Neighbour wants to "share" my driveway. I... don't

(348 Posts)
TheUnexpectedPickle Thu 25-Nov-21 08:04:15

Parking one, buckle up.
I live in a 3 storey Victorian townhouse, my flat is at the bottom, and above me is a 2 story house owned by Snooty Neighbour. I rent, if that's relevant.

The driveway belongs to my flat and the steps up to SNs front door are about halfway up my drive.

Its a double drive and Paul-Next-Door, who owns all 3 storeys of his house, has the other half of the drive.

I bumped in to SN last week and she commented that she is struggling to find parking on the street now that I've moved in. The flat was empty for a while and she was parking on the drive. She then said she's noticed that I'm out for long stretches of time so possibly she could use my drive when I'm out. I pointed out that she wouldn't know when I'm going to be back, so she wouldn't know when to move her car. She then suggested that in that case I park on the street!

So it appears she is imaging some sort of first come first serve arrangement. It took me off guard a bit so I said I'd think about it. Obviously, I thought "no fucking chance"

Last night she caught me coming home and asked if I'd had the chance to think about it. I politely declined and explained that I don't really want to be searching for parking after a 12 hour shift so it doesn't work for me. She then suggested I message her my rota so she knows when she can use the drive, to make it "fair" and then let her know when I'm going to other places and when I'll be back.

Wtf!? I don't want to have to tell a random woman when I'm going to be home! I'm 35 years old, I don't even tell my mother that!

I probably didn't help the situation as I laughed when I said no to that. She then got huffy and started going on about me letting other cars park on the drive. Other cars being my DP, who I then park in front of and block in and Paul Next Door when he had a skip on his drive and asked me very nicely if he could park there for about 2 hours while he had a tyre changed. Neither of these things caused me any inconvenience.

The conversation ended up with her slinking off muttering about me being "unfair"

Bonkers.

I know I'm not being unreasonable really but her whole expectation that this was a great idea has me questioning myself just a tiny bit.

AIBU?

OP’s posts: |
SissySpacekAteMyHamster Thu 25-Nov-21 08:06:21

No she's a cheeky fecker and you need to keep saying no to her.

Smellymoo Thu 25-Nov-21 08:06:55

Sounds like you’ve been more than polite and fair!!!

Well done for standing your ground!

Im going to try and be like you!!!!

LethargicActress Thu 25-Nov-21 08:07:05

Yanbu.

WimpoleHat Thu 25-Nov-21 08:07:12

No! You’re not. She’s totally unreasonable to ask. Our neighbours can be like this. It’s awkward- we’re conditioned to be “nice”. But they aren’t embarrassed about being pushy, so why should we be embarrassed about saying “no!”?

MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry Thu 25-Nov-21 08:07:19

Of course you’re not being UR. She’s a CF. Laughing was the correct response.

IncompleteSenten Thu 25-Nov-21 08:07:59

Tell her you don't need to be fair. It's your drive.

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saltontoast Thu 25-Nov-21 08:08:03

No, she's being completely unreasonable

Munchyseeds Thu 25-Nov-21 08:09:13

You sound perfectly sane to me!
What planet does she live on??

Fomofo Thu 25-Nov-21 08:09:45

Tell her to get a bike, they're easy to park

PantsandBoots Thu 25-Nov-21 08:10:46

If you are renting, then surely you couldnt allow someone else to use the property without the landlord's permission.

In any case, it has the potential to get complicated, so I would not agree either!

Shedmistress Thu 25-Nov-21 08:10:51

Keep laughing and saying no.

Totalwasteofpaper Thu 25-Nov-21 08:11:42

If anything happens or she parks on the drive rope in Paul next door.

We are mortgaged up to the tits precisely because my DH and I refused to dick about with on road parking in London.

I’d quite like living in one of those mansions on bishops avenue that are sat empty 330 days a year, but I don’t have the right. Neither does she…

ChiefInspectorParker Thu 25-Nov-21 08:13:01

Yes, laughing was the correct response. It shows that not only was her request unreasonable, it was utterly ridiculous. Don’t give her an inch - she is clearly very pushy.

Canigooutyet Thu 25-Nov-21 08:13:10

She could have bought somewhere with parking rather than rely on others parking spaces.

MintyGreenDream Thu 25-Nov-21 08:14:19

We have a legally owned shared drive and the poor young lad next door has parked on the street ever since i passed my test 6 months ago blush we were both sick of the messaging of can I get my car out pls ? And I think he's admitted defeat tbh. To have that nightmare when the drive isn't anything to do with SN is batshit,can't fault you.

Orangesox Thu 25-Nov-21 08:16:11

Cheeky mare! If she was that concerned about parking, she should buy somewhere with parking or rent a local parking spot / garage. What’s not fair, is that she’s essentially harassing you as a means to wear you down until you agree to this batshittery.

TheUnexpectedPickle Thu 25-Nov-21 08:16:30

@Smellymoo luckily I already had an inkling that she's a bit... eccentric- I had a previous thread in which she asked me to clean out her car when she was doing mine- so at least it wasn't entirely out of the blue!

@Totalwasteofpaper yep, I used to live in London and parking was such a hassle that the driveway was a non negotiable when I was looking for this place

OP’s posts: |
Bagelsandbrie Thu 25-Nov-21 08:16:56

Nah she needs to feck off.

What a cheek!

MiddleParking Thu 25-Nov-21 08:17:16

It sounds like you’ve already given a little bit too much room for manoeuvre with saying you’d think about it and for questioning yourself even a tiny bit now. I’d be the same, but now you know you’re definitely not UR I’d be a lot ruder to that neighbour and come down like a ton of bricks if she shows any signs of pisstaking.

LoveGrooveDanceParty Thu 25-Nov-21 08:18:37

Life isn’t fair. It’s not her drive way.

You are, of course, not being unreasonable.

SmallPrawnEnergy Thu 25-Nov-21 08:20:23

MintyGreenDream

We have a legally owned shared drive and the poor young lad next door has parked on the street ever since i passed my test 6 months ago blush we were both sick of the messaging of can I get my car out pls ? And I think he's admitted defeat tbh. To have that nightmare when the drive isn't anything to do with SN is batshit,can't fault you.

So horrible taking advantage of the fact he’s “admitted defeat”. You don’t sound any better than the neighbour to be honest, this “poor young lad” actually legally had a right to share the drive and you’ve claimed it as your own. You should nor park for 6 months on the street since you’ve hogged it the entire time.

HomeSliceKnowsBest Thu 25-Nov-21 08:22:41

Keep slapping the CF down. She is deranged.

caringcarer Thu 25-Nov-21 08:25:13

Keep practicing saying no. The more you do it the easier it gets.

AliasGrape Thu 25-Nov-21 08:27:26

Ask her to pop a key to her place through the door with a list of when she’s going to be away/ out over the next few months - you’ve got some stuff you want to store in her house since she’s got the extra space and after all it’s only ‘fair’. Or maybe you fancy using her bath or watching the widescreen telly or having a potter round the garden and since you don’t have these things and she does you’re sure she’d want to make it ‘fair’.

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