Mum seems obsessed with the cost of things.

(178 Posts)
Neondisco Thu 29-Jul-21 12:08:40

My mum seems increasingly obsessed with the cost of things. She's in her early 60s and still works a few days a week. My dad is retired. They live in a house worth around 650k (in the North) and have a few 100k from my dad's early retirement /redundancy. He gets a pension. So not hard up.

But increasingly every conversion I have we end up talking about the cost of things. Particularly food and drink. She's adamant that food and drink have massively increased in cost since lockdown. Both in shops and hospitality.she thinks many places are trying to claw loat money back.

I'm a bit worried she's stressed about money, although I'm not sure why she would be. I'm also a bit worried about why she's latched onto this as a thing. Or have things actually gone up and I haven't noticed? It's obviously not massively effecting me before anyone asks! Apart from I just have to nod along to he talking about it. I'm also a little bit sad that she is maybe not doing things she would enjoy because of her perception she's now being ripped off. It does seem ever so slightly defensive.

Just wondering if anyone else has family members like this an/or if I'm being unreasonable and prices have gone up since lockdown? So my mum is actually right?

OP’s posts: |
DinosaurDiana Thu 29-Jul-21 12:10:06

She’s getting older, it’s a thing lots of them do.
My DF miders about stuff that’s not worth bothering about. He never used to be like this.
But I agree, prices have gone up.

TeapotCollection Thu 29-Jul-21 12:10:47

She’s definitely right that the price of food and drink has gone up. I’d actually take it further and say almost everything has!

Camomila Thu 29-Jul-21 12:12:01

Has she not gone out much due to Covid? ...if the supermarket is the only place she goes out regularly she might just be noticing things more.

WoodPell Thu 29-Jul-21 12:12:15

Where in "the North"? My parents live in Yorkshire and embody the "How much?!" stereotype. grin

mintylovely Thu 29-Jul-21 12:12:23

Prices have definitely gone up.

Gumboots29 Thu 29-Jul-21 12:13:35

Yeah my mum is like this and always has been. Tbf she is at the other end of the financial spectrum so I totally understand why she watches her money.

She does however project it on to me. She asks me the cost of literally everything I buy to the extent that it somewhat sucks the joy out of things as I feel guilty about spending the money on nice bits and bobs. Nothing lavish but say a nice loaf from the bakery at the weekend. ‘Why are you spending that on a loaf? 79p in Iceland’ etc.

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WoodPell Thu 29-Jul-21 12:13:49

In seriousness though, yes, I think things have gone up. Things that were £1 seem to be more like £1.30, like margarine.

DinosaurDiana Thu 29-Jul-21 12:13:55

Is it time for them to downsize ?
A house of that value sounds like it might be too big/costly for the two of them.

Neondisco Thu 29-Jul-21 12:16:24

WoodPell

Where in "the North"? My parents live in Yorkshire and embody the "How much?!" stereotype. grin

The North East.

I only really said it re the worth of the house as I know in London it can get you a 3 bed terrace.

So not as much of a stereotype here but probably still a thing.

OP’s posts: |
MaskingForIt Thu 29-Jul-21 12:17:06

Prices have gone up, it’s what we voted for! You can’t scare your cheap migrant labour away and expect prices to remain the same 😂

Neondisco Thu 29-Jul-21 12:17:47

DinosaurDiana

Is it time for them to downsize ?
A house of that value sounds like it might be too big/costly for the two of them.

Jesus do not get me started! The house is massive. I agree. But I don't think they would consider it.

OP’s posts: |
Billybagpuss Thu 29-Jul-21 12:20:03

My mums always been a bit like this, but has definitely got worse recently, she won’t spend a bean on herself as she’s ‘saving for my inheritance’ I’d far rather she got herself a hearing aid so she could enjoy conversations again for the last few years, but nope. She won’t have it that we’re ok.

Aroundtheworldin80moves Thu 29-Jul-21 12:20:21

I think its natural to worry about rising costs and reduced income to retirement.

Neondisco Thu 29-Jul-21 12:21:05

Camomila

Has she not gone out much due to Covid? ...if the supermarket is the only place she goes out regularly she might just be noticing things more.

This is also probably true to an extent.

Interesting people are saying things have gone up... and yes covid plus brexit I know has reduced cheap labour so what do we expect.

I genuinely haven't really noticed massively increased costs if I'm honest.

Poss an age thing too?

OP’s posts: |
BIWI Thu 29-Jul-21 12:23:34

I think it probably reflects her lifestage.

Both DH and I retired recently, and it really does make you think about the cost of things in a way you don't when you're working, not only with a steady income but also the prospect of your income increasing through salary rises/bonuses etc.

We're very comfortable, but it doesn't stop you looking at things like utility bills going up (gas, electricity and water here) and being concerned.

omgthepain Thu 29-Jul-21 12:26:35

@Neondisco
My Dad is the same he's 85 he's outraged by the cost he lives in the 1970's!!
However your Mum is right things have definitely gone up without a doubt even at Aldi and Lidl's

Nurseynoodles Thu 29-Jul-21 12:26:54

My parents are like this and it has made me so anxious over the years.

Everything I buy is too expensive, even if I’m getting the cheapest thing I can! We only go out for meals if they’re shitty 241 or 25% off before 5pm. I renovated my house and chose the cheapest everything because I felt bad spending money (that I had) on nice things when my dad was on the phone saying we got that done for half that price (yeah in 1997 in a cheaper area of the country).

Prices have definitely gone up though. Come to think about it, I comment on it a lot so I must be turning into my Mum!

soupey1 Thu 29-Jul-21 12:27:32

Things have definitely gone up considerably in price, our weekly shop is significantly higher for the same items.
If you’re on a fixed income this is a concern especially as the interest on savings is so poor at the moment.

OverByYer Thu 29-Jul-21 12:27:38

I think it’s an age thing too ( although prices have definitely gone up) my parents are in their 70s and everything is more of a worry for them than before

theboringidentity Thu 29-Jul-21 12:28:39

They have gone up .
There is not a lot to talk about these days either. Apart from the obvious .

EadnothTheStaller Thu 29-Jul-21 12:29:02

My nan used to drive me mad going on about the price of stuff, and my MIL did too. I mean, things get more expensive over time, everyone knows that, right?

Except, I've just hit my fifth decade and suddenly I find my concept of what things cost can't keep up with inflation and I find myself shocked, frequently, at the price of things! shock So maybe it comes to us all in the end? I don't know.

I do try not to go on about it though. grin

the80sweregreat Thu 29-Jul-21 12:29:29

Things have increased massively and I too worry more about money now than I did years ago even though I had less than I do now ( not rich btw, but not as skint as we used to be)
It's just another worry , you do more of this as you get older!
No point telling her not to fret really. Just nod and smile.

JaffaRaf Thu 29-Jul-21 12:31:22

Prices have gone up, it’s just factual. But also having a 650k house in the north east means they have a house that is most likely very expensive to run! So maybe they have money worries, you can’t no for sure. Or maybe having lived without hospitality for quite a while she just doesn’t see the value in it anymore and so it seems too expensive. YANBU for worrying about her being stressed, but she may have genuine reason for it.

DaisyDozyDee Thu 29-Jul-21 12:32:27

It be her lifestage, particularly if her pension situation is entirely or mostly dependent on your dad. It could also be just her life experience. Being able to remember times of very high inflation gives you a much better idea of how bad things can quickly get.

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