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to not want to buy a card for every event or anniversary ...?

(25 Posts)
beanieb Mon 28-Jul-08 15:14:27

Someone has just told me I should be buying family members anniversary cards. Thing is, in my small family we really don't have a history of this kind of behaviour. I will buy wedding cards, I will buy birthday cards, hell I will even buy a congratulations on your baby being born cards but do I have to send other members of my family a card to congratulate them on being together for a year or 2 or 3 and on and on?

Am I being mean and uncaring?

cheesesarnie Mon 28-Jul-08 15:15:32

i dont and its amazing how much money you save.and think of the trees!sometimes dc make cards but i dont hardly buy any anymore

flowerybeanbag Mon 28-Jul-08 15:16:06

YANBU, I don't. I'd buyan anniversary card for 25 years or similar, but not annually.

Who says you 'should' - a member of your family who has not received one?

beanieb Mon 28-Jul-08 15:17:04

oh no - I don't think my family would give a toss. It's people I work with. I guess it's just a different way of doing things.

flowerybeanbag Mon 28-Jul-08 15:21:04

You are perfectly normal imo

crazymummy84 Mon 28-Jul-08 15:23:50

I have never recieved anniversary card, neither have i send them, (except for 25 years etc). I've never thought anything of it. I doubt you family do either, I wouldn't worry.

wheresthehamster Mon 28-Jul-08 15:24:13

Who gives a hoot about how long someone's been married? I have enough trouble remembering birthdays.

BouncingTurtle Mon 28-Jul-08 15:25:46

If it was a big anniversary like a silver or diamond then yes, but not every year - I think the greetings cards industry takes enough of our money!

kaz33 Mon 28-Jul-08 15:25:58

We missed our second wedding anniversary, only realised that we had when we received a card from my parents grin

I really put little store on cards except for children.

hearnoevil Mon 28-Jul-08 15:30:44

this is a cause of argument for me every year at anniversary and valentines day.

Anglepoise Mon 28-Jul-08 15:33:30

Hee hee <waves>

No way. IMO an anniversary is between the couple in question (no matter how much they bang on about it wink), not anyone else. I always find it a bit odd that my housemate and her siblings buy their parents wedding anniversary presents - I don't really know when my parents' wedding anniversary is!

beanieb Mon 28-Jul-08 15:44:00

ok - I feel less guilty now. Maybe I should just accept that my work mates are the odd ones and I am perfectly normal!

Mutt Mon 28-Jul-08 15:46:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cies Mon 28-Jul-08 15:49:20

I agree Anglepoise. Anniversaries are to do with the couple, not anyone else. smile

Unless the couple in question are having a party, e.g. for a silver or golden wedding anniversary, when as a guest you might be expected to get a card or a present.

StormInanEcup Mon 28-Jul-08 15:59:52

Message withdrawn

rookiemater Mon 28-Jul-08 16:02:58

It is thank you cards I hate. Someone sends you something and you then have to go and buy a blinkin card, write it and post it.

If men really ruled the world, there would be no such thing as cards, and it would be a better place for it.

beanieb Mon 28-Jul-08 16:04:02

I have one particular work mate who buys cards for everyone for everything! She also tells me how many cards she gets for everything (even sympathy cards), by this I mean she will come to work and say 'I had 57 birthday cards/Sympathy cards, that's 10 more than last year'

Now she has had a couple of bereavments in the last few weeks and of course because I work closely with her I did buy her a sympathy card both times, But I wouldn't buy her and her husband an anniversary one even though I know if I were married she would get me one EVERY year. Then I wouldn't buy my close family one either.

Of course if it were a 'special' anniversary or a baby then I would buy a card, but only for my closest friends and relatives.

Upwind Mon 28-Jul-08 16:06:30

I have been astonished to get anniversary cards each year from DH's entire family. I never even knew such things existed.

I hate birthday cards from people who are there to celebrate - surely they should be to let people further away know you are thinking of them? I hate fathers' day cards, mothers' day cards, valentine's cards etc...

combustiblelemon Mon 28-Jul-08 16:21:06

My family send anniversary cards, but my husband's family only send anniversary cards to my MIL/FIL. So we send them one every year, but never get any sent to us!

theonlyfemale Mon 28-Jul-08 16:29:02

i love sending cards! Will send one for any occasion. A lot of my family and close friends have moved all over and i like to remind them that i still think of them and love them!

And plus i love receiving them back! Makes me feel special! grin

Upwind Mon 28-Jul-08 16:32:23

The reason I hate recieving cards is it makes me feel guilty for not sending them! Those of you who always send them, are you hurt when others forget/don't bother?

theonlyfemale Mon 28-Jul-08 16:34:32

No not really - but have been known to throw a strop and dp when he forgets! Tears have rolled! {grin}

Upwind Mon 28-Jul-08 16:36:53

I don't remember my DH ever giving me a card of any description. He probably did back in the early days though.

I was annoyed one year when we were living abroad and he forgot about Christmas shock

theonlyfemale Mon 28-Jul-08 16:40:34

I think it shows that an effort has been made! Love it when my boys make me big cards with glitter etc!

Funny at xmas in our office because there s always people coming in from different depots, so i keep a few spare in my bag and write them in the loo! Everyones always saying how nice i am! He eehehe

SugarBird Mon 28-Jul-08 23:12:13

Anniversary cards for other people? Nope! Anniversary cards for dp? When we remember blush.

My dad has turned into a bit of a card pain in recent years. We actually had a huge row after father's day because my dcs didn't send him a card. They give one to their own dad and I sent one (and an enormous box of chocs!) to my dad but he was absolutely furious that he didn't get one from the grandchildren... He's 86 so I expect the odd eccentricity but that came right out of left field!

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