my ds2 up who is a notoriously bad sleeper an hour later at 1.30am he fell back asleep turns out call was from my friend - she has mental health issues so was trying to let me know I did not need to phone her at 7.15 as normal to make sure she is up for work as she was staying at her friends house for the week. I can see her prespective was I did not need to as her friend would wake her but she could have told me this morning when I phoned that she did not need me to do this again till monday or phoned me at an earlier time of night because sure she did not arrange to go there after midnight. I get back to sleep at 2am and my phone starts again at 04.36am (again wakes ds2 another hour awake!)is a parent I childmind for, she has got to go somewhere at 10am and can't take her children with her can I have them for her, I appreciate is serious where she has to go and she can not miss going but she could have phoned me at 8am also wednesdays is my day off so chances are I would have no children so would not have to worry about ratios and arranging things to be able to do this.
Promptly at 7am the builders round the corner started their machines so end of sleep for the night as ds2 awake again as is dd1

Oblomov Wed 30-Jul-08 08:07:44

YANBU. Totally disgusting. The menatl health one I could understand. But the mum ???

2point4kids Wed 30-Jul-08 08:11:06

Bizarre of the Mum to call you at 4.30am shock
I would say to her sorry you cant have her DCs as you are too tired through lack of sleep, otherwise you would have done.

BouncingTurtle Wed 30-Jul-08 08:20:28

Simple solution - switch your voicemail on and mobile off!

belgo Wed 30-Jul-08 08:22:06

Keep your phone off at night. Can't believe the mother phoned you at 4:30!

LazyLinePainterJane Wed 30-Jul-08 08:22:12

So what did you say to the mum who called you so early?

nametaken Wed 30-Jul-08 08:46:08

Why on earth don't you keep your phone switched off at night shock

woodenchair Wed 30-Jul-08 09:02:01

what a bizarre OP. the situation is totally in your control, turn your phone off!

2point4kids Wed 30-Jul-08 09:04:04

I wouldnt think to switch my phone off as I dont expect anyone to call unless it is an emergency.
If it was an emergency then I'd like to know about it, so worth having phone on I think.

margoandjerry Wed 30-Jul-08 09:06:39

good grief I can't believe what you have to put up with.

Someone (a customer basically) ringing you at 4.30? I would go ballistic.

I am practically on lockdown after 9.30. Hate anyone ringing after about 10ish and if I was woken at 4.30 I would assume it was because of a death in the family. angry for you.

I don't turn my phone off because I expect people to behave appropriately and because if there is an emergency I want to be reachable.

FWIW the builders round here are not allowed to start noisy work before 8am so you could perhaps tackle that one or threaten to ring the council.

MrsTittleMouse Wed 30-Jul-08 09:06:54

I don't switch my phone off at night - what if someone needs to contact me as an emergency? I am gobsmacked that a mother thought that it was fine to phone you at 4.30am! Surely even if she was desperate she could have waited until 7am??? shock

MrsTittleMouse Wed 30-Jul-08 09:07:47

Actually, I wonder if this is indicative of her general attitude to you - I pay you to work for me, therefore I own you - ???

lulumama Wed 30-Jul-08 09:09:19

i never turn mobile off as i use it as my alarm and if someone needs me urgently, they will ring it.

i would expect clients to call at a reasonable hour, i would say 07.30 would be ok, but 04.30 is just bizarre... maybe she was expecting your phone to be on voice mail though?

chelsygirl Wed 30-Jul-08 09:09:27

is this mum crazy or what? 04.36 ringing you, hope you give her what for

busymum1 Wed 30-Jul-08 10:09:39

keep my phone on as am on call as social workers can ring me regarding one of my friends as I am one of three carers for her so need to be on standby, also what if an emergency with my family nobody could get hold of me I also take emergency referals for childminding if no foster carers available for social services emergencies

Ripeberry Wed 30-Jul-08 10:19:40

Well, there is nothing you can do then, if you don't like the phone ringing switch it off, if you some sleep.
Seriously, in how many years have you had an "emergency call" in the middle of the night?
If you are very tired and need a good nights sleep then turn your phone OFF!
The whole world is not going to collapse around your ears just because your phone is not on.
People are just too rellient on mobile phones, they are just a ball and chain.
Can't you tell i don't like them grin

themildmanneredjanitor Wed 30-Jul-08 10:24:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mrsruffallo Wed 30-Jul-08 10:30:23

Why don't you just turn your mobile off?

busymum1 Wed 30-Jul-08 10:36:28

have already explained why don't turn phone off and mother phoned both phones was landline that woke ds2 up if you unplug phone then people who ring don't know its unplugged and just keep ringing also do you all turn your phones off every night and unplug them?

mrsruffallo Wed 30-Jul-08 10:38:58

The mother phoned both phones at 4.30?
What on earth did you say to her?

MrsTittleMouse Wed 30-Jul-08 10:41:35

I don't understand this. Someone phoned with a (non-urgent) call at 4.30am and yet somehow it's all busymum1's fault. How does that work then? I know that emergency phone calls in the middle of the night don't happen very often, but when they do, you want to be able to take them! In our family we've had people rushed to hospital in the middle of the night, we can't be that unusual.

TotalChaos Wed 30-Jul-08 10:44:22

I agree with Mrs Tittlemouse. YANBU.

bellabelly Wed 30-Jul-08 11:18:47

Poor you busymum. To be honest, I might assume that mobile would be switched off overnight and therefore call at unsociable hour to leave a message BUT wouldn't dream of calling a landline after about 9.30pm.

Interesting that so many people leave mobile on overnight in case of emergency - hadn't ever thought of that, just assume that everyone switches off at night.

VictorianSqualor Wed 30-Jul-08 11:26:36

I can understand needing to be available for the emergency calls but would probably just use my landline for that.

However, why on earth this mother called you at 4:30 is beyond me.
Especially as she called both phones so obviously knew you were asleep, was she in this country when she called??

As for your friend could she not have just texted?

TheFallenMadonna Wed 30-Jul-08 11:29:16

I would be having very stern words with the mother. Very stern.

I am shock at 4.30. WHat was she thinking? WHy was she up then?!

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