What should I tell my sister? I don't want to tell her the full truth!

[glowyowy]

Ok so long story short my sister is a mortgage broker. I am in the process looking to buy a house with dh.

Without getting into it we have the cash necessary to buy a house outright. My sister does not know this...for two reasons

1. She talks A LOT and would find this great gossip.
2. She has an enormous jealousy problem.

So, she knows we are looking as it was hard to keep that a secret but now she is asking why we didn't use her as our broker. I don't know what to say. Either way she'll be upset/insulted/jealous and therefore angry.

What do I say? Lie? Or tell her the truth! Wwyd??

[Iveputmyselfonthenaughtystep]

You didn't want to mix money and family. Simple

[Iveputmyselfonthenaughtystep]

(Ie- skirt the whole issue)

[HirplesWithHaggis]

You prefer to keep your business separate from your personal life.

[CrazylazyJane]

That you've been advised that it's not a good idea to mix family and money.

[HollowTalk]

Your bank was offering a really good deal? Then quickly check on the bank's website for their rate.

[TubeOfSmarties]

I think it's fairly normal to avoid using family / close friends for anything financial. You don't need to tell her your circumstances, just tell her you'd prefer to keep it private.

[TheRebelle]

Presumably she couldn’t be your broker, it would be a conflict of interest, even if it’s not just tell her that’s what someone told you so you didn’t want to put her in an awkward position.

[Fitforforty]

I agree. You don’t want to mix business with pleasure.

[Cattitudes]

If anything went wrong you wouldn't want it to affect your relationship with her.

[Bargebill19]

Business and friendship are not a good mix.
She should know that.

[Bksjshsbbev2737]

If she’s going to be upset whatever you do then tell her the truth; it’s likely she’d find out at some point and it’ll just make it worse that you lied.

[RampantIvy]

The not mixing family and money is the best one.

[billy1966]

@HirplesWithHaggis

You prefer to keep your business separate from your personal life.

This.

And don't move from it.

If she has a tantrum, let her.

Best to not be too involved with family if they are as you describe her.

You certainly don't want her to know your business.

[tallduckandhandsome]

Yes, I agree. Say you and DH agreed not to mix family and business and you have to respect that.

[YellowFish12]

Yup just say you didn’t want to mix family and money

[CandyLeBonBon]

Yeah as pp have stated, you didn't want to mix family and money. Also maybe say something about conflict of interest and mumble about insider trading and it looking a bit dodgy as you back slowly out of the door, getting ready to take cover?!

[squiglet111]

Your work/husband's have contacts with mortgage brokers that offer you a discount deal due to your job?

[tallduckandhandsome]

@squiglet111

Your work/husband's have contacts with mortgage brokers that offer you a discount deal due to your job?

Lies will just complicate the issues.

[GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER]

If she had a good old nose on the Land Reg after purchase, she could see whether there’s a mortgage on it or not.
Just saying.
It wouldn’t say for how much, but IIRC it will say who the lender is.
So maybe you’d like to take out a tiddly little one, in case.

[Ellpellwood]

Don't say it's a conflict of interest. It isn't. She will know this. I'd say you didn't want her to know your finances inside out.

[cauliflowerkorma]

You current mortgage was already a
Cracking deal and fully portable? Presuming she thinks you already had one.

Or we needed to restructure some of our other investments etc to help finance the deal so we used our usual guy and did it all
At once.

Or yes keeping pleasure and business
Separate might work.

Or DH prefers not
To use a broker so we sorted it ourselves.

Totally understand your reasonings i am very private about finances

[TriangularPrism]

You're not using a broker. Easy.

[glowyowy]

If she had a good old nose on the Land Reg after purchase, she could see whether there’s a mortgage on it or not.
Just saying.
It wouldn’t say for how much, but IIRC it will say who the lender is.
So maybe you’d like to take out a tiddly little one, in case.

@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER really? Ah ffs this is driving me crazy. 😭 she'll want to know!! She is so flipping nosey

[HollowTalk]

So take out a mortgage for a very small sum which won't charge you to repay it early, give it a year and repay in full.

[Ostryga]

Just say you’ve got a deal and going ahead. If she asks just say you don’t need advice.

I bought my house outright and have never told anyone (apart from MN!).

Don’t make a song and dance, and don’t bring it up. Just say you’ve sorted it and change the conversation.