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AIBU?

Has my date stolen my keys??

999 replies

Wilhelmine · 28/11/2021 23:48

I’ve just come home with a guy I’ve been for a few dates with after a couple of drinks and we’ve had a coffee and he’s gone home. We’ve been getting on great and knew each other before as acquaintances. He’s a bit intense but nothing scary until tonight when he said “I don’t know what I’d do if this doesn’t work out”. Now I’ve just got ready for bed and can’t find my keys anywhere. I’m well organised and tidy and always know where things are. I’ve messaged him to ask if he picked them up by mistake but no reply. Am I being daft to think he might have taken them? If I can’t find them in the morning I’ll have to get the locks changed and I really don’t want to have to do that.....

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Am I being unreasonable?

1272 votes. Final results.

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You are being unreasonable
14%
You are NOT being unreasonable
86%
Lockheart · 28/11/2021 23:51

Have you left them in the lock?

It's more than a bit of a stretch to assume your date has taken the. The overwhelming odds suggest you've put them down somewhere.

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TurnUpTurnip · 28/11/2021 23:51

I think it’s more likely you’ve misplaced them tbh

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WeAreTheHeroes · 28/11/2021 23:53

You definitely had them to get in the house? Sure they're not in a coat pocket or your handbag? Fallen on the floor somewhere? Still in the lock outside? If in none of those places it sounds as though he's got them. Change the locks. You can change the barrel yourself without needing to get a locksmith out. If you have an alarm, change the code now and put it on overnight. He might have picked them up absent mindedly or there could be a more sinister motive.

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Wilhelmine · 28/11/2021 23:53

No not in the lock. Wouldn’t think it’s him apart from the scary comment earlier and the fact that he was really full on when we first got together...

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Justmuddlingalong · 28/11/2021 23:53

I think it's more likely that you've put them down somewhere without thinking if you've come in chatting together. Try and calm down and start at the outside of the front door, working your way around.

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Unreasonabubble · 28/11/2021 23:54

If in doubt, put a wedge under the door. Find something that would stop someone coming in unannounced.

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OnlyClothes · 28/11/2021 23:54

Are you safe to be there tonight? Can you wedge the door shut with something? Are your car keys on the key ring too?

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JustaPOV · 28/11/2021 23:55

Listen to your gut. He obviously makes you feel uncomfortable and so if there’s any chance that he might have them, set your alarm overnight and change locks tomorrow if keys don’t show up.

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lightandshade · 28/11/2021 23:55

My ex did this to me. Do you have a spare key you can leave in the lock ? Till
You find them or change the lock ?

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Wilhelmine · 28/11/2021 23:55

I’m hoping he picked them up absent-mindedly but will have to call him in the morning to check if he doesn’t answer my text. Fuckity fuck don’t want to have to go to the expense of changing the lock....

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TurnUpTurnip · 28/11/2021 23:57

Surely she can double lock the door so even if he did have them he couldn’t get in?

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Justmuddlingalong · 28/11/2021 23:58

Are your locks covered by home insurance?

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2catsandhappy · 28/11/2021 23:58

Most likely you put them somewhere unexpected as you were not in your ususal routine.
Otherwise, did you leave him alone? Did he suddenly rush off?
Can you find something to wedge under the door and leave the sitting room light on all night?

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MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry · 28/11/2021 23:58

Can you lock the door from inside so it can’t be opened with a key from outside? What about your car key? Is it on the house keys?

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Honeyroar · 28/11/2021 23:58

I’m sure they’ll turn up.

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Wilhelmine · 28/11/2021 23:58

Have looked everywhere, house very tidy so am sure I would have found them. I’ve got bolts on the doors so don’t feel that unsafe.

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TurnUpTurnip · 28/11/2021 23:59

There’s really no need for the hysteria you’ve more than likely put them down somewhere, double lock the door if you are worried pretty much all doors can be double locked from the inside, you obviously felt comfortable enough with him to invite him back to yours

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WindowsSmindows · 29/11/2021 00:01

Listen to your gut.
Do you want to call someone to stay with you tonight?
Get the locks changed tomorrow.

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Wilhelmine · 29/11/2021 00:02

Can’t lock from inside as can’t find keys but have bolts.

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RaininSummer · 29/11/2021 00:02

I hope he doesn't have your keys but it's possible. I don't like what he said though. Very intense and concerning I think.

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Beckert · 29/11/2021 00:03

There’s really no need for the hysteria you’ve more than likely put them down somewhere, double lock the door if you are worried pretty much all doors can be double locked from the inside, you obviously felt comfortable enough with him to invite him back to yours

Well clearly the op doesn't feel comfortable now. With her keys missing. And the weird comments. Hardly hysterical. Are you the date? 🙄

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Wilhelmine · 29/11/2021 00:04

Yes @RaininSummer, we’ve only been dating for a few weeks. I’ll have another quick look for the keys now....

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Wafflesnsniffles · 29/11/2021 00:07

How did you drive home/get back into your house without your keys? (practical question!)
Im with you op Id be tempted to replace them too.

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MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry · 29/11/2021 00:07

Check your bag and the pockets of everything you were wearing. Down the sofa, under the sofa. In the fridge, the bin, any cupboards you opened to get glasses etc.

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Nanny67 · 29/11/2021 00:07

My ex did this too. I convinced myself I had gone mad but I know it was him even though he denied it.

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