AIBU/overly pregnancy hormonal to hate my GP after one visit and want to complain about her?(45 Posts)
Am 6 weeks pregnant, have only been pregnant once before and miscarried about this time so when I went to have my first appointment with a new GP (have just moved house and area so was just randomly assigned somebody) was really really angry and fed up to just have her throw a load of papers at me and shove me back out the door again.
When I booked the appointment the receptionist told me it would be half and hour and was anticipating a nice long chat and check up going through all the details like I had with the nurse at my old clinic for my pre-conception appointment. Instead the appointment was literally five minutes and the only test she did was to check my blood pressure. She fired a load of questions at me waited until I said whatever word it was she was looking for in the answer and then started talking over me. Didn't even get a chance to tell her about previous pregnancy as was booted out the door so quickly. She also left the door open for most of the consultation and demanded to know which hospital I want to be booked into when at 6 wks I obviously haven't had a chance to go and look yet or even decide if I want to have this baby in hospital. Generally she came off as rude and totally uncaring which is the total opposite of what you want from a doctor.
I left in a total daze and it was only once I'd got back to my house that I realised how angry I was about it. I'm the first of my friends to have kids and am feeling quite lost and nervous about it especially with my medical history without being fobbed off because she couldn't be bothered to talk properly to me.
I'm going to try and get myself moved into the midwife service so I don't have to deal with her (would rather deal with the midwives anyway) but AIBU to also want to complain about her?
Um difficult one this. Why were you seeing a GP anyway? Surely you should have been seeing a midwife?
you should be seeing MW anyway... you should be having a booking appt and then she will organise your 12 weeks scan etc.. maybe phone back and clarify what the system is.
unless there are any problems at the mo, there s nothing else a doc or MW would do at this point anyway.. your bloods etc will be done at booking appt
no YANBU in any way what so ever
<sorry for posting and running>
I have always seen a MW for my booking in appts so it seems a little wierd you saa gp.
However If she upset you you should complain.I hope you have a great pregnancy and a better experience with the midwife .
Where I live you don't get to see a midwife until after your 12 week scan - at about 14 weeks I think. Until then everything is done through your gp.
YANBU, But that's all my GP's have ever done, it's the booking in appointment where they 'book you in' for maternity care basically, you won't see the GP wrt your pregnancy again now.
It's the normal run of things but I can understand why you feel annoyed.
I had same thing with a horrid GP, when I wanted to talk about my choices of hospitals (does make me laugh a little now, being a lot further down the line on baby no.3 - but perfectly valid). He told me I had to go to the nearest one, looked at me like I had two heads when I mentioned NICE guidelines. I ended up in tears in the reception.
I avoid him like the plague but didn't complain.
The problem is on your booking in you may have the same issue - a bored, harried M/w who gives you 15 mins and rushes you out. Only way to get really nice long M/w appointments with a lovely chat and so on is, ime, to go private. But I totally realise that is not an option for many people.
Hope you get someone nicer soon and that all goes well with this pregnancy. These health professionals don't realise how vulnerable pregnant women are and how they can be very hurt by thoughtless comments.
Sounds like the Gp I saw first for DS2.
I was in there about 5mins, was about 6weeks preggers, she only actually told me when she thought I was due when I asked (after she'd said her goodbyes!!) -- "oh, umm,.... around the first week in December I think"... and when I asked if I needed to see a nurse to get appointments booked, or when I might next speak to someone about hospitals etc... she said something about nothing happening until the 12week scan and I'll get a letter about that.
End of discussion.
Load of nonsense. Silly cow.
(and I had lovely MWs both times, no harried rushed people, all spent as much time talking to me as I needed- on the NHS- so not everywhere is crap! )
horrible, i hope you won't have to deal with her too much. afaik you deal mainly with MWs in britain for most of the preg so i wouldn't panic too much just yet. chances are you won't see much of her again.
I basically just went to my local clinic and said 'hi I'm pregnant' and they booked me in with the GP so I get the impression that's how it works in this area.
Am glad I'm not being unreasonable to be annoyed even if it is just the NHS being busy and cash strapped that's the cause.
When I went to see the gp with ds, it lasted about 2 mins
me: I'm pregnant
him: have you done a test?
him: congratulations then.
He was cheery though.
I think you need to adjust your expectations a little, but that it is not unreasonable to expect to be dealt with professionally.
You should see a midwife anyway, but its my experience that they don't have much time for you in the early stages - I think they keep it short so they can spend more time with people who are further along.
congratulations, enjoy your pregnancy
I think I was also put off because I was told that first appointments were half an hour. I don't think I'd've minded quite so much if they'd said just come in later 'cos there's not much to do at the moment.
I think the receptionist has got muddled up with the midwife booking appt which is usually half hour plus. GP really doesn't actively do anything for antenatal care it will be the midwife and you should have abooking appoitnment about 10 weeks or so.
we have 2 'booking' appts, the first with the GP who puts you on the system and asks which hosptial you want (they do this now cos the guidelines have changed and they HAVE to ask), then your scan (whcih I had to book myself, so check), then your proper booking withthe mw which does take at least 30 mins and where you go over past pgs, health probs etc. etc. From now on you should only be seen by the mw anyway (maybe with the exception of 1 appt, can't remember) so don't stress too much
(I had my mw booking appt after the 12 week scan, so check with your surgery when you should have this. Worth booking early as slots get booked up quickly)
MIdwives do the "booking" and it takes 30-45mins.
GPs do the "what's the matter?"..."I'm pregnant"...."shh while I fill the forms in" appt.
It'd never be 30mins. I bet the receptionist got it wrong.
i went to the gp at 5 weeks and she chatted to me for ages... even though she was on her own and swamped that day and it was my 3rd so she knew i knew the drill.
i don't accept that they can't have a bit of common courtesy and politeness, and fgs... leaving the door open all the time!
i would be very cross!
What happened to you sounds completely normal for a first appointment. The only check that I had was a BP check, and it was just to get me "in the system". The whole hospital thing is because your antenatal notes and care will be linked to the hospital you choose. After I had checked in, the midwife then phoned me to get my 12 week ultrasound scan booked. However I haven't had a miscarriage, and I think that you should have had the opportunity to tell her that as it will obviously make a big difference to the pregnancy for you. She sounds very rude and completly uncaring.
In your position, I would ask the surgery to leave a message for the midwife - I think that it's reasonable for you to ask to talk to her before the standard first appointment (which is normally at about 10 weeks). She will be organising almost all your care, and so is the person who you will need to understand that you are much more sensitive than the "average" pregnant woman.
I can't stand my doctor. Last time I had to see her was for my 22 week appointment; I was 5 minutes late, she then kept me waiting for another 5 minutes and when I eventually saw her I was given a 6 minute lecture on time-keeping, told to find another doctor nearer my house and got about 3 minutes of "care". I see any other doctor now, will never see her again, havent complained though.
With my first I made an appointment to see the gp as soon as the test was +ve, he was lovely and said that I didn't need to do anything and that he would register me with the mw, just checked I was taking folic acid, but was friendly, and most importantly seemed excited about my baby for me. And yet he's in his 60's so must have had the same conversation loads and loads of times. With the others I've just spoken to the recpetionists and asked them to book me in with the midwife.
I think a common problem is that gps, mws, nurses (and teachers when you get to school age) are so entrenched in their systems that they forget that all of their 'clients' are new and will most likely not have a clue about what questions to ask, who to and when.
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