Me and my partner met at a sports activity and met a lot of like minded people along the way who we started going to other activities with such as camping, meals out, parties, etc. We have done this for about 7 years with about 10 people with their partners too.
We have 2 young children so havent been able to get out and about as much as we were able to before kids but we do still go with everyone when we can make it.
I like everyone in the group apart from one girl (let's call her Sarah) who I just cant get along with but i've always invited when I've organised something as I don't like anyone being excluded. Everything was always fine.
One of the girls organised an afternoon tea and while there someone mentioned being excited about going to Sarah's 30th birthday meal in a few weeks. This is the first I'd heard about it but i didn't say anything and Sarah didn't look ashamed or anything. I just let it go. I think I was too shocked to say anything and didn't want to cause a scene in front of everyone else.
Then someone got in touch with my DP asking if he was going on David's stag do (Sarah's partner - who we both met at our original sporting activity) as he will book the room for the 2 of them. We hadn't heard anything about it. We got given a card with the date of the wedding but haven't received the actual official invite. My DP was then added to this stag group but my partner doesn't want to go as he feels like he wasn't wanted in the first place.
I thought if there's a stag do then there must be a hen too and when I asked someone, there was a hen organised and one of our other friends is bridesmaid and is organising the room/hotel for that so I got the feeling we were being purposely excluded.
I've logged on to Facebook this morning and Sarah has put up loads of pictures of her 30th birthday meal with everyone there apart from us.
My DP has been friends with 3 of the fellas who went to it for 30 odd years but they didn't say anything although they might have assumed that we were invited.
My question now tho is what do we do now? We are still invited to events from everyone else which is good but I don't want to see Sarah and David now and they always go to these events. My natural reaction is not to want to go cos they are there but that is being quite childish. On the other hand I don't want to speak to them either. The worst thing is sarah makes a point of coming over to me and talking to me so I can't really avoid her. I did notice at the afternoon tea that she kept asking me questions but when I answered, she'd interrupt me and say something else or would ask the waitress something. I found it quite rude.
Then there is the issue of whether we invite them to anything that we organise or not. I'm thinking not but should we take the higher ground and not be like them?
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Suddenly excluded from friendship group
281 replies
timelord92 · 24/10/2021 10:33
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