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AIBU?

to not like holding hands

15 replies

TinkerBellesMum · 28/07/2008 13:57

Actually I know I'm not, but I thought if I put this here it might get some discussion.

I have treated a few children and my dad has seen many more who have fallen over whilst they were holding hands with their parent. Parents instinct is to hold on and the child ends up with a spiral fracture. For those who don't know what one is, a child's bones are softer than an adults and can twist. What happens is they spin round from their arm which stays still at the hand because it's held, causing the bone to "spiral".

Tink falls over so much that it brought back for me all the toddlers I've seen that have had this injury.

Please don't get me wrong, I don't let her wonder around without holding onto her, what I do instead is get her to hold my hand, I put my thumb against the back of her hand so that I can hold on if she tries to run off, but I'm not holding her if she fell.

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HonoriaGlossop · 28/07/2008 14:19

yes my BIL dislocated his daughter's arm while holding on to her as she tripped up some steps!

My ds simply had to be held when a toddler in public places, as he was a darter - but we used reins alot. Probably find there are numerous injuries allied to use of reins now!

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edam · 28/07/2008 14:21

Interesting post, TBM.

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edam · 28/07/2008 14:29

MI told me her childminder encouraged the children to have their hands free so they could stop themselves if they fell over. Clever lady.

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TinkerBellesMum · 28/07/2008 14:34

That's true edam, you're less likely to hurt yourself when your hands are free. Something I missed from my first post is that the injuries from actually falling over are far better than the injuries to a child from hanging from a parents arm.

HG, my dad dislocated my nieces elbow and wrist from picking her up by her hands - you'd think he'd know better, he's a radiographer!

I had to stop using reigns as she would swing from them. I have a picture of her dad carrying her down the road like a handbag!

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edam · 28/07/2008 14:38

Oh, that's like the old line about cobbler's wives going barefoot and doctor's wives dying young... radiographer's grandchildren end up with complex fractures!

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VinegarTits · 28/07/2008 14:44

Actually this is interesting to know as ds does this a lot when holding my hand but i never knew i could casue him an injury ! I will definately thing twice now before holding onto his hand too tightly and encourage him to be hands free as much as poss, so thinks for the heads up

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VinegarTits · 28/07/2008 14:45

that sould say Thanks not 'thinks'

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TinkerBellesMum · 28/07/2008 14:59

Yeah, the amount of "just put a plaster on it"'s that my dad has come out with when the plaster needed was "of Paris"! He does know though that you don't hold a child's hand, he's seen some of mine when he's been dropping me at a duty and still there when we've had them come in. Obviously he can't treat them (but then the only thing you can do is go to A&E) but he can recognise them better than we can.

There's nothing wrong with them holding you VT, as long as you aren't holding them so tight you don't let go when they fall, if they slip through your hand they won't hurt them self and can put their hand out quicker.

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sandy4 · 28/07/2008 15:11

omg! i didn't realise that could happen . i'll let go rather than hold on next time. thanks for that!

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bigpolarbear · 28/07/2008 15:19

Good post Tinkerbell, I see what you mean, you coulsd end up doin more harm, ouch!!

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Turniphead1 · 28/07/2008 15:31

That's an interesting post Tink. Presume crossing the road is ok so you can hoist them out of the way when a juggernaut refuses to stop for the zebra crossing...

In general I try and get my children to learn to walk beside me rather than the holding hands/reins approach, so that kind of fits in. There is nothing more cute though than a little pudgy hand in yours though, eh!

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TinkerBellesMum · 28/07/2008 16:22

That's why I said I make her hold my hand and keep a thumb on the back of her hand, I still have control if something happens and TBH if I dislocate something or give her a spiral pulling her out the way of something crossing the road I wouldn't be as upset as I would be if she got it falling over.

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sandy4 · 28/07/2008 17:23

so the 1...2...3...wheeeeeeeeeeeee (swing child by hands in the air) is completely out of order? i used to love that when i was little.

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TinkerBellesMum · 28/07/2008 17:35

As long as you don't let go! It's when they're hanging from one hand they're at risk. Holding their hand when there's someone else holding the other is ok as long as you know they'll not let go.

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TinkerBellesMum · 28/07/2008 17:37

Tink loves that game too.

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