My MIL is a total control freak. I've always worked my arse off and got my degree and everything, but when i got pregnant she tried to get DP to talk me into getting a council house. I don't feel the need to do anything like that when I'm perfectly capable of working hard to have a nice home for my DP and baby. DP always works very hard too.
So I clash with her a lot because she's too overpowering and sticks her nose in and has too much to say for herself. She apparently likes me but she's a very selfish, self absorbed person so it doesn't come across this way.
When we had the baby I didn't want her round all the time, and I didn't want to go to hers constantly. I wanted to spend time with my new baby who had nearly died, and my DP. My family accepted this and left us to do our own thing.
When our baby nearly died 2 days after I'd given birth to him, she turned up at the hospital crying and ran straight to the baby, hugged him, then hugged DP and THEN eventually came over to me and asked if I was ok.. baring in mind I'd just been through a horrible labour, and my son had nearly died in my arms. I was trying to hold myseolf together, and she was bawling her eyes out and getting involved all over the place.
Then she got all moody because my mum helps me out all the time when DPs at work so she sees a lot of the baby as she makes an effort to. MIL won't get off her lazy arse and come and see him or do anything to help out, or ask us to call over, or ask us to go into town for a hot chocolate or anything.
She has lost babies a couple of years before i got pregnant and so she said 'this is the closest I'll get to being a mum again' when i was 9 months pregnant. Which really freaked me out.
Then she'd started being funny with us.
At his christening she left early and went to another pub with SIL,her fella and his parents. We were really annoyed. Her and DP had a big row and he told me the basic jist. The next day I rang to ask if she'd like to mind him for an hour as my nana had died. I could have asked other people but i wanted to include her so I asked her. She was in the pub as usual and she said 'I was moaning at [DP] last night because you never let us look after the baby and we feel like we can never have him on our own, and when you ask us we're out. It's such a shame. Ask [DP's] auntie instead though please.'
So i did. I like his auntie.
But I'm annoyed that she was slagging me off saying I never let her have the baby. He's only a few weeks old and he's been on children's ward a fair few times.
Am i a cow or is she?
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AIBU?
Need help with my MIL. What should I do, what am I doing so wrong, and should I let her mind my little baby? Need your words of wisdom MNers
12 replies
luvlymummy · 18/07/2008 14:00
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