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to not go up to DD when she is crying as our situation has changed

(16 Posts)
StarSparkle Sat 26-Jul-08 16:38:27

Have just spilt from DP...he told me to go and for once I have done so...round to parents house (they are away at the moment) We haven't spoken for 4 days.

Luckily, DD (2.5) and me where living with M&D until she was a year old so she knows the house well what with us going over every so often since.

She is very over tried so have put her to nap upstairs in a room she knows, with fav toy, juice ect.

She is screaming and I feel guilty as it must be such a change for her... but she does so need to sleep as needs it.

She is calming down but I can't help but feel that I am being horrid.

I'm really want to keep her in routine as she hasn't seem upset at all since we left but do to the stress of it all am starting to doubt myself.

Advice/comments please.

RubySlippers Sat 26-Jul-08 16:41:05

well she has also been through a big unpheaval

she is probably hot and extra tired as well

she needs extra cuddles right now = don't get to caught up in needing to stick rigidly to a routine - 2.5 year olds can be fairly adaptable

electricluluarella Sat 26-Jul-08 16:41:41

i would comfort her and go to her!

YABU, this is a real change for her, she must realise she is not longer at home, and her dad is not there, and you are stressed and her grandparents are not there

she is a toddler, her whole world is upside down, go and cuddle her, or take her into your bed with you for a sleep

she needs security and comfort right now

routine can wait until things are more setteld

electricluluarella Sat 26-Jul-08 16:42:15

<<Hi rubY!>>

sorry, meant to say, i am sorry your relationship has ended, must be very difficult for you too.

RubySlippers Sat 26-Jul-08 16:44:09

<<hello lulu>>

StellaWasADiver Sat 26-Jul-08 16:44:24

Of course YABU, go and comfort your baby

snooks Sat 26-Jul-08 16:45:28

agree with everyone so far I'm afraid.

dittany Sat 26-Jul-08 16:46:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StarSparkle Sat 26-Jul-08 16:48:56

Thanks for your comments ! I needed someone to tell me with some clarity as my head is all over the place ! Am going up there right now !

whispywhisp Sat 26-Jul-08 16:49:17

I'm sorry but I would definitely go straight up those stairs and give her such a huge reassuring hug she so desperately needs right now. She may only be 2.5yrs and lived at the same house up until she was a year old but to her its a new strange environment and she has probably seen her Mummy get upset and having to move out of where you lived before - not only unsettling for you but massively so for her. Give her a big hug and give yourself one too.xxxxx

snooks Sat 26-Jul-08 17:04:37

starsparkle hope you're both having a nice cuddle now.

I meant to say take care of yourself and sorry your relationship has ended.

StarSparkle Sat 26-Jul-08 17:31:44

Thanks for your advice...needed a boot up the bum as am feeling a little down about it at the mo

Went up to DD read her a story and had a cuddle... she is now sleeping soundly....

Really though...thanks for 'YABU' points you made.... it made me realise and Im glad for it ! Thanks for the honest comments MN ! smile

mumeeee Sat 26-Jul-08 17:36:25

Agre with all the others.

Jux Sat 26-Jul-08 17:41:18

Bet you needed a cuddle too!

Sometimes when you're both stressed and upset it really helps to just stop worrying about routines and all that stuff, and just have a quiet sit down and cuddle together.

StarSparkle Sat 26-Jul-08 18:15:53

Thanks jux.... have sat and cuddled with her till she feel asleep and now she is fine !

Think I was fretting to much about keeping routine for me to keep my mind of things and i didn't want to unsettle her anymore.

whispywhisp Sat 26-Jul-08 18:22:12

Routines have to go out the window sometimes. For you, starsparkle, one of those times is now. Enjoy your cuddles. xxxx

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