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to think the usefuness of home pregnancy tests is outweighed by the grief they cause?

(90 Posts)

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SmugColditz Thu 24-Apr-08 09:23:20

My doctor has said this to me ... he said he wishes he could stop people testing because otherwise they would just think they were having a heavier period and there would be none of the trauma of knowing exactly what could have been. They would just think they hadn't 'caught' that month.

WowOoo Thu 24-Apr-08 09:23:46

Exactly! I do them because I quite like the excitement. (we are not even trying properly!!) But, alsways save it for when period is due.
I know others take it seriously. Oh, the good old days.........

WowOoo Thu 24-Apr-08 09:25:07

Did not mean to offend anyone there. I know having a child is a VERY BIG DEAL and I know that trying/ mc is horrible.

BellaBear Thu 24-Apr-08 09:25:14

I never got the testing early thing - either you are and you will be still later on, or you are and you won't be later one, but so soon that maybe it is better not to know or you aren't and your period will arrive.

I've only ever had positive pregnancy tests because of this (tested two days after I was due). And when I later misacarried, it WAS useful to know, but that was at six weeks pg so not really soon.

But it is very easy to get such cheap tests now from ebay that the temptation must get over whelming.

I know one MNer who hasn't tested once in 18 months of trying because it's a waste of money (and hope I suppose) (search messages fromt he CLearBlueFairy for further musings on this!)

Disenchanted Thu 24-Apr-08 09:25:25

I think you are right, but as one of those obsessive people the lure of the ebay '20 tests for £4' is too much of a temptation to ignore.

BellaBear Thu 24-Apr-08 09:26:08

i'm not at all sure what the point of my post was ....

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Twiglett Thu 24-Apr-08 09:27:44

I think people need to grow up a little tbh .. just because it is possible to get obsessed with something they should demonstrate some self-control and not test until at least monring of due period, and then not again until 3 days afterwards

I say this as someone who has experienced the obsession that comes with secondary infertility too (although luckily I have the distance of time so am probably using my newly-fitted 'rose-tinted spectacles' .. they make it all look shiny and easy grin)

WowOoo Thu 24-Apr-08 09:29:08

Remember that things in our mothers' day were stressful in other ways. My Ma was born during the war. My poor Gran must have been terrified....
Did they sometimes not even realise they could get preg too. my gran told me you just never did it until marriage.End of!!

YouCantTeuchThis Thu 24-Apr-08 09:29:34

We live in impatient times - when you can get an email in seconds, capture a moment instantly on your mobile and send it across the world, pay bills and move money instantly... then why on earth does it take so long to find out if you are pregnant???!!!

At least women now know about chemical pregnancies, since they are recognised more widely. Surely the more we understand about the nature of conception and pregnancy can help?

shoshe Thu 24-Apr-08 09:29:39

I had 13 m/c back in the 80's and early 90's, my dr in the end told me NOT TO TEST, till after 2 months, as I was just breaking my heart each time.

Disenchanted Thu 24-Apr-08 09:30:17

I think that it would be alot easier emothionally if I had waited each month till I was late,

but the stories on here of 'i got a + 4 days earlt' ect just make you think 'oooh maybe I could too'

and makes you want to at least see.

I know that when I tested early and got a negative I always just though , ah well maybe its too early, will try again tomorrow.

And each negative test does break your heart, but you keep doing them in hope of getting that +

Silly really.

And in my case I never really considered a chemical pregnancy. I just wanted to see that +.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2point4kids Thu 24-Apr-08 09:31:47

If tests didnt exist and you couldnt find out till later on then people would wait till longer to stop drinking/smoking
Plus if it wasnt a planned pregnancy and unwanted then it could be too late to have a choice if you had to wait to find out...

Obsessive testers would just do the am i...arent i? thing obsessively instead of testing and be checking cm or looking for symptoms etc if they culdnt test..

Benefits outweigh the heart ache imo!

YouCantTeuchThis Thu 24-Apr-08 09:32:28

I come from the school of 'knowledge is power' grin

I want to know everything about whatever my current 'project' is!!

Disenchanted Thu 24-Apr-08 09:33:53

If I ever had a chemical pregnancy I would want to know I think.

MrsTittleMouse Thu 24-Apr-08 09:33:59

But in terms of fertility it does make a huge difference to know if you conceive and then lose the baby early, or can't conceive at all. So for the one in six (?) of us that have problems it really is useful because it takes away a lot of possibilities and lets you get going with working out what's going wrong much faster.

CountessDracula Thu 24-Apr-08 09:34:01

what is a chemical pregnancy??

I must say I have been trying for second for ages and have only tested once when I was late. I didn't know you could test early!

(I am spectacularly badly informed about all these things despite being about to embark on ivf - i just don't do the obsessive thing it's too time consuming!)

2point4kids Thu 24-Apr-08 09:34:31

Whats a chemical pregnancy? A false positive?

CountessDracula Thu 24-Apr-08 09:34:39

(not sure why I must say!)

BellaBear Thu 24-Apr-08 09:35:58

actually if you have had lots of very very early mcs, maybe it is good to know, because only then can you get help for it.

YouCantTeuchThis Thu 24-Apr-08 09:37:21

Same - I would much rather know, after months/years of trying - whether we had ever managed 'sperm to egg'.

There is someone on another thread with repeated chemical pregnancies. This can now be investigated as they know conception is not the issue.

And I just prefer to know!! Same as I could be regarded as obsessing for checking CM, cervix, etc. It is my body and, I damn well want to know what's going on!!

YouCantTeuchThis Thu 24-Apr-08 09:39:00

(chemical pregnancy - egg fertilised but fails to implant properly, or successfully develop beyond blastocyst. HcG is produced but then drops, period may arrive on time, or a few days late.)

belgo Thu 24-Apr-08 09:39:30

I think we are being ripped off by manufacturers.

I do think it is useful to know about a pregnancy by week 5 at the latest because then you can adjust your pregnancy accordingly and also it's important to be aware of the symptoms of ectopic pregnancy. I see absolutely no point in testing before your period is late. I found testing detrimental to my health because I could never sleep the night before and my heart rate would soar before I carried out the test. This is why I would try and wait until my period was 3 or 4 days late. I also don't have the money to waste on tests that may be inaccurate.

(I've miscarried at 6 and 7 weeks and would have known they were miscarriages even without a positive test result because I saw the embryo sac in each case).

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