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You know its time to loose weight when....

(21 Posts)
lucyellensmum Sun 27-Jul-08 19:13:54

You approach your other half for a bit of morning nookie, they say no because they don't want to get too hot, then follow it up with "you really need to loose some weight babe" angryangry

I have noticed he is a bit less "keen" these days, i put it down to our financial problems, but now at least i know the truth

The thing is, i AM overweight, i could lose about 3 stone shock, but i LIKE my body blush

posieflump Sun 27-Jul-08 19:17:23

Good for you that you like your body
Ignore him
He sounds horrid (hope you don't mind me saying)

RubySlippers Sun 27-Jul-08 19:17:25

farking hell

there was another thread about this earlier today - inappropriate comments before/during or after sex

if you like your body, great! your DP should love it too

if YOU want to lose weight then do it

confidence is so sexy - your DP is a dope if he doesn;t realise this ...

lucyellensmum Sun 27-Jul-08 19:23:05

Posie, he does sound horrid doesn't he - but he isn't. That is why i am so angry. He is only being truthful and he is by no means on the right side of the BMI scale so it is something we have both said to each other - but it was his timing that has made me feel like shit.

I'm quite a sexual person and i still do little dances for him, well - not any more i don't hmm

lucyellensmum Sun 27-Jul-08 20:38:56

well i guess there is not much left to say really is there

TheHedgeWitch Sun 27-Jul-08 21:12:15

Message withdrawn

ByTheSea Sun 27-Jul-08 21:14:43

I've put on a lot of weight myself and am probably in the same situation. I wish I could feel like you and like my body, but I have a bit of a complex. On the other hand, my DH keeps telling me not to worry about it and he finds me really sexy. We just can't win, can we?

PootyApplewater Sun 27-Jul-08 21:19:33

For someone who isn't horrid, his timing and tact could do with some serious work.

It is one thing if you are both concerned for each others' health, and agree to perhaps work together to lose some weight, if that is what you both want.

It is another thing entirely to rebuff your sexual advances by saying "you really need to loose some weight babe".

Does he know how upset you are, and how this has knocked your confidence?

lucyellensmum Sun 27-Jul-08 21:25:56

What i actually need to know is, does it make him not attracted to me anymore? Or was he being a man and having crap timing.

I have said the same thing to him, although not after turning down his sexual advances, i still fancy the pants off of him, in fact he is more sexy to me now than then. How can i accept that he still fancies me?

This is actually an interesting situation. We have both put on weight over the years, i was a size 10 when we met, im now a size 20. Am i being unreasonable to expect him to fancy me still? I mean, its not what he paid in for is it? So maybe im asking a lot from him to still want to, well, you know??

lucyellensmum Sun 27-Jul-08 21:27:50

He knows because i told him, he said, and i quote "I don't have time for more of your bullshit" shock, then THEN he said to me - would you mind typing some invoices up for me when i get back from loading my van. I think his brain is on strike today

FluffyMummy123 Sun 27-Jul-08 21:28:24

Message withdrawn

lucyellensmum Sun 27-Jul-08 21:30:26

I do have to be fair though, i HAVE put on weight recently, although ive been big for a good long while now - but the tops of my legs bother me - so they need to be sorted out, But thats what it should be about really isnt it? ME, the tops of my legs bother ME??? Not him, arsewipe, who only knows what his cock looks like because i describe it too him, its been so long since he has seen it over his gut!

I do have great tits though, i mean, they are HUGE!!! And ive always had those wink

lucyellensmum Sun 27-Jul-08 21:31:22

COD - feck off!!! i winced when i saw your name and had to scroll down to the message grin. Lets just say they have a burlesque feel to them!

FluffyMummy123 Sun 27-Jul-08 21:31:51

Message withdrawn

lucyellensmum Sun 27-Jul-08 21:35:41

that could work, i mean, i can get quite a rush from a workout, i wouldnt technically need his services then would i? Ive just posted on your health thread btw cod.

horace Sun 27-Jul-08 21:38:48

I'd recommend lots more dancing - but don't let him touch. that'll serve him right.

hearnoevil Sun 27-Jul-08 21:42:33

it's tough to know.
his timing was without a doubt shocking and he was far from tactful.
but if someone is honestly no longer physically attracted to their partner what are they suppossed to do?
i mea obviously he should have just tactfully rebuffed your advances and then brought up the subject at a later date when you may not have felt as vulnerable.
but surely he had to say something at some point.

ScottishMummy Sun 27-Jul-08 21:45:43

lem, please don't take this wrong way but do you need to post the minutiae of your relationship

do you really need folk commenting on your relationship.

after all you have invited comment.

what if you are unhappy with responses

self-confidence isn't a dress size

it isn't wee "dances"

start with loving yourself

lucyellensmum Sun 27-Jul-08 21:54:08

Scottish mummy, why is it you see right through me?

Janni Sun 27-Jul-08 21:59:35

He was tactless. You sound great. I agree with Scottishmummy about not opening yourself up too much on here - take care of your heart.

ScottishMummy Sun 27-Jul-08 22:04:11

lem deep breath step back look at your positives not your jeans size

mn is fun but hey imo don't post on AIBU expecting empathic responses. you wont get them

what if someone rolls along and calls your DH a twat. You get defensive/anxious need to defend him etc

re-read your thread.have you actually said anything positive about yourself.

you are a bright clever lady with self deprecating tendencies

thing is if you keep putting the boot in yourself you will start to believe it

thing is if someone else posted this. you would be straight in with supportive comments

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