Background: friend is lovely person but always always late, which drives people insane!
I asked if she was free this weekend. She offered to look after ds2 for me on Sat morn for an hour so I could do something with ds1. And then suggested we go to park after. I had said no time contraints on my side except that I needed to buy 2 things at some point over weekend. She suggested stopping at supermarket on way back from park (she has a car, so all quick).
I collected ds2, went homwe to get carseats, agrred to reconvene for park in half an hour. She did say she needed to be done and home by 3.30pm.
She arrives much later than half an hour ( at least I had time to hoover and do the washing!!). We go to park. I ask her twice if we need to go yet or could the kids do one more lap on bikes (she is the driver and the one on a time frame).
She decides when we go. She stops outside shop, I run in, get my 2 items, and grab some fruit on way past the reduced section. In and out in 10 mins. We are behind schedule, and she has said she wont have time to shower now etc. But at no point did she say there was no time to pull over and me to run in. She even said 'ok kids stay in the car as it'll save time', which implies that there was time for me to go in alone if I was quick, which I was.
Anyway, I'm in and out, she makes no comment etc etc. We get home and I say I'll leave carseats in to save time, get them later, so she could get straight off. She is friendly as normal.
She goes off for a meal out with her dh and ds, comes back later for drinks with lots of people as had been arranged. I text her to ask if on time, else I could easily get the bus and not be late. She says 15mins late; it gets to 25 late and I retext to ask if I should just go (its only a 10 min drive but 30 mins on bus for me, and I was already over 40 mins late because we were going to be a bit late anyway). She turns up in the foulest mood ever and makes some comment about me texting to ask bout getting the bus even though I was the one that had stopped at the supermarket and made her late earlier and bought more than the 2 items I said I was going to (bought 1 extra, but was walking past it anyway). I've never felt such a tense atmosphere.
I'm just gonna ignore it and hope it passes. But just wondering if I was supposed to override what she said, and do a big gesture of not going to Tescos? To me, if I ask if we have time, and am told we have, and that doesnt change other than to run in alone, then in my head she's saying its still ok to go in. She is not at all shy so would have no qualms about telling me we had no time, and she knows how long it takes to drive places (I dont drive). And she knew I cuold go alone today easily. I'm very much of the belief that you say what you mean and not expect people to second guess you.
Was I wrong?
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AIBU?
Fairly dull gripe with fdriend, but I need to know if it was me in the wrong this time!
21 replies
mustrunmore · 20/07/2008 08:36
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