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AIBU?

To want to sell a gift

308 replies

Lastsundayinjuly · 25/07/2021 20:10

I was bought an expensive present a few months ago, worth over a thousand pounds.

I don’t use it and won’t have many opportunities to.

I want to sell it but the person who gave it to me is clearly against this.

Is this horribly ungrateful of me or makes sense? (I could really, really use the money.)

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Am I being unreasonable?

834 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
40%
You are NOT being unreasonable
60%
Marlena1 · 25/07/2021 20:12

I've done this. I hate waste so much. Does the person have to know?

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TidyDancer · 25/07/2021 20:12

The general consensus is that once something is given to you, it's yours to do with as you wish. I do think there may be some circumstances under which that might not be the case.

Can you give a bit more information? What was it given for? Any sentimental value to it? Was it given with a purpose? Etc.

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thefirstmrsrochester · 25/07/2021 20:13

If the person who gave you the gift is against you selling it in, I really don’t think you could sell it without damaging the relationship you have with them.

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shapes1 · 25/07/2021 20:15

What's the gift

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DrRichardBurke · 25/07/2021 20:16

MacBook?

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Lastsundayinjuly · 25/07/2021 20:19

@thefirstmrsrochester

If the person who gave you the gift is against you selling it in, I really don’t think you could sell it without damaging the relationship you have with them.

That’s my worry. Tried to present it as ‘we would have the money for THIS.’
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SleepingStandingUp · 25/07/2021 20:20

I think if they're going to know, you risk damaging the relationship.
Why did they give you something so expensive without you wanting it?

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Lastsundayinjuly · 25/07/2021 20:21

Thought I’d enjoy it I suppose.

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THisbackwithavengeance · 25/07/2021 20:21

It depends.

If someone paid let's say £2,000 for a gift which a couple of months later, you sell for £500 as second hand, then clearly the person who bought the gift has effectively spunked £1500 against the wall which would piss me off if I were the original purchaser.

If you can sell for more or less its original retail price then it's less of an issue.

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MichelleScarn · 25/07/2021 20:21

Engagement ring?

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pleasedonttextmyman · 25/07/2021 20:21

I can't see any problem in selling, but I am not sure why you would actually tell them in the first place.

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Lastsundayinjuly · 25/07/2021 20:23

Because its absence would be noticed.

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DogsSausages · 25/07/2021 20:24

Is it from your partner, I would be hurt if someone sold something I gave them and you wont get the same money that they paid for it. Could the person who bought it use it.

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Netflixwoes · 25/07/2021 20:24

I vote Mulberry handbag???

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SleepingStandingUp · 25/07/2021 20:24

Op if you just say what it is and who brought it, people can give you proper advice

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BarefootHippieChick · 25/07/2021 20:24

Did you ask for the gift, or hint in any way you'd like it? If not then it's a bit daft of them to fork out that much money on something you 'might like'. Will they definitely find out if you sell it?

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Stompythedinosaur · 25/07/2021 20:25

Do you have to tell them?

Ultimately if it was gifted to you it would not be unreasonable to do whatever you want with it.

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SapphosRock · 25/07/2021 20:25

I reckon electric bike.

Tough one op. I don't think I could do it if it was a gift from my partner.

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BarefootHippieChick · 25/07/2021 20:26

I assume it was bought by your partner?

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pleasedonttextmyman · 25/07/2021 20:27

if someone spends a thousand pounds on a gift for you, aren't they close enough to understand you really need the money?

It's tricky, depends what the gift was as well.

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LivingLaVidaCovid · 25/07/2021 20:27

Depends on the gift.

From my DH and we can afford it - I'd keep it
From my DH and we can't afford it - exchange for something useful that we want/need.
A giant impractical piece of furniture from my horrible controlling narc grandma - it would be going back immediately

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BunnytheFriendlyDragon · 25/07/2021 20:28

I think you speak to them and explain it's not something you'll use abs to avoid it going to waste would they mind if you exchange it for X

The fact you talk about selling makes me think it's jewellery but can the item simply be returned?

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Lastsundayinjuly · 25/07/2021 20:28

I’m absolutely lost as to how saying what it is would lead to proper advice. If you can explain why this is necessary I will gladly share.

I don’t believe I did hint that I wanted it. Misguided generosity I think.

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DroopyClematis · 25/07/2021 20:29

You really need to tell us what it is and who gave it to you as we need context in order to advise.

Was it a sofa from great aunt Maud or an oil painting from grandfather?
Or a spa weekend from your friends?

It would really help us to formulate an opinion.

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Lastsundayinjuly · 25/07/2021 20:30

If you can explain why this is necessary, sure.

I’m not sure I understand why you need to know this,I’m afraid.

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