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AIBU?

What would you think if you saw this dog?

262 replies

Tailbetweenlegs · 25/06/2021 10:47

I’ve bought my dog a bright yellow harness and lead that say I NEED SPACE and NERVOUS in big letters. I got it because he’s a nervous rescue and doesn’t like strange dogs approaching, and can be nervous of people getting too close/if they startle him (he barked and snapped at a woman the other week who I didn’t see come running behind me which prompted me to buy this).
We’re working with a trainer and he’s improved a bit but I think there will always be a management aspect to his behaviour (fairly sure he’s not bitten anyone in his history, not let off the lead, he’s never around children so I don’t think he’s a danger to anyone).

I walked him in his new outfit today and a man rolled his eyes and dramatically jumped out of the way, a woman stopped me to ask if he was nervous (really!) and a woman with a dog walked right past with her dog staring at mine. I normally walk in quiet places, this was just a quick trip round the block and happened to be busier than normal.

So should I not bother with an I NEED SPACE lead/harness. I’m interested to hear how it comes across and what you’d think if you saw a dog in this/if you’d notice. I just mean it as a warning so people give us a bit of a wide berth so they aren’t startled if they get barked at by quite a big dog. I don’t expect people to go massively out of their way to avoid us (he’s on a short lead anyway) but I’m worried it comes across as passive aggressive or will invite attention which is the opposite of what I want. Dog people and dog haters (I know there’s a lot on here) what would you think?

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Am I being unreasonable?

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Bryonyshcmyony · 25/06/2021 10:48

I probably wouldn't notice until I was too close for it to help anyway!

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BelleClapper · 25/06/2021 10:50

I have one for my lab. It’s largely ignored. People are twats.

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Bryonyshcmyony · 25/06/2021 10:50

Some local neighbours have a rescue and he wears a muzzle. That seems to do the job of reminding people to give him a wide berth. Those shouty leads are a bit passive aggressive and I'm not sure they work anyway.

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SoddingWeddings · 25/06/2021 10:51

My concern as a dog owner (of a pair of numpties), would be why is a nervous dog with a history of snapping not muzzled? You can get soft ones.

I've seen plenty of dogs with the yellow or red warning harnesses and leads and just give them a wide berth.

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sadperson16 · 25/06/2021 10:51

I'm not sure this is a dog issue I dont have a dog and I am anonymous looking.People are jumping out of the way in a dramatic fashion,more or less forcing me to walk in the road,driving like lunatics,tutting,scowling and so on.

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NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 25/06/2021 10:51

I would worry hugely about a large animal with behaviour issues significant enough for you to feel that this harness was necessary, being kept as a domestic pet.

You might not think he is a danger to anyone but it might be very traumatic for people to be barked and snapped at, especially children.

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NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 25/06/2021 10:52

Ps yes I would expect a dog with such issues to be muzzled in public.

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spiderlight · 25/06/2021 10:52

I'm very much a dog person and have had a very, very nervous rescue dog in the past, so I would think 'good for you!' pop my dog on a lead if we were in the park, give you a smile and move out of your way. That's the only decent thing to do, but there are numpties everywhere, unfortunately.

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Justforphoto · 25/06/2021 10:52

If you need space for your dog I'd expect you to find the space not expect me walking mine to do so but the harness and lead would stop me approaching you at all, not take offence when you turn away from us and mean I wouldn't think anything of it if your dog started barking and straining. I do however think you are unreasonable to expect other people to go out of their way at all to avoid you.

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Alfxn · 25/06/2021 10:53

I think it sounds like a great idea. People can be really silly about approaching, and allowing their children and dogs to approach/run straight up to other dogs whom they don't know. If your dog then bit them out of fear, or would be all blamed on him. He could also become scared of walks full stop if his boundaries are constantly crossed.
If he's a large or "scary" looking breed some may take it the wrong way but I wouldn't stress about it.

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BastardMonkfish · 25/06/2021 10:54

I'd think you're a responsible owner and stay out of the way, but like others I'd also think maybe that dog needs muzzled.

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4PawsGood · 25/06/2021 10:54

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

Ps yes I would expect a dog with such issues to be muzzled in public.

Why though? We have a dog that’s nervous, but she just jumps back away from other dogs and cowers. Never had a hint of a snap or a growl in the years we have had her. I appreciate not all dogs are like that, but some are.
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drinkingwineoutofamug · 25/06/2021 10:54

@BelleClapper

I have one for my lab. It’s largely ignored. People are twats.

Came to say the same thing. Parents still seem to think my dog wants stroking 🙄
Easier to tell them to stay the fuck away
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ThatWriterInTheCorner · 25/06/2021 10:54

I've seen a few dogs with those on. If I can, I pass them so the owner is between me and the dog, and I try not to look at the dog as I do so. Basically trying to be nice and boring, and not give it any reason to think I'm going to hassle it! I don't assume it's bitey and evil, just that it's not the sort of dog that appreciates attention from strangers.

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TheMagicPudding · 25/06/2021 10:54

I tend to put mine on a lead if I can see a dog is on theirs, particularly if its a yellow or red lead and harness. It not only protects your dog ideally, but it protects mine. If your dog bit/ attacked mine then my view is youve taken steps to prevent it, but I do agree if your dog is a snapper then a muzzle is a good idea because sometimes I dont see them until its too late. I personally dont find them passive agressive, youve probably just met some idiots unfortunately.

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MrsVeryTired · 25/06/2021 10:54

I would respect the signs but I am a dog person.

My DSis had a very reactive quite aggressive large dog, she had him wear a muzzle but tbh it still didn't stop people letting their dogs run up to him shouting "its ok, he's friendly". Her DDog was definitely not!

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BastardMonkfish · 25/06/2021 10:55

@Justforphoto

If you need space for your dog I'd expect you to find the space not expect me walking mine to do so but the harness and lead would stop me approaching you at all, not take offence when you turn away from us and mean I wouldn't think anything of it if your dog started barking and straining. I do however think you are unreasonable to expect other people to go out of their way at all to avoid you.


Yeah this is also a good point. If a dog needs space and is nervous is walking them on the streets really a good idea? I guess if there's alternative you don't have a choice.
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CharlotteRose90 · 25/06/2021 10:55

I have a dog and to be honest if I saw your collar and harness I’d avoid you completely. Although if I’m walking mine down the road id expect you to move out of the way first and find space not expect me too.

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Peace43 · 25/06/2021 10:58

I have one for my dog as he doesn’t want to be approached by other peoples kids or stroked by strangers. He doesn’t growl or bite but he looks incredibly uncomfortable and will back away / hide behind me / cower. I couple it with “please don’t strike the dog” statements. It does work a bit and seems to encourage parents to control their kids slightly better. I do often get asked if he’s nervous though. Duhhhh, yes, that’s why he has a yellow lead with nervous written in it!!!

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LadyCatStark · 25/06/2021 10:58

As a new puppy owner, I’d be pleased to know where I stood with your dog and would give him a wide berth. I’m still not quite sure of the unwritten rules around dogs saying hi to each other and of course every owner has different preferences. Mine follows the “everyone must be desperate to say hello to me” philosophy so I’d prefer to know that yours didn’t want mine to come and say hi without having to do the awkward “is it ok for him to say hello?” thing.

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Peace43 · 25/06/2021 10:58

Stroke not strike!! But I’d prefer them not to strike him either!

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looptheloopinahulahoop · 25/06/2021 10:58

I think if I saw a bright harness from some distance I would expect it to be an assistance dog, which is probably the opposite of what you want, as people would expect an assistance dog to be docile and stay out of trouble.

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Snoopysimaginaryfriend · 25/06/2021 10:58

‘a woman with a dog walked right past with her dog staring at mine.’

I get some people are idiots but I can’t dictate what my dog looks at when he’s walking down the road!

It’s also unreasonable to say they ‘walked right past’. Where should they walk? If your dog has the problem you move out of the way.

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UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme · 25/06/2021 10:59

If he snaps, regardless of the fact its out of fear, he needs to be muzzled in public places. A lead with writing on it doesn't absolve you of responsibility if he bites someone. The lead and harness are fine and help people understand why he's muzzled, if they're in proximity for long enough to think about it and not busy dealing with their own stuff rather than carefree and at a loose end, with plenty of time to think about you and your dog!

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Aprilx · 25/06/2021 10:59

I’d be quite angry if your big dog has such issues but is not muzzled. It sounds like you want everybody to clear the path whilst you walk your aggressive dog, taking no responsibility other than have your dog wear a big sign.

From a distance I would presume a dog harness with writing would be to say it is sometime of a working dog, i.e. a particularly well trained one, not one its owner cannot control.

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