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Dh's mistake has forced us to move our bedroom furniture around, and I HATE it now.

(35 Posts)
Oblomov Thu 17-Jul-08 09:04:51

Warning, I pg and hormonal.
Spare bedroom, with fitted wardrobes, all mirrored all our clothes in. So we need to turn it into a nursery. Plasterer coming this sat. I am stripping wallpaper inbetween typing.
So we agree that we need to move most of our clothes into our room. Dh finds a really nice pair wardrobes to match our bed, on ebay, that comes with an overhead box/unit.
I am delighted. Love it.
Dh says lets sell fitted wardrobes from spare room. I say, can we have free standing ones, in new nursery. In a medium sized room, you can still see ceiling height, so gives impression of bigger room compared to fitted wardrobes. Dh sees a triple pine wardrobe,on ebay, that matches the double in ds's. Great I say, move ds's into nursery. Five down one wall. Lovely. I would prefer fitted he says. he finds some. O.k. I say, i don't really like them, but I will compromise, seeing as I am so happy with new one coming, for our room.

Now dh is very very good at diy. Plumbing, joinery, fitting ... anything.
Our pine wardrobes/unit arrives, for our room. It doesn't fit. Dh has made a mistake on the measuremments. I will cut it off at the bottom, flush he says. Please don't I say, it still won't fit. No he says, I have many tricks, it will be fine. Cuts it off. Still doesn't fit. He says, we will have to move bed round. We have minorly discussed this before and I never wanted to. Plus the whole point of buying new wardrobes/unit was so that it fitted the space we had.
So we move the bed round. I am pg, but even if I wasn't I would now have to squeeze sideways along wall to get into bed. I hate it. I hate lying in this new direction. But why ? I don't know why.
I say, lets cut out losses, sell wardrobes/unit/ and put bed back. Wardrobes cost £300, he said we can't sell them now cut. I told you not to cut them I said.

What do I do? I really hate it. but I don't know why. He says I am punishing him for making a mistake. He very rarely makes mistakes. I make plenty. But its not that. It really is because I hate it now. And that I was so excited before with the idea of how it would be, I was so happy to have found a set that fited. Now it is a real pain.

AIBU ? How can we compromise. Do I have to let it go.

misdee Thu 17-Jul-08 09:07:16

get him to swap sides.

we are in a similar situation, cant fit wardrobes and crib in our room. no idea what to do.

edam Thu 17-Jul-08 09:08:31

YANBU. I would hate it. And I'm not p/g or hormonal! It's all very well for him to say he made a mistake - yup, and now it needs to be put right.

Put the wardrobes on ebay or in your local paper, SOMEONE will want to buy them even if they have been altered.

ChopsTheDuck Thu 17-Jul-08 09:10:12

bit hard to follow all that, but there is no way they can be cut any more? Or put those wardrobes in the nursery. or spread then across sparerppm/nursery? Then have the fitted ones back?

Dropdeadfred Thu 17-Jul-08 09:11:07

can you have the wardrobes that are going in the nursery instead? Sorry - think I'm confused with the amount of wardrobes you've mentioned..any way of swapping them around?

elmoandella Thu 17-Jul-08 09:15:12

make him swap sides.

Oblomov Thu 17-Jul-08 09:22:47

Yes, sorry it is so complicated.
We sell wardrobes from old spare room. Buy new set for spare room, which is the room that will become nursery.
I do not like them, but compromise, becasue am happy with set coming for our room.
I love the bed in pour room. I hate the fact that new wardrobes do not fir. I have already compromised on the fatc that I didn't like dh's choice of funriture for the nursery.
Oh god, sorry for not explaining well.
New furniture for nursery, certainly wouldn't fit in our romm.

edam Thu 17-Jul-08 09:24:39

I just couldn't be doing with someone messing around my bedroom and making it not right for me. Even if it was dh. Especially if it was dh, come to think of it!

Oblomov Thu 17-Jul-08 09:26:36

He is a big man. And would not be able to squeeze down my side. Plus I like sleeping on the right hand side of the bed. It would be wierd to change that, surely ?

potoftea Thu 17-Jul-08 09:31:55

Your dh has messed up and is most likely feeling mad with himself, so is digging his heels in.
Give him a nice speech about how you know he usually does so well at the diy, and this is just one little error with could happen to anyone, but really you need to cut your losses and get rid of the wardrobes. You need to be happy with this furniture that you'll be looking at every day for several years.

You could tell your dh that normally he gives you all you want in the bedroom, and makes you very happy, so why change nowwink

Oblomov Thu 17-Jul-08 09:37:47

He is a very traditional proud man, who doesn't normaly make mistakes. I accept that his pride is hurt. And I don't want to make it any worse. But really I hate it.
He is now able to walk straight into the room, get into bed. And now the air conditioning unit is directly on him. Before it was on the left of me and the cool air blew across our feet.
He says he loves it like this. I hate it.
I would like to insist that we cut our losees and sell the wardrobes for whatever we can get for them. And put the bed back the way it was.
But I have a feeling that this is unreasonable.

elmoandella Thu 17-Jul-08 09:58:32

no wonder he doesn't wanna change it. he's got it perfect for himself.

lol

maybe he's very cunning indeed?

thumbwitch Thu 17-Jul-08 10:04:32

No YANBU, HE is! Sod his pride, you need to be comfortable and not stressed,especially during pregnancy! Make him do something about it.

Oblomov Thu 17-Jul-08 10:15:18

He has just phoned. He apologised. I did too. He said lets not fall out about this. I started to cry. He said he will sort it.
It is our wedding anniversary on sat. The day the plasterer comes. We are booked for a posh meal.
Nothing like a bit of stress, wall paper stripping and doggy wardrobes, prior to a wedding anniversary, hey wink ?

Oblomov Thu 17-Jul-08 10:16:27

Hey Misdee, how are you going to sort your furniture dilema ?

thumbwitch Thu 17-Jul-08 10:20:02

I hope you get your wishes then Oblomov - that would be the best anniversary present!
Good luck!

misdee Thu 17-Jul-08 10:31:21

awww a soppy ending.

no idea how we're going to sort it oblomov. atm it looks like dh will be crawling into bed from the end of it.

our room is just too small. and i cant put a newborn in a seperate room to me from the start, its just not right.

thumbwitch Thu 17-Jul-08 10:37:53

misdee, i had the same problem with crib and space - ended up co-sleeping with DS for the first 5 1/2 months. DH moved into spare bed (his choice really as he "needed his sleep"). DS now in his cot in spare room.

misdee Thu 17-Jul-08 10:41:12

we dont have a spare room or bed unfortunatly.

i co-slept with dd3, but this was because dh was in hospital. then she went into her own room at about 6months old. then back in with me when dh came out of hospital.

Oblomov Thu 17-Jul-08 10:41:35

Poor Peter. Your'll have to borrow one of those dreadful hospital levy/crane things, that he is unfortunatley probably so used to, and lower him in every evening. wink

thumbwitch Thu 17-Jul-08 10:43:10

is it the wardrobes that are causing your problem Misdee? could you get a temporary clothesrail instead?

Oblomov Thu 17-Jul-08 10:44:34

Just out of interest, why did you bring dd3 back in with you, when dh came out of hospital. ?
Is dd3 co-sleeping with you now ?

misdee Thu 17-Jul-08 10:45:18

its the size of the room. position of the door and windows.

in fact its a problem with every bedroom. due to the position of the doors, means the beds can only ever be in one place. which isnt the best place. s am thinking of replacing them with folding or sliding doors.

Oblomov Thu 17-Jul-08 10:45:34

Yeah, bin / move the wardrobes.
I might bin ours wink

misdee Thu 17-Jul-08 10:47:07

dd3 moved back in wiuth me, as when dh initially came out of hospital he had the LVAD and needed a hospital bed which can be semi-reclined. the only room he couol go in was dd3 room, so she moved back in with me. dd1+2 are in the processing of moving into that bedroom (need to moe bunkbeds), and dd3 will have the room she currently shares with dd2, on her own for about 6-12montsh then baby will move in with her.

its confusing

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